Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

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What did the man with cancer say to the Holocaust survivor? "I have cancer."

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What's the difference between a murcielago and a dead baby ? I don't have a dead baby in my garage. 8-)

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What was Steve Jobs' favorite fruit? Grapes.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have herpes. If I were you I would get tested.

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What do a blueberry and a raspberry have in common? They are both commonly used in parfaits.

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If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

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What do you call a room full of jewish women with yeast infections? The waiting room of a gynecologists office, potentially in some sort of Jewish district

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What do you call a fat man in a tiny pipe? Stuck.

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What's worse than women's rights? Actually, not much, because women throughout history suffered for too long the hardships of over dominant male figures and deserve the freedoms they have achieved today.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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What do you call a man with no legs? Disabled.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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How old is the old man? Probably how old he is

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What's worse than the holocaust? anti-joke

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what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

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Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and suffered from a self-inflicted gunshot wound in his head, he is being treated by medical professionals

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What do a turtle and a bowling ball have in common? Nothing

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Justin beiber comment if u get it

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There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

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If dropped from the same height, which hits the ground first an apple or a baby? the apple because the baby has a rope tied around its neck

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when does lady gaga wake up? when she dreams about a bad romance

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Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

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What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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