What is blue and feels like fluff? Blue fluff

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Whats green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A golf course

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm colorblind.

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Friends are like trees, if you deprive them from water they'll die.

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How did the mexicans get to the United States of America? By plane.

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Why couldn't the boy watch the R-rated movie? Cuz he was blind.

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How do you keep black people out of your back yard? Just like you would anyone else: buy a dog.

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What kind of coffee did they drink on the Titanic? They didn't. They all died.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Dave I don't know a Dave, Please leave.

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Who ate the cookies? Your face. Litterally.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is quite strange, but then realizes he is dreaming. He awakes and tells his wife about it. His wife tells him to go to sleep. The bartender is now sad because he realizes his marriage is in shambles

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how much kush does it take to get kushagra high

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A dead guy laying on the floor holding a gun and a knife. What killed him? cancer.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

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You will not press the like button.

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Dick spice

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What's more annoying than dyslexic jokes? Jokes were peopel spel words rong.

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Doctor Doctor i've got wind can you give me something? Thats not wind the doctor replies thats a rare form of stomach cancer.

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Why did the man go to the toilet with his brother? Because Mario and Luigi had to go down in it.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where is my tractor?"

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance cocvered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being deined coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be covered." The man snaps his fingers and says "Damn! I should've voted Democrat!"

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Q: Why is Abu Soooo Dank? A: Because he scores too many left-foot bangers

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whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

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Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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