Q Why is an octopus like a tree? A Haven't the foggiest.

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Women's rights

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Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

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why did the zebra cross the road?

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How do you get a baby to start crying? Drop a brick on it. How do you get it to stop crying? Drop two bricks on it.

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What's better than winning gold at the special Olympics? Not being retarded. - Blake Woodman

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FUCK YOU SAY FUCK YOU SAY SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH THATS WHAT I FUCKING SAID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Thank you Jesus, for this wonderful meal we have tonight. De nada.

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Whats worse than one beast thing? Two beast things. Whats worse than two beast things? The holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust? Three beast things.

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How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

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Why did the cow cross the road? He probably saw a delicious looking patch of grass on the otherside.

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Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he was depresed

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Why did the woman pay $5,000 for a gallon of milk? She didn't. She paid $2.99.

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how did the horse fall into the river? he sliped

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they!

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What do you get when you combine High Fructose corn syrup. sunflower oil, carbohydrates, and water. How the heck should I know!

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a man walked into a bar.... when i say bar i mean a metal pole, the man suffered from concussion

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Generally one, however, in cases where the light fixture is unusually high, a ladder may be necessary. Some people like having a second person hold the ladder as they climb it. In this unconventional circumstance, it would take precisely two Jews to change a lightbulb. Also, Jews are bad people.

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Q: Why does Bill Gates give so much money to charity? A: Because he wants to improve the lives of his fellow human beings, and also excessive wealth would be detrimental to his children.

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Hey could I ask you a question? Yes Thanks

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Why was six afraid of seven? The world may never know.

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BUT HWY?

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Why did the Asian eat rice? Because its food

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sausage is brown, and so is my wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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