How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

What's blue and smells like pee? Pee, I lied about the color

96 right now there mad at each other but pretty soon it will look like this 69

What do you call a man with an Eye patch and no arms? Names.

why did the Japanese boy drop his ice cream ? Because he was hit by a building.

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

call me maybe.

What's the worste part about alzheimer's disease? You forgot you have AIDS.

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

whats worse then biting into a worm and finding an apple??? getting raped up the butt by a giant tiger!

Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because the weather report said there was a 90% chance of rain, and he didn't want to get his posh new coat wet on the way to the studio

Whats worse than bad sex. Being nice raped in the anus by a teletubby.

The WNBA

Why couldn't Bruce drive a truck? Cause Bruce was a Fish.

Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

what do you call a cross between lasagna and a human. weird

What did the unicorn say to the horse? I have a horn and you don't.

Peg leg Pete, yay, I know stuff too, I watched that one all the time when I was a girl.

Roses are red, Violets are blue Poems don't have to rhyme

Why was Sally gone for her father's birthday? She went on a camping trip with her friends. Sally's friends were brutally murdered and she was kidnapped. The kidnapper cut off her arms and legs and left her in the middle of a suburban intersection late at night. The autopsy revealed that Sally died from blood loss from losing her limbs. It also revealed that she had contracted a fast growing tumor in her brain which would have most likely killed her within days of the murder anyway. Her family was living in the country illegally so her DNA did not reveal a computer file of her person. Her parents were not informed of her death for years because of this. When it was determined that the victim was the parents' daughter they were arrested for living in the country illegally and were not able to have a funeral.

why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A girl who really needs to see the doctor.

what have big boobs, and fat ass ? fat man

this is a joke

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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