Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally Why can't Sally finish her ice cream She has no arms How do you fit Sally into a box? Put her in a blender. How do you get her out? A straw.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why couldn't the boy talk? He drowned.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

roses are red violets are blue im a paki and you are a jew!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you say the weekend in French? The weekend in French.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

No, we got to speak now, or you know, never.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

The world's smartest man walks into a bar. And he orders the best most reasonably priced drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

your momma is so old, she has heart problems

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you make an electrician fall over? You hit him hard with a lamp

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you get a clown to stop smiling Kill him

thumb_up thumb_down +189

I have to tell yo people a story and you have to answer it. Q/S(Story):There once was a boy by the name of aids. He had aids because he had aids. He dad had aids, his mom had aids his whole family had aids. How did he die? A: He got hit by a bus you heartlest basterd.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what is the difference between a park bench and a black guy? the park bench is an inanamite object and doesn't have feelings

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man walks into a bar. The bar tender asks him "why the long face?" He replies "Because I'm a horse, you jackass".

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what happens when you have A.D.D.? you're EXTREMELY annoying

thumb_up thumb_down +10

your life

thumb_up thumb_down +26

a horse walks into a barn

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Life is like a box of chocolates, It doesn't last too long for fat people.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

What did the man do after he rented a movie? He watched it

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the horse escape from his stable? He didn't. He stayed there all night and his owner took him out the next day as the weather was beautiful.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

The World Record For Longest Game of Hide and Seek goes to... Binladin

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what did the black guy say to his friend who was on acid? man you trippin.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's worse than being a Packer Fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... oh, wait....

thumb_up thumb_down +38

How do you make a momma bird not fly back to its nest? Burn it down!!

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops