What's big white and can't fly? -Half of America Whats big brown and can't fly? -Crap

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana, Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and asked Jill if she wanna. Jill said yes, pulled up her dress, and had a little fun. But stupid Jill forgot the pill, and now they have a son

What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

why did the black guy say he was ridin' dirty? because its been weeks since he last took it to the coin op, he's busy working as an I.T Specialist.

Two white people walk into a bar what do they say? "hi"

What did Jeff do to the bench? He sat on it

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? In this situation, the minority.

I'm hungry.

Zach Murfitt has a small Willy!

What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

A man is mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he reaches down to see if something's stuck in the blades. What does he pull out? His finger.

A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink and then goes home and beats his wife.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: So it could get hit by a car, to prove that chickens have free will, and have every right to cross a road without any particualar reason.

what's the difference between a chicken and a grape? They're both purple........ except for the chicken

Roses are red Violets are blue Theres a crazy ass alpaca ready to take a shit on you

He who laughs last gathers no moss.

What's awesome and rides a unicycle? Rollercoasters. I lied about the unicycle.

autistic kids rock

A man comes home to find his wife sleeping with another woman. He molests them both.

What do you call a gay Jew? I don't know, but Jews are cool.

There are three men in a canoe traveling upstream. One wheel falls off. How many pancakes fit in a doghouse? 9, because ice-cream has no bones.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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