Why did the chicken cross the road? It had just escaped from the slaughterhouse and ran for its life.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun, Get in the van.

Why was Mr. Smith always so sad at the block party? His uncle molested him as a child, when he was 10 he finally told his mother. His mother and father later fought if they should tell the police, the mother wanted him to go to jail, and the dad didn't want to ruin his family because the uncle was his brother, and the uncle had children. Right before his mother would call the police his father stabbed her in the back, mr smith saw what happened. Him and his father hid his mothers body and mr smith"s dad told him if he tells anyone about this he will kill him. Years later when mr smith was 13 he went on drugs to ease the pain, he later became an addict, and dropped out of school. He know suffers from depression and has killed all 3 of his wives. He is wanted in many middle eastern countries. So when ever he goes to sleep he has the same dream were him mom offers him pot and right before he gets it his dad stabs her in the back. So know mr smith is sad at the block party because he will kill himself later tonight.

Whats the difference between a black guy and a white guy They both have different skin color

Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

What happened when a saxophone hit Sally? She had a concussion.

How do you kill a fox in Canada? Cut it's leg off and let it run!

whats fun,atracks children and says wrape van on it my van i lied about it being fun

Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

how do you find will smith in the snow? with rescue dogs

Try this on your friends and make them look dumb So a plane crashes on the border between the USA and Canada. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury the survivors.

What's Gay and has a penis? Justin Bieber, I lied about the penis

Q: What did the nomad get for christmas? A: Most likely nothing because he lives in the middle of nowhere where no stores exist. If anything, he got a sandstorm.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Becuase the farmer has recently gone blind due to old age and he acidently left the gate opened and the chicken happened to walk out

Why a blonde woman eat vegetables? Because she is a vegetarian.

R: Caught my wife cheating the other night. P: You bitter? R: Yes. I am.

Why was Eight in court? He was involved in Nine's horrifying disappearance.

Roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, oh shit my gardens on fire!!!

Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Obviously not Bob, Idiot What did Bob get for christmas? A glove Actually, I lie. He hasn't unboxed it yet.

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Then the man pays for the beer and drinks the beer.

what happens when you throw a green rock into a yellow pond. it makes a spash.

A straight guy, a straight girl and a bisexual guy walk into a bar. The bisexual guy is twice as likely to find a partner from a purely statistical point of view.

Why so serious? Your brother died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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