knock knock who's there? pizza man ok

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no

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What do you call an elephant mixed with a rhino? A freak.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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wanna hear a joke? i dont like kids wanna hear a lie? im typing with two hands wanna hear a another? my hand isnt on my weiner

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Yo momma so ugly, except she's not. She's looking beautiful today.

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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What's the best way to make people notice you? Begin a cult that follows some crazy religious division and go on mass murdering sprees, looting, murdering, and raping everything that moves. Your prime targets should be schools, orphanages, and hospitals (maternity wards for bonus points). Eventually, walk up to the FBI unarmed and have them capture you. Then demand that you get interviewed, as you have instructed your followers that if you don't get to speak on public television, they will bomb multiple major cities. When they put you on TV, simply stare at the camera and say: "Senpai. The time has finally come for you to notice me." Then, because you are a cruel, heartless bastard with no morals whatsoever, have your men bomb the major cities anyway. Have fun!

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What's long, hard, and wet? A difficult college exam that fell in a puddle of water

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'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

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What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

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Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

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dead battery come on down

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Hey, you must be a parking ticket. Because you are on the windshield of my car.

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Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

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What did the asshole say to his friend behind him? Fart

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

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A homeless man comes home from work.

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

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What do you call a black guy with a gun? A soldier.

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Whats the saddest part about the sandy hook shooting? There were still bullets in the clip... Im going to hell by the way.

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your mom is so stupid that she is suffering from down's syndrome, and has a shorter life expectancy than normal people.

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what's worse than falling and scraping your knee? living within a 10 mile radius of a Japanese nuclear reactor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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