There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

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A man walks into a bar. He pulls out a knife, shoots the bar tender, and then kills himself.

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How do you make an idiot in suspense?

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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What do you call an animal that is blue, fluffy and lives in the arctic? I don't know and that's why I'm asking you.

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What do you call a zebra eating Cheerios? A zebra eating Cheerios.

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When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

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What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

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What did Justin Bieber say when he felt funny? Wheres my tampon

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What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

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Don't you hate it when you're reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles. _._._

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

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What kind of a prediction is THAT?

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Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

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your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

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Why did the little girl cry in school? Because she remembered her parents were both in prison. She is in a state run foster academy.

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Koalas mum is a slut

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A woman is hit by a car. Thankfully she manages to survive, but the driver is fined a lot of money for speeding.

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is this love , is this love , is this love , that im feeling , no bob im afraid its cancer.

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I took my blind grandmother to the art gallary

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What did the blonde say when she saw a tan button on her calculator? That must mean tangent.

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Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

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Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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