What do you get if you cross if you cross an overweight woman with a pair of very tight trousers? Exactly that, an overweight woman in inappropriately tight torusers.

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Person 1: Knock knock Person 2: Who is there??? Person 1: ..................................... Person 2: (Opens Door) Person 1: BOO i scared u and ding dong ditched u Person 2: Actually "Ding Dong Ditching" is when a one or more human beings search for a targeted house where they ring the door bell and run to a designated location to hide. After the resident opens the door to find out no one has stayed and waited, they close the door and the human beings quickly run up and repeat the task many as times until the resident finally catches them.

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NA LINDOL BA KAPAG NATALON ANG MATATABA :8

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Peer pressure.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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Breast cancer.

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Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

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What happened when the turkey jumped out of the airplane? It fell.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

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What do dogs and keyboards have in common? Nothing.

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What do you call a man with no legs and no arms on your doorstep? Matt

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Why was the pirate not allowed into the movie? tickets were sold out

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Have you seen the new Spiderman movie yet? No, Uncle ben hasn't seen it either.

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What do you say to a black guy who is holding a gun to your head? Nothing. He is holding a gun to your head.

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Why is brennan goldade such a loser? Cause he likes men

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why did the chicen cross the road? because it saw an excellent deal on hair products on the other side of the street.

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What did the church say to the house? You need jesus

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What's the difference between girl scouts and boy scouts? Girl scouts are usually females and boy scouts are usually males.

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Why cant penguins fly? because they cant

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Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

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What's the Capitol of Washington dc? W

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Is maynaise an instrument?

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A man ingested a hamburger. It proved fatal due to a tomato allergy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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