Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

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Why did the old man step on the caterpillar? For fun.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was standing up.

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Dude did you hear of that mexcican who made a succesful living? Yeah. Me too,

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why did I fall off a tree? cause i wanna to

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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What is brown and woody? Brown wood.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is deceased, therefore rendering her incapable of movement, which is required to drive a vehicle.

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What do you call a Simon with no arms and legs? Simon

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Why do depressed people like sharp knives? Cause there good for cutting Salad

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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How did the chicken cross the road? Chickens live in farms, they don't cross roads.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually, 6's fear was totally irrational, and thus unexplainable. This sort of fear is generally referred to as a phobia.

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what would u do if you were having anal sex with a black guy and his penis was sooooo big that it ripped ur asshole? staple it back together

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Thank you for booking with Anti-Joke Travel Agency. Here is your trip itinerary: 1. Your toilet

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Jacob Edwards has friends

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what did the jew say when the arab threw rocks at him? He didnt, the israeli air force proceeded to fire white phosphorous missiles and annihalated many small children and babies in the process, the aftermath is still around today.

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21

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That joke was so funny that I fell off my dinosaur. Then afterwards had to be put in a rehabilitation center because I am schizophrenic and dinosaurs are extinct.

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ive got it ive got ive got outsimers to tonight wow bim bim bub bub za za

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroy his family and career.

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What happens when a black man falls out of a tree? He gets hurt.

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Someone told me once, but i had terrible memory so I had them tell me again.

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So, would you like provolone or mozzarella with that? Yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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