How do you get a firetruck to swerve uncontrollably? Shoot the driver with a 12 gauge.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A white, black, and Hispanic man walk into a bar at 2:00 in the morning. Unfortunately the bar closed at midnight, so they were charged with breaking and entering, and were sentenced to 2 years in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Two Irish men walks out of a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man runs into a bar, he is in a coma for 7 years and most likely going to die, of severe brain damage.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a convicted rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he, he's blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

You life story is the perfect cure for insomnia. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down -11

This is hypothetical remember, just examples with no roots in real life events. The problem with your former employee, was that he would easily have played the victim, certain organizations would have paid him a fortune for the intel he had collected, and surely also agreed to let him walk away, and get you and your small (relatively) crack team death penalty on the spot, just like the underground, you would have been branded terrorists simply because certain people would have earned billions by doing so. The wizard would most likely have gone free, as long as he shared every tiny bit of info, then the cops, the feds, would have blamed it all on you for being his supervisor, you would not have survived the ordeal, trust me.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Things i like to do when im bored; chase after ostriches take major dumps masturbate give myself major erections EJ

thumb_up thumb_down -1

how do you know if a fish is gay? you ask it

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the Nazi solider receive on his birthday? A bayonet up his ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because 2.5 million children in the world are suffering from HIV/AIDs.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a boy with no arms and a hunchback? -names

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the man fall down? He got shot

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the chicken say to the rhino? Nothing. Animals can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you get when you mix red and blue? Gang violence.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A priest a rapist and a child molester walk into a bar. He orders a drink

thumb_up thumb_down -28

5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Your mother's so fat that when she goes through rotating doors, the doors rotate around her.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what is red, yellow, green, blue, purple, and violet? Blood i lied about the other colors...

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the Banana say to the Peach. Nothing, they are incapable of speaking because they are fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops