What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

Roses are blue, Violets are red, Pansies are green, I think I'm colorblind

follow @nils_kosmo on twatter hehe

How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

Your mother is so stupid, she is unable to uphold a steady job and cannot support you financially.

P1: why did the chicken cross the road? P2: to get to the other side. P1: Knock! Knock! P2: whos there? P1: THE CHICKEN!

What do you call a black man with a job? An employee

A teacher at a school in America is writing on a chalk board. He asks the class what 50 - 20 is. The teacher begins to become impatient when noone put their hands up. This is because the school is an educational facility for asylumn seekers from Rwanda and all of their hands were cut off by a Warlord.

what will hit the ground first an apple or Obama The apple, obama was stopped by a rope

Whats the difference between a hoover and a harley? one is a vacuum, and the other is a motorcycle.

A Cadillac Escalade ran off a cliff with 4 black man in it. What's wrong with this? The Cadillac could hold 6 people.

Q: Why can't dinosaurs talk? A: Because they are all dead.

Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

Why was the boy walking in circles? One of his feet was nailed to the floor...

A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

Why did Hitler go to the hospital? Because he shot and poisoned himself.

Q: Why's everyone afraid of Friday the 13th? A: Justin Bieber's movie comes out.

Roses are red. Violets are beer. Kay eckelkamp is in charge here.

Hey hey what did the bald man say to brian moccia? lOL!

What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

Your mama's so fat that she killed herself because she was so depressed about her weight.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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