Does this napkin chloroform?

What's worse then 10 babies nailed to 10 trees? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

How many jews can you fit into a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and a thousand in the ash tray.

Where do cows get cultured? They don't, they get slaughtered first.

I wanted to burn some calories, so i lit a fat kid on fire

A man walked into a bar. Too bad he didn't see it.The man was sent to the hospital 2 hours later when a friendly elderly lady found him badly wounded on the ground.

What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

Why did the blonde jump off the bridge? She was clinically depressed and wanted to end her life

Q: Why was the little girl cowering in a closet in a corner. A: Because there was a murderer/rapist in her house with her oarents gone.

I tried to call my friend in Haiti. It went straight to vibrate.....

have you seen the movie, Constipated? Never mind, it hasn't come out yet.

A man buys some expensive lingerie for his wife on the occasion of their 10th wedding anniversary. After a lovely candlelight dinner at home, he tells her to close her eyes at which point he retrieves the gift box containing her anniversary present. Thoroughly exited, she rips open the box and takes out the beautiful garment, holding it up to the light in wide-eyed amazement. Her husband gives her a suggestive wink and says "would you like to join me in the bedroom to try it on?" To which she replies, "I AIN'T YER WHORE!"

Chuck Norris gets punched in the face.

Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

A mama cow was sitting in the barn with her 3 babies. The first baby cow goes "Mom, why did you name me Daisy?" "Because a Daisy landed on your head when you were born" The second calf goes "Mom, why did you name me Rose?" "Because a Rose petal landed on your head when you where born." The third calf says "Aasdfghoiuytfghjkuiy" The mom replies "Shut up brick"

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

How do black people vote? They go to their polling place, register, then vote for their candidate on election day.

A black gay transvestite prostitute was walking alone through a dark alley one night. Business has been slow tonight, and she is looking for anyone she can find. Suddenly a man jumps out from the shadows, and brutally kills her. What do you call her? Marsha, as such was her name.

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? -slavery

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass.

Q: Whats The Difference between Batman and Blackman? A: One can go to a store without Robbing it...

Whats worse than forgetting your first homework assignment of the new school year? Being hazed on the first day of school to the point where you seriously consider suicide

What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

A black man walked into a bar. He cashed in big on workers comp.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...