What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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Anti jokes gives me cold sores

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What's the difference between 6 and 7? 1.

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If life gives you lemons, you shoud be thankful it didn't give you AIDS.

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why couldnt the man dunk? because he was 3' 2" and a legal midget.

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what did the palatiespussy say to the asain how many cocaines did i say was a black pankakkkke MMMFUUCCK NORDSTRUM(CUM)

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A chicken walks into McDonalds. He never comes out because he got grilled, greased, and seasoned.

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A blind man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at the man for a moment, then asks : - Excuse me, sir. Are you blind ? And the blind man says : - Yes.

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A blonde, a brunette and a red-head find a mirror with a message on it that says "Stand in front of the mirror and say something you think is true. If it is true, I'll grant you a wish. If it is wrong, you'll be sucked inside the mirror and be trapped there forever." The blonde, who is standing in front of the mirror, says "I think this is a stupid joke." and nothing happened.

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What do you call a million pigs jumping out of an aircraft? Bacon.

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Poop.

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What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One you can smash with a hammer and the other is just a watermelon.

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How do you piss off a female archeologist? Kill her dog.

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Why don't you ever stick your hand into the bottom of the jelly bean jar? Cuz' the black ones will steal your watch

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Roses are shut the f*** up. Violets are shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up.

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What happened when my familys break on the car didn't work? They rolled down a hill and fell off a cliff and died. I loved them.

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Why did the housewife become a farmer? Because the kitchen was burned down in a horrific accident.

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kieran scott peels his off his foreskin while he watches hentai porn then he eats it afterwards, he is also on roids

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why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

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Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

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what do you get when you cross an African with a Rhinoceros? A rhinoceros.

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One time at band camp.............that's it........

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Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

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What do you get when you cross a sheep with a lion? A dead sheep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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