Q. How many Jews can you fit in a car? A. Four, I drive a Volkswagen Jetta

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Why did a boy fall off the swing at a playground? He did not have any arms.

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Why didn't the Baby wake up? Because it was dead

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Batman and Robin are about to get into the Batmobile. What does Batman say? "Get in the car Robin."

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Ones fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other one is a watermelon.

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Q: What is white, and comes out of a woman? A: No, milk you perve

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i bought a sock i wore it i bought a fish i killed it i bought a human i ate it IM A CANNIBAL

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1-1 was a race horse, 1-2 was one too, 1-1 won one once and 1-2 won one too

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What's the difference between Lady Gaga and the Bogeyman? Nothing.

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What's the difference between 2 flies? Their DNA

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A shark walks into a bar. The bartender asks someone to call animal control to remove the nearly-dead sea creature from his bar.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Presents.

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Haikus are easy They are simpler than you think Just don't run out of...

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What is black, white, red and blue? ..... A cow dressed as superman.

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Whta's the difrence betwen a goat and a hors? The goat goed too eet the hors thre day ago!

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why couldnt the man dunk? because he was 3' 2" and a legal midget.

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3 blind mice walk into a bar. they have no idea of their surroundings and are quickly crushed to death.

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

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I like big butts and I cannot lie. You don't know that. I may enjoy skinny butts. I may be lying.

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How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea lives for around 5 minutes in hot water.

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Why didn't Fred answer his phone? Because Fred is a tree.

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what kind of sex did ethan have? webcam sex

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What is the only thing worse than being a smelly Jew in 1944? Being a Jew in 1944 to hit the showers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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