Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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What's black, white, and red all over? A white man's bleeding cancerous tumor.

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Q: Whats the difference between water melon and a baby? A: Watermelon is a fruit.

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Why didn't the man cross the road? He was paralyzed.

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You mom is to dumb when she herd about Walgreens she thout all the walls were green

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? You shouldn't eat Jews, unless your a cannibal for which you should seek psychological help.

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What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

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a jewish duck trips over a series of metal corckswcrews and proceeds to die of ADHD the answer is 4

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Hey i just met you & this is crazy but Nia and Goober Made a baby

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Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

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why did the boy have no friends ? Because he lived in a small cottage miles away from any civilization with his overly strict parents who would not let him see the daylight and deprived him of any kind of childhood, he has no social skills and does not know how to interact with other human beings at no fault of his own. he is also dead

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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Why did the father and his son drop their cola? Because a meteor hit and killed all life on Planet Earth.

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whats worse than ur granny dying? uhhh...actually theres nothing is worse

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Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

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What did the homeless man's sign say? It didn't say anything. You had to read it.

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What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

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What do you call a boy with one arm one leg and an eye patch? Names

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Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

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I asked the librarian where to find a specific book. She told me where it was.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my gamertag so party up maybe?

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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If you could eliminate one thing in your life, what would it be ? My ex.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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