Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's usually in a good mood.

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all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

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a Gay Man Walks Into A Bar And See's its Only Women In There, He Screams And Leaves

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Is it a bird, Is it a plane, I don't know what it is but it's heading straight for the World Trade Centre

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What do you call a black person born in America? American.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

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When a fat lady walks by what do u think? R u fat or pregnant

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What's worse than finding a spider hidden in your sheets? The spiders being followers of the devil then sucking out your soul and giving it to the devil while your body gets stretched and you die a very painful death.

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Who is happpier than the grouch about the Zombie Apoclypse? Dora.

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Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

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What do you call a Mexican from Cancun? A cholo.

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What do 9 out of 10 people like? Gang rape.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving in a car. They're on their way to the mall, or something.

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What's worse than finding a Worm in your Apple? being Mauled to death.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was stuck in its coop on the farm. Also, chickens aren't sentient, so they can't reason the same way we do.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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What happens when you give a Jew an iPhone? He says thank you and gives you a hug.

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A barman walks into a bar. He works there.

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Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

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Whats the difference between a jewish man wearing a fedora and glass of almond milk? Ones a glass of almond milk.

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What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

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So I took this girl into my room we got in bed, We got under the covers and.... We had a rather delightful game of scrabble.

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Q: What did the boy say to his mum when he saw a Lion A: Hey mum that's a Lion

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Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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