hi

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Why did the man ask the woman on a date? They were both single and looking for a unique, romantic experience that could possibly turn into a long-term loving relationship.

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What will happen if your heart skips 10 beats? Nothing. You're dead.

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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What's poor and lives in Newry city council dump? Smelly mcD

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No, you would have made me unhappy and yourself miserable, until you truly value who you are, as we that still look up to you to this day, you wont see the greatness within you.

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What do you say to a very ambitious dyslexic child? You're ambition is inspiring and I encourage you to follow your dreams. Some of the worlds greatest people, including Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, and Winston Churchill were dyslexic. Your drive is much bigger than your disorder.

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why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

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A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

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whats black white and red all over an abused child

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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What is worse than getting hit by a car? Getting hit by a truck

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How can you tell a baby lost it's voice? It doesn't scream when you staple it to a ceiling fan and turn it on.

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My aunt said slow and steady wins the race....... She died in a fire

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Why did I put the baby into the blender feet first? So I could see its facial expression

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What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

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why was the dog barking?? bryan is a douche..... get it troupe.

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Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

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Bear walks into bar and says to eagle may I have a................... drink eagle says why the long pause hohahahohahahohaha

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How far can a baby fly? As far as you can throw it.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin get in the car.

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What do you call a person with no eyes? Blind.

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There are two muffins in the oven. One muffin says to the other "phew it's kinda hot in here" the other muffin says "AWW a talking muffin!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops