Yo mama is so fat, she lost in a race to a person who had less physical mass.

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What do you call a black man that sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

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If a tree falls on a woman and there's no one around to hear her scream why did a tree fall in the kitchen?

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Bob: "Did you eat my sandwich?" Alex: "I am your sandwich."

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why did the chicken cross the road Kill yoself

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why did billy fall on the sidewalk? he got stabbed

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Q: What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? A: Not struggling with a debilitating mental or physical handicap.

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Why was the black man scared of the chainsaw? Because his father was killed by one when he landed on it when he fell of his ladder that was holding him up while he was cutting the limbs of a tree.

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How do you make a Flamingo cry? Hit it with a sledgehammer.

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You cannot invite, hire people for money and expect loyalty Red, you need to make them earn the right to work for you, merits, background checks, consistency, friend, I can help you with a lot of my own experience, what saddens me about you being the leader, is that you have a good heart. And you are naive, a dangerous combination, if anyone such as Jonas shows up again, your life may be in danger, I mean you know who I am talking about.

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Roses are red violets are blue, your library book is overdue, and if you dont pay the fine...i'll punch you in the mouth.

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

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What's worse then having Casey Anthony babysit your child? A girl asking, "Is it in?"

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Myspace

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I'm not unemployed. I'm on sabbatical. Hey! Don't get all religous on me.

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what did the dog say to the cat? bark what did the cat say to the dog? nothing it ran away

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what are you called if your really funny but you not smart? the class clown

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100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

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there are three girls one said daddy why is my name rose because a rose fell on her head when yur a baby. daddy why is my name feather because a feather fell on your head when your a baby mumamhama, SHUT UP CINDER BLOCK!

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i heard something so funny it made me crap my pants you were a mistake

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What's the difference between black and white people? One is black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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