womans rights...

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a man ran into a bar screaming. he now has a severe coma

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Why did the Romans conquer everyone? They were power-hungry.

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How did the bald lady die? Of cancer

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Well, first of all, what I have overcome both mentally (trauma) and physically (lots of shit) is in the past, lets leave it there. Second yeah, I can basically shift my sense of left and right at will, meaning I can choose which arm to write with, and write things mirrored without even thinking about it, I can fool my senses basically, one second I struggle playing the piano because I have just trained with one, then I make my brain believe I have been practicing with both, its simple, but complicated to explain, while my ears are perfectly normal, I got two sets of balance nerves, it just gets more complicated from there.

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

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Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

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What did the girl get for her birthday? Nothing...cause she died

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Roses are red Violets are blue This font is black You smell like shit

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Knock Knock Who's There Your doctor... You have Aids

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What do you call a mexican riding a lawnmower? Promoted

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Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Due the limited cognitive ability and a lack of critical thinking skills, the chicken mistakenly ventured across the road in search of grain. Luckily the chicken was not injured on this occasion, however other chickens may not be so lucky in the future.

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amy baked 35 sugar cookies and ate 25, what does she have now? diabetes.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? A bike that his father paid for with the salary he made as an accountant at a local bank.

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What's big, and fat? Well, duh an elephant.

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Q. why did the chicken cross the road A. damn it this joke is a million years old shut up

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Why are you angry dude? I can't see my forehead

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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HAHA SO ONE TIME... The man could not finish his story because he gets shot, and is mourned for years. His daughter was watching it all. She then jumped. And fell. And broke her knee. And then died. yeah

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Why is McDonalds bad for you? Because their is so much fat in all its products, and contains many calories.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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