catastrophic anthropogenic global warming

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Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

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Q: what did the poor, blind, deaf, orphan girl get for Christmas? A: cancer.

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jumping jelly beans theirs a snake in my booties,, ooooooo har har ya ya youve got that one thing baby peace love and applesauce baby!!!!1

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What do you call a Muslim on a plane? A passenger, you racist bastard.

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What is the square root of 69? 8.30662386

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What's worse than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What Happens if a Muslim boy gives you a bomb? You give it to someone else as your playing tnt tag and the bombs a toy

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family of four.

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Did I tell you about when I hit a cat with my car? No, what happened? I hit a cat.

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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why did jenny drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock who's there? not jenny.

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what do you call a unicorn crossing a bridge? nothing there fake

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

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What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? a pizza doesn't yell when it goes into an oven

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Once upon a time, The end.

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Roses are red violets are blue I don't know you so get away from me.

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I agree Nero, we agree there, but let me ask you, why did you have the deep desire to create such a society before? You managed to do so as a teen, you wanted to help others, you put them before yourself, you where far more loyal to them, than they ever where to you. What motivated you then to sacrifice so much, where is that strength today?

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What did the cat say when you rub it's stomach? Nothing because felines don't have the needed vocal organs to speak, and probaly wouldn't know english do to the size of there brain.

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An indian boy gets a girlfriend

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what do you call a mexican baptism? a bean dip

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Q: what do you call a hooker you pay in spaghetti? A: a pasta-tute.

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A young cow died of terminal cancer; he said moo before he died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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