one morning i turned on my tv

thumb_up thumb_down -27

An American, Mexican, and Chinese men are each asked to throw something off a cliff that they have too much of. The Chinese threw off rice. The Mexican threw off tacos. And the Americans.. Well.. They threw off the Mexicans.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why do people often give Jimmy strange looks? Because Jimmy has Down Syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what did the crippled boy get for christmas? cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

When the boy cried wolf who heard him? Not Helen Keller

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you burn a lot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

I used to be an inventor, but I had other ideas.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Martin Skrtel walks into a bar The bar breaks, Martin then pays for any damages caused

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the black man die? A white man killed him. He was a member of the KKK.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the boy eat for breakfast? Food

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A Muslim walks into a bar. No-one survived the blast.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Arrow to the Knee

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did suzy not eat her breakfast? because i stapled her to the table.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Now heres a boy who can't read. Ngjmhgmgk? MTGKMJHGMjhkmjh(hgjnhgfjhgfj nj nvj vj kvnmg ifh) njki nj jo ncj kgjkfngjfk jkn jkgfngkfn gkn kgfnigkfnmg km kgf kglfn kglf kglgkflnm klnm mklm khlgfpnkmfklnmlk mbk lm klgfnmk gfmkngfnkgfklfknm m k kf mkfl m k gflmgkffmkopfdjtorper srhes hngfdlj;sdnht rktrtnr rdpkng ngngf.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Question:Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Answer:Because she had no arms or legs. Question:What did little Susie get for Christmas? Answer: a bike, and cancer Question: what did little Susie get next Christmas? Answer: nothing, she didn't live that long... Knock knock Who's there Not little Susie

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

thumb_up thumb_down

A Rabi, a priest, and a monk all go to different churches because they all have different beliefs an respect each others decisions.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The homeless man first experience warmth....in Hell

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Reed is poopin

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops