How do you make a 6-year-old cry again? Tell him that without further change to the system, he'll end up paying $100,000 for school and then not have a job when he graduates.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them!!!

2 pilots rowed a boat across the desert. How long did it take to reach the moon? Answer: Purple because chickens don't use magic.

Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They're both Tom Cruise.

This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

You know what's cool? Yep.

what happens when a panther and a gorilla fight? i dont know i never seen it before.

yo moma is so poor she cant afford free samples

Q.why did the woman die A.she left the refrigerator door open then left the kitchen

what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

What did the boy with no social skills say to the bully? I KNOW U ARE BUT WHAT AM I

Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

Why were accents created? So when people go to Texas they come back sounding like a D-Bag.

Roses are shit Violets are my dick Guess what I do for a living? Sex with refrigerator monkeys!

my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Can I have... ...a beer." The bartender asks, "What's with the large pause?" To which the bear replies, "I have... ...a speech impediment."

I AM SHOWERING IN THE BLOOD AND ORGANS OF ENDORPHIN RUSH IN ORDER TO APPEASE THE GODS KNOWN AS... ME, MYSELF, AND I!

there is nothing better than waking up to realise that your being hugged by your partner unless that partner is not home

Knock knock Who's there? I Love You! -Harrison

What's the difference between a Chinese guy and a bucket of fried chicken? There are numerous differences.

feminine literature

A bear walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What'll it be." The bear mauls his face off and kills several other patrons before police show up and fire three rounds in it's face.

Two men were walking down the street. All of a sudden, the first man turns to the second and pulls out his hands of 4 fingers each. The second man shows his hand of 6 fingers each. What does this show about them? Together they have 20 fingers total.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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