One day three men died. Heaven had almost been full, and he wanted to see who could get in and who would burn. So the first man starts and says "well I just got home from my girlfriends house, she just dumped me. I was crazy mad, and as I was about to eat the pain away, I saw a man hanging off of my porch. I ran to the man pulled out a sledge hammer, and then smashed his hands off the balcony. And without thinking I picked up my refrigerator and threw it down at him. But sadly I fell with the refridgerator." the second man steps up and says.. "I was doing my dance routine on my porch, and I slipped on an ice cube and flipped off the rail. I took ahold of a railing on which I could puulmupmtomsaftey on, but as I was about to save my own life some psychotic man comes out with a sledge hammer and bashes my hands off the railing. After he threw his refridgerator down at me." and then the third guy says..."well I was in this refridgerator........."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He didn't he was chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -3

In which state does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what did the old man say to the older man? "hey".

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's orange and rhymes with a parrot. A carrot

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is the good thing about having sex with KL..... Nothing because she is a fat man

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

thumb_up thumb_down +21

whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

thumb_up thumb_down +23

3 men in a boat One day there were a American, Mexican, and a Chinese men in a boat. The Chinese man threw over a fortune cookie and said we have to many of these in our country. The Mexican threw over a taco and said we have to many of these in our country. The American threw over the Mexican and said we have to many of these in our country. The End

thumb_up thumb_down +3

whats white and big and white? alot of things...

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the blonde say when she saw a tan button on her calculator? That must mean tangent.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was the wife not in the kitchen? The husband's gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

whats worse than your brother dying in a car accident? finding out the rest of your family was in there

thumb_up thumb_down +26

The BCS

thumb_up thumb_down +13

TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A white guy, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a Hispanic guy walks into a bar. The white guy orders a beer, the black guy orders a shot of vodka, the Asian guy orders a sake, and the Hispanic guy orders a shot of tequila. They were drinking and having a great time.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A walks out of a bar and the joke is cut off by a-

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do a fish and an eagle have in common? They both live underwater aside from the eagle.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: How do you fit two beluga whales into a mini van? A: You don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops