Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

Q: Why did Frank have a big horse named Bubba? A: He was allergic to cats

A Mexican, and American, and a Chinese man are crossing the street. They all get hit by a car and die.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure and drugs.

How do you kill a woman? Let her drive

Why was the black man so good at basketball? Because he practiced.

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL

I'd like to make a withdraw

What do you call a cow with big horns? A bull.

Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber's talent.

What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

Q:Why couldn't the baby walk down the hall way? A: It had a javelin stuck in its head.

How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

A man walks into a bar with an MP5 and proceeds to fire thirteen bullets into a crowd of people, several unarmed bystanders attempt to disarm the gunman but they are promptly ordered to stay back or they too would be fired on, a witness reports gunfire coming from down the street to local emergency services and they arrive quickly, organising a perimeter around the bar, county sherriffs decide it would be safest to wait for a swat team, as reports indicated the gunman may have hostages, however the gunfire appears to have ceased an noone has entered or exited the building since police arrived on scene. As SWAT arrives on scene and media helicopters circle above, a person emerges from the bar and the gunman appears behind him, he shoots and kills the hostage and then turns the gun on himself, the death toll reached sixteen including the gunman and as many as fourteen people were injured. there was no clear motive to the massacre, but a search of his appartment indicated he was tired of one-liners on typical joke sites and felt his wife's betrayal with his best friend was too much to bare and he simply snapped after losing his job in the current economic situation.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

Why did the Negro say no to the Aryan? It doesnt matter what he said! thats racist!

4 on three... 1, 2, 3, 4!

read this

Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

Why did Jill fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't Jill get up? She had no legs. Why didn't anyone help Jill up? She had no friends.

What did the squirrel say to the owl? Nothing, because owls and squirrels don't talk, but the owl ate the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

Yo mama so fat she was diagnosed with diabetes and now has to regulate her daily intake of foods.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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