What's even worse than getting a parking ticket on your birthday? Child molestation.

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What's black and crawls around on eight legs? An octopus that just inked itself.

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Hey there, I like bananas! No you don't.

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Where does Hemech take a shit? The toilet's ass

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How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

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What do lazy asses get for Christmas? Fat

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What's black and red and can go through time. I don't know but you have cancer and are going to die very soon.

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A black woman sits down in the front of a bus.

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Why did the black guy die... Herpees he didn't practice safe sex

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What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

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did u hear about evan porter going out with his computer of course not because u haven't read this joke yet

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-What's the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage. _________________________________________________________________ -What's the difference between 1,000 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't use a pitch fork to move my Lamborghini.

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Mary- Hey Dallas, do you have a suitcase? Dallas- Yeah, why? Mary- I need a suitcase

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A Jew man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a lamborghini? Dead babies are not sports cars

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roses are red violets are blue bullets are lead now i shoot you

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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What do you call a middle-aged man at a preschool? A teacher.

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Hi poop!

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What do you say to a black man who is in your house at night-time, carrying your television? Sir, may you please put down the television as it belongs to me and I worked hard to earn the money to buy it. If you do not I will have to contact the authorities to deal with you in a correct and fair manner.

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I JUST HAD SEEX! How blantant, eh?

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why was the guy crying at the bar his house got bombed

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What's taters, precious? The potato is a starchy, tuberous crop from the perennial Solanum tuberosum of the Solanaceae family.

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How many lollipops does it take to shingle a dog? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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