I created darkness. God created the stars. God created the bee. I created the wasp. God created the child. I banged your mother. Moral: Soon my wings of darkness shall destroy your very own star, these words seem empty now, so I will fill them with true meaning and purpose as I will give the same to you the day the sky brightens no more.

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Boy: Hey girl, the voices in my head tole me to come over and talk to you. Girl: ... *walks away*

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How many Polacks does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to change the lightbulb, one to hold the ladder.

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clamidia

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If youre African, why are you white?

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What do you call two black guys flying a plane? Pilots.

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Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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hey guys what's up?

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..

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Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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Your mom is so fat, that when she went to the doctor, the doctor told her she had Type II Diabetes.

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What is the greatest lie ever? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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If you're reading this, you can read.

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Why can't Stuart post a joke? Because he is using a giant iphone

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead...

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What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

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How do you get a small freckly boy to stop watching television. You turn off the television.

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wat do u call a person who is ugly ugly

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What's worse than sitting in a car that's steered by a woman? Sitting in an airplane steered by a suicidal pilot.

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An Irish priest molested many children. He's still free today

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? The 2 nouns in the sentence has been switched.

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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How many babies can you fit in a blender? None, the blender is too small. Also it is illegal to kill a baby infant because they are considered human. You can get life in prison or the death penalty for committing such a heinous crime.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops