A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

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What did one cancer patient say to the other? Nothing, both of them were dead.

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Why did the old lady have a heart attack? She got raped by a giraffe.

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What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas, therefore nothing

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Why was Johnny so mad at his father? Because his father had a constant drinking problem and was very abusive.

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A man walks into a bar. He asked the bartender if he accepts $100 bills. The bartender says "no".

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what is sticky and brown?a stick

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Where is the bathroom, I need to go poo.

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What do you call a man in a pool with no arms and legs? Bob

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Why didn't the cat play with the ball of yarn? It was drowned in a toilet.

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What do you call a gay on steroids? Noah Zimmerman!

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How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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A Jewish man walkes into grocery store. He buys some groceries, and leaves.

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Asians

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what did the fat guy say to the girl ill make fun of you because i have bigger tits than you

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A black man in a hooded sweatshirt is sprinting down a back alley. He is trying to get into better shape by exercising and knows a shortcut to his house.

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your friend: i did ur mom you: jokes on u my moms gross friend:.....

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, the holocaust didn't actually happen, besides I hate jews

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What do dead people think when they die? Nothing,they're dead.

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Bloody kids ...

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Roses are red, violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo. Don't you worry I'll be there too, not in the cage but laughing at you.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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