What's the difference between a duck?

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Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkly? Because if they were small, round, and white, they would be called 'asprin'.

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What did the pear tree say to the farmer? Go harvest that corn over yonder.

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why did kermit cry?Ms.Piggy knocked him out on Christmas and he slept through the party and all of the presents

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speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

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[Insert dumb, last minute anti-joke here]

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What do you do when you see a half-dead black man on the floor? Call an ambulance before he bleeds out causing sepsis.

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When my brother was hanging at YOUR cross, he asked "daddy" "Oh father why!" Then lightning struck and the weather went to fuck. Moral: WHAT KIND OF RESPONSE IS THAT YOU PIECE OF SHIT!?

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What happened when the Mexican put the Popsicles in the fridge? They melted

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A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

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how do u wake kesha up? Answer:set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

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What do you call a black person flying an airplane? a pilot you racist

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Q:Whats worse then hard nipples A:The holocaust

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Oh na na not today Oh na na maybe tommrow

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What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

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Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

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What did the Dragonfly say to the Mosquito? Nothing. He ate it.

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5 Italian guys from Long Island

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What do you call a row of houses that are all different size? A poorly thought out construction project that has enraged townspeople.

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Whats he difference between a rock and a dead baby? I'm not spemding the rest of my natural life in an insane asylum for eating a rock!

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What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a women? Sex.

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Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

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Cool Brian

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Albino African Americans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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