What is black and hanging from the tree in my back yard? A tire Swing.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Im a dog. RUUUFFF!

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Q: How do you confuse a blond A: You don't they are born that way

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What is big, grey and can't climb trees? A car park.

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A Muslim walks into a bar. BOOM

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What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

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What is worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? One baby stapled to 50 trees. What is worse than one baby stapled to 50 trees? One tree stapled to 50 babies.

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What's bad for your teeth? A brick

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I was watching two muffins baking in an oven. One said to the other, "Wow, it's hot in here." The other one said "Wow! A talking muffin!" I went to my psychiatrist the next day, to increase the dosage on my medication.

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Out of all the sadness and death in the world...do you know what the worst part is? Mexicans are still hoping the border...

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A man became infected with Staphylococcal Food Poisoning. The doctor said, "You only have 24 hours to live." He died 24 hours later.

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how to turn invisable. eat yourself

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a kid walks into a room and confesses to his mother he is gay the mother then repeatedly beats him until he is bleeding out of both ears then leaves him there to think about what he just said.

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. An orange.

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Tyler: Why'd the monkey fall out of a tree? Donnie: who's there Tyler: dude this isn't a knock knock joke...

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What is red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

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What ended in the year 1970? 1969

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Why did the chicken cross the road? She had no purpose.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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A zombie walks into a bar. It was shot by an M16 automatic rifle. The video game had zombies.

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One time Chuck Norris cried. He felt slightly better after the experience, but, unfortunately, his grandmother still died of cancer.

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She likes her sex like she likes her penises. Without a woman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops