What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Eating mud

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I think everybody should have a penis. Does that make me a bad feminist?

thumb_up thumb_down

what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

thumb_up thumb_down -67

What is brown and sticky? A masturbating Negro.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are red Violets are blue I would love you But you are too ugly and overweight

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why was the little girl sad? An elephant shat on her face

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why did the chicken cross the road............ why dont you tell me smartass

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Q: Why do Jews have big noses? A: Because air is free!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A man walks into a bar and says "hey bartender wanna help me out!" The bartender says "no."

thumb_up thumb_down +23

why did a girl walk down the alley? because her name was alley!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What has potential but is in fact disappointing? This joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was Billy's grandma not around for Thanksgiving? Because she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? No one knows.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well that, my friend, is a good question.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are blue Colton is gay

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was the man's foot hot? Because it was stuck in a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

There was Jew, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a Mexican guy at the store. The store was called Walmart.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

This one time at band camp... I played an instrument and learned to march with the rest of my school's band.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I'm called the! no i wish am I left

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops