What is black, white, and red all over? A zebra that was shot by poachers.

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An old friend of mine had an idea. "Socks, but for your hands." I laughed until the day I heard he died of chaffed penis.

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Dollar ice tea... I drink that Supa hot fire... i spit that Two and a half men................... I watch that

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges can't talk therefore this is not a accurate accusation.

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Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese lady order a cheeseburger? A: Because it wasn't on the menu

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Roses are red my underwear is brown I just sharted my pants

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A dyslexic paraplegic walks into a bra

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I know Mandarin, He's a good friend of mine

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

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What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Simple poke her face.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt will thank you.

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how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

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Why did the baby stop crying? I hit him with a brick.

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What's funnier than 10 dead babies? 11 dead babies.

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If I crash my car, how many trees does it take to cover my yard in orange juice, yellow, because a cat pissed on my foot.

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You got yourself a mole, I suggest you restrict all access to any and everyone that could possibly go under aliases such as: The Wiz. Azure. Dungeon Lord. Dice. Wizard, and anything similar, he is most likely a computer geek which does not necessarily look like one.

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Q:What do you call a duck that can fly? A:Bird.

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What does a tomato and a human have in common? They both spray red liquid when stabbed repeatedly

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what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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