Roses are Grey Violets are Grey lolololol Im a dog

Does that doctor take insurance? No, the receptionist takes the insurance, the doctor takes your blood... Well actually, the nurse does that.

A doctor walks into a bar, he stumbles backwards as he is taking his coat of, and the barman chuckles.

Whats the most common use of a butt plug after school? In the sport of pole vaultIng, the butt plug is the rubber end of the pole that is designed to withstand the force of being planted in a steel box.

Je veux avoir des relations sexuelles avec toi.

why didnt Joe drive the tractor today? Because Joe doesnt have any arms or legs. Why doesnt Joe have any arms or legs? A) Because Joe is a potatoe

How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

a man walked up to me and said someone is dying with long terminal cancer i said who? man replies your cat. i replied i don't have a cat. man says whoops wrong person

haha.

Why couldn't the fireman get over the hill? Because he was dead.

biggest lie in the world. I love you grandma.

What do you call a man with no legs or arms trying to ski? Impossible.

Yesterday I saw a black kid outrun a white kid know why? Because the white kid was a cripple

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

Hoverboards are still not available, and it's already October 21, 2015...

so a jewish man walks into a bar. He looks at the bartender and says...this better be free

I went up to my friend and she said to me, "Foop." I calmly went to the nearest teacher and told her that Susie is having a mental breakdown again

If life throws you lemons Catch them

How do you make someone laugh at a funeral? Laughing gas How do you make someone cry at a birthday party? Tear gas How do you make someone high at a wedding? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - There are many ways to get high in a wedding. Gas is not the only option.

Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

A: Hey ask me if Im a fire truck? B: Are you a Fire Truck? A: No why would you ask that?

There once was a man from Peru, who dreamed he swallowed his shoe. But it turns out his dream was real, and he died because he could not digest a whole shoe.

What happened to the boy who tried to cross the road? He got hit by a semi-truck and died.

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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