Q: What is red and green and goes 100/mph? A: A frog in a blender

What did Harold homeless man get for his Birthday? after several years of a meth abuse Harold lost contact with his family. As a result Harold received nothing but an extra bowl of soup at his local soup kitchen.

Knock Kock Who's there? Boo Boo who The ghost from Mario

ring around the rosie ... your dead

What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

What did the asian parent say to his kid when he got a D? -It's OK son, you will do better next time.

Why did the dog cross the road? He saw a fish.

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? names.

What's the point of going to college? There is none.

And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

Whats the most common use of a butt plug after school? In the sport of pole vaultIng, the butt plug is the rubber end of the pole that is designed to withstand the force of being planted in a steel box.

Why is it nice to wear jeans? So people don't see your undies.

Why could the woman cook for her family? She didn't have one she was anti-social

A Catholic priest has the choice between spending an hour with a young girl or a young boy. Which does he choose? Neither because that's illegal and completely immoral for a priest.

Q: Why did the dead baby cross the road??? A: It was stapled to the chicken.

why did the kitten not eat its food? because its face was stapled to the floor.

What junk did she have in her trunk? Mcdonalds because shes fat as hell.

Do you also think Daffy Duck is really attractive when he dresses up like a woman? Yeah, me neither...

Yesterday, my friend said I should facebook him. So I slammed a book into his face.

How do you get a blonde to eat crayons? Threaten to kill her parents with a hacksaw.

- have you heard about the guy who got the left side off the body cut off? - no. - He died

There once was a man from Nantucket.

stop it ryan vallee

Q: What did the bus driver say to the black man? A: Nothing, he simply greeted him with a nod, as he would do to any other person who chose to ride the bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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