What did the pedofile say to the little girl? Nothing. She was properly supervised by her parents.

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What's the difference between sand and menstral blood? I can't gargle sand

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I like my coffee the way I like Christina Aguilera - I don't.

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A Haiku It Is This One Is Kind Of Boring Now It's Time For Bed

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Why does it take more than one blond to replace a light bulb? Because one had no arms, thus requiring the help of another person. It just so happened that that other person was a blond.

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A dolphin walked into a bar, wait. . . dolphins can't walk, or go to bars.

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a dyslexic boy prays to dog.

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What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

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toast points

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Lololol

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How long does it take a black woman to take a shit? Why in the world would you want to know something like that? But anyway, the answer is somewhere, on average, between 10 seconds and 15 minutes. It really varies and conditions like irritable bowel syndrome and constipation affect this range. Actually it takes about 9 months.

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people magazine

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, well at least they were, until I met you!

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Why did the small child cry? He was forced to dig his own grave at gunpoint.

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What is the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench is an inanimate object whereas a black man is a human being with rights.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? depends on how hard you throw them

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Why was the chair spinning Cause it wants to

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A guy is playing cod

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

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Why did the man eat his wife? He was a cannibal

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What did the man do when he saw there was water spilled on his desk? He waited two hours for it to evaporate because he was too lazy to wipe it up.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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A poor boy receives his first wrapped present in his entire life. Why did he hate it so much? Because it was a copy of "Mien Kampf" Is he Jewish? No, he actually does know what "Mien Kampf" is because he is poor and cannot read.

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Knock Knock Business Man: Who's There? Al Qeada Business Man: Al Qeada who? Al Qeada is flying an airplane into your building Then a commercial airplane flew into the oddly placed door on the 95th floor of the North Tower. That's how 9/11 happened. Have a nice day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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