a blond applies to college she gets in because she did well in highschool

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Hello, I'm David and I just stabbed my aunt in the eye. Just kidding, my name isn't David. That was an Aunt Eye(anti) joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

PENIS

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: What do you call a man driving a van with a bunch of stuff in the back that doesn't belong to him? A: A delivery man

thumb_up thumb_down -22

You: Want to hear a joke? Person: Yeah You: Me too

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I'm getting tired of nazi jokes. ANNE FRANKly I'm quite offended

thumb_up thumb_down -3

how many weasels does it take to change a lightbulb 0 weasels are animals and therefore are not capable of changing lightbulbs

thumb_up thumb_down -1

uhh i dont feel like writing a joke

thumb_up thumb_down +20

When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time

thumb_up thumb_down +51

I have no joke. u mad?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A dyslexic man walks into a saloon and asks for a hair cut.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

EVERYONE NEEDS TO UNDERSTAND!! DYSLEXICS ARE TEOPLE POO!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? No. Yeah, he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

knock knock whos there the game _______I LOST THE GAME_______

thumb_up thumb_down +68

how many jews can you fit in a volkenswagen? 2 jews in the front 2 jews in the back 15 jews in the ashtray

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the boy wearing pyjamas? It was his bed time.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Yo mama's so fat. PERIOD.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A black man walks into a convienent store, pays for his stuff and leaves

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish.........That's a government lake. You're under arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

When is a Jew the sleepiest? Depends on the time really... some people sleep and wake up on different biological calendars.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Suzie has no arms and no legs and is on a swing. what happened? she fell and died knock knock whos there? not suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

ert

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is worse then finding repeated jokes on anti jokes? finding a womr in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops