How did the blonde die raking leaves? She fell out of the tree!

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whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

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What do you call a fridge? A Fridge

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I scream! You scream! - You've Just Been Rapped

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Why couldn't the dinosaur sing? Because dinosaurs are extinct

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why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad. salads can't fly planes.

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Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

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whats worse than 2 jews 3 jews

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what did one toilet say to the other toilet? i would love to flush u

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

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A middle-aged white woman is walking toward a building, talking on her cellphone to a friend. She says, "Yes, I can meet you for lunch in a few hours. I have to go to the unemployment office to sign up for benefits. It's going to be horrible. It'll probably be full of black people." Standing in line, she is incredibly uncomfortable and horrified, because there is a black man right behind her, and she is stuck standing next to him for a long time. Finally it's her turn, and she steps up to the counter. The clerk asks her, "And what did you do for a living?" She answers, "I mopped the floors and cleaned the bathroom in a Blockbuster store that closed down." The clerk says, "Fill out this paperwork and take it to window #2." As she turns around, she is once more repulsed by the black man who is standing right there. Now that it's his turn, he steps to the counter, and the clerk asks him, "And what did you do for a living?" He answers, "I was the senior vice president of global strategic development for Eastman Kodak."

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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I once had a friend We had our arguments, and went our separate ways.

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Why was the woman poor at driving? Because she had not yet passed her driving test.

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whats hairy and fat? I DONT KNOW YOU TELL ME RETARD

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Why was the girl crying at the dance? Someone shot her.

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what did the left foot say to the right foot? Nothing, feet don't talk

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I pooped my pants

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Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

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Why did the 18 year old girl take her clothes off? To take a shower

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Wy do boys like big butts ? Cause it goes in easy :.:

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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There are two horses in a stable. They were just talking about the weather and other normal things. Suddenly, the dog ran in. "HELP, HELP!!!" The dog screamed. Farmer Brandy got stuck in the tractor!!! The horses said, "HOLY SHIT........... A TALKING DOG!!!!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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