Q:Why are dinosaurs extinct? A:Well there are two reasons the first being a giant meteor struck the earth killing all the dinosaurs. The other reason you touch yourself at night.

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Dylan Hodge's mother touches her own butthole at night. Joshua Brown's sister rubs Josh's earlobes passionately. Brock is a fag. Jacob is Awesome. Daniel THINKS he's awesome. Jamie kills everyone. Apart from Jacob.

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Why did the cow lay down? Because he was tired

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What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

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The declaration of Independence was singed in? Pen.

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Your mommas so fat that she may die.

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1)Where do you find a turtle with no legs? 2)Where? 1)Where you left it. 1)... Knock Knock... 2)Who's there? 1)...Not the turtle...

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Q: What was the last thing to enter the bug's mind as it flew into the windshield? A: His back legs.

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An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

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I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

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Why did the chicken cross the road? chickens are very unintelligent, and often walk around aimlessly with no purpose.

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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why did the mexican choose to work as a landscaper instead of at taco bell? landscaping pays much better and was a more practical decision in this economy to support his family of 13.

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Why did the hamster not eat it's food? Because it wasn't hungry.

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How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

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Q: Why was the blonde in a black car? A: Becasue the car was a herse and she was killed a week before in an accident where the other driver was drunk Becasue his wife had left him with no money and no kids to come home to.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Shrubs are red, Trees are red, Holy shit my garden's on fire!

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Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

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Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

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a kangaroo walks in to a bar and sits down. Kangaroo's live in Auustralia

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Jesse gives his mom the stick for breakfast

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Three blondes are stranded on an island. They all die from starvation.

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Doctor, Doctor, I can't feel my legs? We're going to have to amputate it to prevent infection, you won't be able to walk again.

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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