What do you call a black man riding a bike? A hard worker, he saved up his money for weeks trying to buy a bicycle.

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so a mom is like so what you want hunny and the dad goes like you baby bahahahahaa get it?

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Boy: Excuse me, do you have a cigarette? Man: First let me see your ID. Boy: I don't have an ID Man: Well, how much money do you have? Boy: 50 cents Man: Sorry, I don't have any cigarettes. Boy: Good job, I'm actually undercover cop and you sir are a good citizen for not giving a minor cigarettes. Man: Cool, do I get a reward? Boy: Yes, you will receive a good citizen award and free $50 coupon. Man: Thank you! Boy: Can I have a cigarette now? Man: I wasn't lying when I said I didn't have any cigarettes. Boy: Okay, have a nice day.

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Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

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A jew walks into a bar He receives a phone call and promptly leaves

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What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

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Two tomatoes are crossing the road. Suddenly one of them gets hit by a car. He goes "AGH!"

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What's stupid a light bulb.

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What do you call someone in Manhattan who goes to see a Broadway show and then stops in at a local bar for a few drinks? A taxi, if they request you do so.

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Yo mama is so fat!

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Cancer.

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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Knock knock, who's there? Doctor. Doctor who?

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

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Do you have a curfew? No its saturday!

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Stop Iran! We need the money.

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What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

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what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

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What's worse than finding another worm in your apple? Another Holocaust

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom is dead And your dad is too

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What happened to the Jew with a boner that ran into a wall? He broke his nose.

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how do you keep a black kid from jumping on the bed? pick up a parenting book ask him nicely try a time out not care because he's a kid and hes supposed to jump on beds?

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A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

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Hey buddy what's up? I justed wanted to know if you wanted to hang out tonight. Just call me and tell me what you wanna do. Ok that's it see ya. Oh yeah! I gave your mom an STD...sorry dude...it just happened. I hope your dad isn't mad. Again, really sorry. Ok bye.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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