What's up? Not the planes, there's a terrorist on board

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Knock knock Who's there Police

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Why couldnt the kid see the pirate movie? Because he didn't have eyes.

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

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Why are there cookie's in the jar? 'Cause I put cookies in the jar

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Why was the Blonde Crying? -because she had just witnessed her infant get sucked through a jet engine and was very sad.

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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Why did a mass amount of people move to Florida? They came to murder their children and get away with it.

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How do you get straight A's? Try really hard throughout the school year and when it comes to the exams study enough to ensure you understand all the material, but so so much as to compromise your sleeping pattern, and in turn, your performance on the day.

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She likes her sex like she likes her penises. Without a woman.

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what do u say to a man walking down the street nothing, u shouldnt talk to strangers

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What do you call a black man in court? A lawyer.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your entire family died in a car accident

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Q. Why did the boy fall off the swing? A. He had no arms or legs. Q. What did he get for Christmas? A. A drumset Q. Knock Knock Who's there Not him

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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What's worse than having to listen a song from Justin Bieber? Being wrongfully convicted of child molestation,rape and murder and spending 50 years in prison before being acquited by DNA-analysis.

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A black guy, a Mexican, an Arab and a white guy walk into a room and embrace cultural diversity.

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What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

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If boobs are round. And so are balls. Then i just cant figure out why the sky is blue?

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A priest a rapist and a child molester walk into a bar. He orders a drink

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Throw a brick at him.

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A: How do you piss off a female pilot? Q: Kill her family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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