How are you this morning?

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I was so fat I went on a diet

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Why couldn't Scruffy get out from under the car? It had parked on his skull.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Good friends enjoying a summer activity.

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What's are the screams and terror when midnight hits? Vannlia Ice's face.

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knock knock, whos there? your neighbor's cat..no not really, but your sister just got raped

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Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

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Diarrhea

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, cause he didn't make it till Christmas...

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What's ugly and has shit smeared over its teeth? Smelly McD (He also wears bin bag clothes)

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Why did the...uhh.... Lamp.

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What color is the orange? Grey, I'm color blind.

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what do u call a black persons face? a black persons face...

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Q) What did the Irishman get for his birthday? A) Drunk

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What did the man say when he saw his t.v. floating in the middle of the night? I must be seeing things. By logic, televisions don't float. My weary eyes must be playing tricks on me and I should probably go back to sleep.

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Q:What do you say to an albino man that will always get his attention? A:His name.

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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Japan

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Blue fish occasionally consume large amopunts of the insides of oak trees.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue In Soviet Russia Poem tells You -Ben

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what do you call a retarded child with a doll in his hand while crying and running up a hill in bell bottom jeans in august at night a block of ice

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find the o 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duh its up top

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rose are red violets should be purple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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