whoa there

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What's white and horny? A unicorn

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ecks! why zee?

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What did the Unicorn do with the Portal gun? Nothing. Neither of them are real.

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Your mom is so dumb that she doesn't get this joke

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Why is the post under me so funny? Because the boy won't be able to play the x box!

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A mercenary was sent from the US to kill a terrorist leader. He was captured by the terrorists but wouldn't give away any information. They beat him, shocked him, cut him, and punched him in a dark room with a light beaming right down on him like a spotlight. It was a grueling five long days until they said "We know you have the information we want, tell us or you will die!" The mercenary sat in silence. They took out a gun and pointed it to his head. The mercenary then broke down and told the terrorists the information they wanted to hear. The terrorists then shot him to death.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No-one because that's not feasible.

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your family is so poor that you require healthcare to recieve money

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One man's junk is another man's pleasure.

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whats black? a black man

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Why did the cat cross the road? To see its mom who was lying dead on the other side

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. My mom went to the doctor and found out she has cancer, so when she told me, I was eccentric. That tree is green.

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What day is it? Asked the man with a gun who dislikes music. Friday. Mostly because yesterday was thursday and tomorrow is Saturday. Sunday comes afterwards also. The man says "oh. I thought it was Tuesday."

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why is your mother dead? because i killed him.

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Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

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Why was the black man excited when he found a $20 bill on the ground? -Anyone would be excited

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So, two people park their car and walk into a bar. Wait, no. They were walking into a grocery store and they were riding skateboards, not a car. Then, the kid walks in after them. Oh, did I forget to mention they had children? And also, they're married. So anyway, they walk into this grocery store, and meet a barkeep. Wait no that's ridiculous why would a barkeep be in a grocery store. Let me start over. Bah.. never mind. I forgot what happened next, but it was REALLY FUNNY!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Dead Babies

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Why did the black guy go to jail, because he did illegal stuff.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What do you call batman when we lost all his money? Broke

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What's made of wood and has an eraser? a 2x4 i lied about the eraser.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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