What's three times as dangerous than a war? Three wars.

shoe and shoelace. one is meaningless without the other

Why can't Hellen Keller have babies? She's dead.

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

Chuck Norris didn't count to infinite twice. He can't even do it once.

There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

Jim: Why did the chicken cross the road? Bill: Why? Jim: To get to the other side! Bill: I don't get it Jim: It's an anti-joke, because you expect a punchline but there is no punchline, you get it? Bill: Hold on, let me tickle myself.......oh okay now I get it hahahahaha!

Whats the worst part of having a Birthday on Feb. 29th? You only get facebook birthday wishes every 4 years.

Whats the funniest part about 911? Over 1,000 People Died

A man is in the desert and he finds a lamp, he rubs the lamp and out comes a genie! The genie says "I can grant your three wishes, for releasing me from the lamp" The man says "I wish I didn't have AIDS".

Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven was a creepy movie, and it gave Six nightmares.

What did the very inquisitive poor black guy say to the very rich white man at the train station? Nothing, they didn't know each other. And they both had their iPods in. And they were at different train stations. And they were in different countries. And the black guy died 20 years ago.

Why is jim gay? because he likes men

What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

Why did the man leave anti-joke.com? Because he realized that it was time for dinner and the ham was burning.

Q:What do you call Black Jesus ? A:Black Jesus a.w. j.p.

A: What do you call a Jew with only one arm on Christmas? B: An amputee.

women's rights

A Guitar is an instrument. As far as you know...

the comment about daniel was fron brock

what does a blonde say when she walks into a bar? ouch

A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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