Why was the girl distressed by the photo of her boyfriend's mutilated corpse? Because it was out of focus.

What do you call nuts on a wall? Walnuts. What do you call nuts on your chest? Chestnuts. What do you call nuts on your chin My dick in your mouth.

Why is Joe white? Because he's white.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It tried to to commit suicide.

one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

A Mexican, a black man and a Pakistani walk into a bar. Everyone immediately runs out seeing the potential danger in the situation that's about to unfold.

Whats worse than being raped? Being raped and murdered.

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

Why did the dog smile? It didn't. Humans are the only creatures on planet Earth capable of smiling, therefore, dogs are unable to smile.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The question just posed is unanswerable, as in order to state the reasoning for the chicken crossing the road, one would have to assume the a chicken has a concept of 'road'. As the chicken is an avant, we can safely say that it has no need of pavements/ sidewalks or roads. As a result, it cannot possibly have an incentive for doing so. Consider the following hypothetical analogy: you are walking in a forest, and you unknowingly cross another animals scent trail. You cannot possibly say WHY you walked across the scent trail, as you didn't know it was there. You can state your reasoning for walking in the first place, but not for crossing that specific scent trail. In conclusion, this question is unanswerable, due to the chicken's lack of knowledge about roads.

4

In what way are a pile of deceased children and a Ferrari F430 similar? Neither can be found in my garage, nor anywhere under my possession. As for the Ferrari, this is an unfortunate truth. Due to Ferraris' high level of desirability, and to their low supply, the cost of one such car is much more than an average person can afford. As for the pile of deceased children, anyone in possesion (for lack of a better term, as one can not truly possess another human being, even post mortem) of such a grotesque thing is probably too sick and twisted to be submitting jokes with no apparent climax in hopes of stimulating the minds of the joke's readers sense of humor.

yo mama is so fat that wii fit puts her in the overweight category

Is your Alzheimers getting better? I have alzeimers?...

a white men said to another white men that someone robbed a bank, it was at night and he wasn't wearing a mask, and also the camera couldn't see him, they now found out that he was black.

what did the deaf kid get for christmas ? An ipod.

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

What's the difference between a battered woman and a regular woman. There is absolutely no difference...

How many jews can fit into a car? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, 6 million in the ash tray

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

What has wings and windows? A bluebird, I was nodding about the windows!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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