A boy asks his father how babies are made. The father responds, "Babies are created via coital sex. A man rhythmically inserts his erect penis into a woman's vagina until he ejaculates. If his semen successfully fertilizes her egg, a baby will slowly grow in her uterus. After roughly forty weeks of gestation, the baby will be born."

What did Mambo say to Jumbo? Nothing. Because they weren't friends.

Q. What's worse than 9/11? A. That one shark jumping episode of Happy Days.

my mom died because she was morbidly obese

Do you want to hear a joke? No. Women's- oh, okay.

Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob Bob What What the hell are you doing here

Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

Where did the Jew put his money? In a low rist, interest bearing mutual fund.

what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No

roses are red violets are blue pornhubs down your mums facebook will do.

yfygcugyuyc

What is green, dangorous, slow, defencive, and scared? A turtle with a uzi.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personalities So do I

What's the difference between a cake and Jews? A cake comes out of the oven.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

What's the richest fish in the sea? The one you threw a quarter at.

So there were two... sigh... I hate my life....

What happened to the girl that thought she was a mermaid? She drowned, humans can't breathe under water.

Q: What's blue and fuzzy? A: Blue fuzz

Roses are red Violets are blue If i gave a rats ass I'd worry about you

Whats the square root of pie? Pies are round.

Knock Knock... Who's there? The FBI, you're going to jail. Really? No.

Why is that man such a perv? I don't know. Ever since I let him see my boobs, he has had this undying obsession with sex. So, I guess that, as society would classify him, he is a sex addict. He will do anything for it, even if he needs a man to get it. I feel terrible about starting his obsession, and plan to take him to therapy next week for the sake of his health.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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