Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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What did the kid say when you gave him a cookie? Thank you.

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I have a black man in my family tree... He's still hanging there.

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ok

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Why did the man have a hole in his head? He was shot.

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How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

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Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

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Why did it take a long time to read the anti-joke? Because of the great amount of space between the question and the answer.

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If you add two 1's together its 11 if you add two 2's together its 22 If you add two 3's together its 33 So what happens if you add 4 and 4? No you dumb-ass its not 44, its 8

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knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

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What do you call someone who is bad at hand eye co-ordination? Dispraxic

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What's larger than a grandmother clock? Plenty of things.

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What did the woman get for Christmas? Cooking oil and a black eye.

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What do you call a car that doesn't work? Broken.

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Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

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one time there was a fukc then it taked a shat potated pancocks cancer is fuCk 18 why did the cock cross the choad? fUcK

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Why can't Hellen Kelller drive? Because she's a woman.

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telll someone to ask u if u are a tree then say nooooooo

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A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for some water. The bartender replies: "Sorry, we don't have any." The man responds: "Sorry, I'm drunk." He walks out.

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Knock Knock! we have a door bell ...ding dong. its broken.

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Why didn't suzie go to school yesterday? She was brutally hacked into pieces and now she"ll never experience school again

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What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

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A girlfriend told her boyfriend it soaked all the way through. She screwed up their art project.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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