2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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What is a cow's favorite drink? Well, I could be wrong and this is just my opinion, but I do not believe that animals experience feelings and, in corollary, favoritism towards anything, particularly regarding basic survival needs, such as hydration.

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man was playing with his little toddler. the man put his thumb through his fingers and said "got your nose" the baby laughed. the cops then burst down his door and arrested him for robbery of personal items. they werent laughing.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

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Roses are blue Violets are red What happened to the gay man? He listened to Justin Beiber And then was straight

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Why is the spine-tailed swift is the fastest bird? Because its faster than the second fastest bird

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How do you kill a clown shoot it in the face

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, and so do I.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a free-range chicken

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Whats worse than having cancer? Nothing....

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How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

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Q: why didn't the asian boy ask for a calculator? A: you don't need calculators to make shoes

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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Q: What do you call a Chelsea fan on the moon? A: A Problem. Q: What do you call 100 Chelsea fans on the moon? A: An even bigger problem. Q: What do you call all the Chelsea fans on the moon? A: Problem solved hahaha Q: What would you get if Newcastle were relegated? A: 45,000 more Chelsea fans

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What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

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What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

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A disabled man walked into a- That can't be right

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Why had the father left his family. Because he was tired of dancing in a circle.

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whats worse than the black death. Bieber Fever

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Why was the 18 year old white male late for his college class. On his way to college he got in a car accident and killed 5 people and he walked away unharmed

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He decided to sail to Portland. He cast off and was never seen again.

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will both fall over after being hit multiple times with an ax.

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Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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