how do you get blondes to drown? stick a mirror to the bottom of the pool

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why could the little girl not swim? She had rabies.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What does the average fishermen catch Fish

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: When birds fly in a "V", why is one side always longer? A: There is one extra bird on that side

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How any blondes dose it take to screw in a lightbulb? 3 one to hold the light bulb and two to rotate the ladder

thumb_up thumb_down -37

You smell bad? Cool.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call 4 Mexicans hopping the border? 4 Mexicans in search of a better lifestyle from poverty.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad this joke is over?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Past, Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense...

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Roses are red violets are blue your dads got hair what happened to you

thumb_up thumb_down -7

- What's green and invisible? *holds out empty hand* - This cabbage

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I had a grammar lesson yesterday. I learned how to speak more good.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why could't Jerry go to school on the Wednesday? Because he died on the Monday.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down +66

Knock knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Mike Davis from across the street. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

You will not press the like button.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's the difference between a mexican and a park bench? One is a minority whose ancestors originally lived in the central american country of Mexico, the other is a useful convenience that provides a place to rest one's legs in a public place.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the man sad His got raped

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops