What's brown and sticky? Turtle excrement.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was the little boy sad? He tried to dry off his puppy in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

thumb_up thumb_down +63

How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

thumb_up thumb_down +90

Whats the worse than dieing of cancer, dieing alone and having AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Before Super Mario existed what did people play? Instruments.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Wanna hear a joke about a baby with AIDS? It never gets old.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

hey i just met you and this is crazy i have alzheimers hey i just met you

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is black and hangs from a tree in my backyard? My neighbors children.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you please a black person? Shower him with love and affection.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I used to be an adventurer like you, Until I lost both my arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

This made my day: The Japanese verb "to drink" is "nomimasu". [L]

thumb_up thumb_down

Jason Connor.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Who hangs out with a girl all day every day while he's dating her for 4 months and still doesn't get his wiener touched. Adam claypool

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is the first thing you should do when a person is choking? Make sure the person is choking How can you tell if a person is choking? If he's going like this: aaghh gaghhg agghhh gaghhhhh ghghaghghgh

thumb_up thumb_down +2

lol a man is drowning

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you get when you cross a chicken and a turkey? Just a sort of mixed bird thing.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the devil say to the baby with four arms? I am evil.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you do if there's a black guy bleeding on your lawn? Help Him

thumb_up thumb_down +1

a blond, brunette, and red head all walk out of a hair salon.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

3 guys were caught trespassing in a field and were sent to jail. The cop asked the first guy, "What were you doing in the field? He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop asked the second guy, "What were you doing in the field?" He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop then asked the third guy, "Lemme guess, you were blowing bubbles too? The guy replied, "No silly, I am Bubbles!"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

have you seen hellen kellers new treehouse? no well neither has she

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What is black and likely to fail? A chain smokers lungs.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops