what did the single guy with no arms get for christmas? porn.

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? His health was dwindling ever since he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer several years ago and this looked like the end.

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

If anybody wants a free RuneScape account, the username is Antbongton and the password is fluckaduck

Knock knock whos there? me oh, cool... well come in.

A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

What do you call someone who is blind and deaf? Dumb.

Whats the most impotent thing to remember when your going skateboarding? A skateboard.

What is wrong with black stereotypes? Nothing! Basketball is pretty fun if you try it!

What's worse than doing the dishes with long sleeves? Finding out your girlfriend's been cheating on you.

why wasnt johnny in math class?....he slipped and cracked his skull on his way there, he is now recovering at the hospital

If you send someone fudge, you should write them a poem with it Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge!

Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

What's white on top and black on bottom? Society

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

8

how do you confuse a blonde? ask if she wants a cake...then rape her

How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

Why did the hipster get burned? Because he was a volunteer fireman.

You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

What is the difference between a mom and a dad? One is a mom and the other is a dad. Why couldn't Fred see the board? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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