Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

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Many men trespass on my property to taste my milk based beverages. They insist that it's quality is superior to yours. I could teach you how to make such milk based beverages, but I would have to levy a fee.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

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Why did the road cross the chicken? REVENGE

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whats worse than a baby impaled on your lawn... the universe being consumed by a giant albino ape with over sized testicles

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Why did the Mexican mow his neighbors lawn? Because the Mexican was 12 years old and his neighbor was paying him $20 to mow the lawn.

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THE GAME.

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Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit on the back of the bus? All the other seats were taken....

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What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

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A Jehovah's Witness knocks on my door. I didn't answer the door.

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A man from China is learning English and when confronted by a cop accidentally answers each question with one of the few words he knows, impugning himself in the process. The cop, not being a sociopath, realizes that the chuckling foreigner probably has no idea what he has just done and hands him a dictionary to help him cope with the drastic change.

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Ben: do you want to hear a joke. jack: yh go on then, i bet its funny. Ben: Your future.

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yo mama has one big titty and one small titty and the call the bitch paul

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Why did the coconut fall out of the tree? Gravity.

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Who broke into the village's homes and smashed all of the vases? Link did.

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what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

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knock knock who's there? orange orange who? orang you glad i didn't say knock knock agian

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have ADD Check out this flashlight!

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Whats the difference between chris and a party. the locations

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Gladly, you sound very confident, makes me happy. Well, doctors thought I had ADHD (go figure) but I am pretty calm outside the internet, then they went with ADD, but since my attention is twofold, this meaning that I can get a lecture, while noticing a toothpick falling on the other side of the room (noticing as in perceiving with focus not necessarily listening but you know, seeing from the corner of ones eye) Yet still focus well enough to get the lecture in details. So its not split focus such as in ADD, but dual, as in me being able to think about two things at once, but also burning out extremely fast, which again, is far from ADD.

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A man attempts to rob a bank. The police are called and the robber is arrested for attempted robbery.

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Every 20 seconds, a child in africa starves to death... Every 30 seconds, an obese american teen stuffs their face with McDonalds

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Why isn't this joke funny Because i have cancer

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Why can't Dave drive? Because Dave is an orange.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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