I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

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Q. What gets louder as it gets smaller? A. A baby in a paper shredder

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A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

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OGC - tilt your head

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An Irishman, a German, a Jew, and a Mexican walk into a bar...... the Irishman is named designated driver and all four have a safe and enjoyable evening.

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What do you call a fly without wings? Injured and left for dead.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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What's worse than finding out you have cancer? Not much, that would not be so great.

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wtf the enter the following thingie says I am here

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What did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

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why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

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What's worse than a dead baby in a barrel? A dead baby in 8 barrels.

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Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

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What do you call a black man who likes watermelon and fried chicken? Someone who likes good food.

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A man walks into a bar and has a wonderful time drinking with his friends, arrives home at a reasonable time and goes to bed.

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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I came across a woman on the ground and i said what happend and she said... "i tripped"

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A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. A farmers walks by underneath, and the squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because squirrels can't talk and neither can owls. Then the owl eats the squirrel because it is a bird of prey.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time and Santa Claus is a very jolly fellow who brings gifts to the homes of the good children during the late evening and overnight hours of Christmas Eve.

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Why didnt the cannibal like the taste of the comedian? because the comedian smelled very bad and the cannibal forgot to add salt.

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what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

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If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

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"You know what they say about people with big swords." What do they say? Man that's a big sword.

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why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get me ball back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops