What happened when the chicken crossed the road? I got feathers stuck in my cars grill

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Im blind

Two olives are sitting on a table. One loses his balance and rolls off. The other calls down to it, "Oh my gosh, are you okay?" And the olive yells up, "No. I just rolled off a friggin table."

Why do mexicans eat tacos? Because they're good

Whats blue, sticky and glows only during the morning? IDK -Lets go Mets

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

Once upon a time there was a girl who was going out with a boy 2 years older tan her. He was 16 and she was 14. Does it make him a pedo? cause everyone says he is.

What did the dog say to the mouse? Cat

What did Obama say to Hilary? Will you be my secretary of state?

Why did Moses part the sea Because it was divisible by 2

I like to use vasoline during sex. I put it on the doorknob so she can't escape.

Where did Ellen go after the explosion? Everywhere

Roses are red,I love the walking dead,but if they kill off Darrell ill watch glee instead

why did the boy get hit by a bus because he dropped his ice cream

What's the difference between a police officer and a green dinosaur? They both aren't cabbages.

what do you call a little girl next to a mexican? a rape victim.

What happened to the peanut who went to NYC? Nothing because he was eaten on the plane

What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree it can hurt you? A pool table.

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

Why was the boy sad? Because he looked behind him and saw a pedophile penis in his ass.

a guy who can fly walks up a hill and jumps off a cliff. his flying power fails him and he dies on impact

Your mom's so hairy, she should go to the barber!

Why did Jimmy through a glass at spouse? Jimmy was an abusive husband who had a tendancy to drink too much.

What's funnier than shooting a moose? The realization that the moose was Sarah Jessica Parker...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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