What's the difference between celery and a truck?

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I just found out my wife has cervical cancer."

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What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A salad, hes on a diet

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Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

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Saggy Nipples By chan chan

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Have you seen the movie "Gay Men Say No"? Oh yes, that is very insightful documentary on the modern day struggles of homosexuality.

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Q. How many leprechauns does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. Light bulbs don't exist

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Me: You know what's funnier than 24. Friend: 25? Me: No, 9/11

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The doctor said to the boy that a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down. He is diabetic.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 murdered 4 and 5 then raped 10

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ugh good riddance

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68

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven the first muffin turns to the other and says "Its pretty hot in here." the second muffin jumps back and yells "HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

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Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

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Dick Chaney

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Why was six afraid of 7? Because 7 was a terrorist.

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A boy spilt his milk on the floor, and then cleaned it up before his mum got home.

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A man walk into a bar. He then falls down, quickly picks himself up, and continues his life.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Anywhere from 2-8, depending on the size of the vehicle.

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who touched the priests sticky hand? Jake Duncan

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knock! knock! Whos there? Chris Hansen..

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I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I have a pint or two.

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Why couldn't the blonde screw in the light bulb?? - she happened to be autistic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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