Q. The square root of 69 is 8 something, right? A. Yes, to be exact it is 8.30662386.

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Q: How many nuns does it take to eat a dead racoon? A: 2

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whats the best thing ever to happen to chuk norris ? he was born !!!!

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What do you call Ed Milliband after he's been decapitated? Dead Milliband.

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Q. bob had 93 chocolate bars and ate 74 what does he have now? A. diabetes

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Why did sally fall off the swings? She didn't have any arms. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally, she doesn't have any arms.

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What's the difference between Mel Gibson and a pineapple? Well at a molecular level, not much because both are made up of atoms.

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Why was the boy at the funeral? Because he was dead.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third guy ducks.

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Riddle me this, riddle me that. I'll eat your f^cking cat.

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How do you wake up lady GaGa? You po po po poker face!

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What do you call a black man and a black woman having sex? A husband and wife who love each other very much and are trying to have a baby.

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A white guy, a black guy, and an asian guy jump off a bridge. Who hits the ground first? It doesn't matter. They are all going to die.

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Q- what did the magician say after the sawed the woman in half ? A- call an ambulance !

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A Jew, a lesbian, and an Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender then cards them and sends them out because they're all under 21.

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what happens when you throw a green rock into the red sea? -- it gets wet

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What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

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What do you call a man with 3 legs and one arm jumping on a trampoline? By his name.

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Knock knock? Whose There? Not Suzie, She can't knock

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why did the man take a poo because his rectum exploded

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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What's spongy and smells of treacle? Treacle sponge

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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