How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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whats pink, brown, and smells like a banana. monkey vomit?

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What's 1+1? 4.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor

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Q: What sound does a baby make when you put it in a blender? A: I don't know; I was too busy trying to find my camera.

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angelo snyder is not ga

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Why did the girl have an abortion? Because she wanted a burger.

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What happened after Will Ferrell took a dump? He wiped his ass and flushed.

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Why did The chicken cross the road? To get ran over.

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Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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What do you call a black man who lands on the moon? An astronaut...f*cking racist.

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Why was the jewish boy crying? i lied he was happy.

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What do you call a horse with no legs? Useless.

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Q: What's the best way to satisfy your hunger A: Eat

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Do you think the death man heard the one about, oh wait I bet he didn't

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Why didn’t the skeleton go to see a scary movie? Because skeletons don't have eyes, and can not watch movies.

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

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What's worse than getting a divorce? Nuclear warfare

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Y2K

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A man walks into a bar. He backs up, unwraps it, and enjoys its chocolatey deliciousness.

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Haiku's Are Easy. But Don't Always Make Much Sense. Refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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