It was Jimmy's 18th bday so his parents let him have the house to himself. He ate shrooms, fucked his turtle, then had his dick bitten off.

justin Beiber is gay. what else is there to say...

Why wasn't the old woman sitting on the porch? Because she got raped by a big scorpian.

Question: What did one lesbian say to the other lesbian at the grocery store? Answer: Will that be paper or plastic?

What's do you call a prostitute in a hospital? A concerned parent.

How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

i'm hard

Why is red? He was just murmured by a phycopath.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems are pointless Refrigerator.

Why did the cat eat himself? He was hungry

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

What's cooler than being cool? An object at absolute zero

What's the difference between Dick Cheney and Obama? When Obama shoots someone in the face it's bin Laden.

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

Why Stevie is silent nowdays? Because he's dead.

What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus? Trying not to laugh.

why did the chicken cross the road? I never got to ask it got hit by a car.

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says, "Boy, it sure is hot in here!" The other muffin says nothing because it is a muffin.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

roses are red leather is black when when god made you he was smoking crack

Two Jewish Rabbis are sitting in a sandbox....

Once upon a time, there was a Y O U M A D and they all lived happily ever after.

You know what's funnier than 24? 25.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...