Why do you never hit a black man with your car? Because that's vehicular homicide.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

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What kind of pizza did the world trade center order? Two cheese pizzas.

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Roses are red Violets are blue who are you kidding, violets are violet

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How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

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Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

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what do u call blue fluff? blue fluff

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why did the black man jump off a cliff? He's been emotionally unstable ever since he witnessed the brutal murder of his parents as a child and could no longer live with himself, so he decided to commit suicide.

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a man walked out of church and said F***!

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Haikus usually make sense, but sometimes they don't refrigerator.

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WNBA

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

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What do you call a black guy that steals a car? A father desperate to save his dying son who doesn't have a car to drive to a hospital

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Tomorrow, today's yesterday.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

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How do you get 2x1=4? Do the wrong math.

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What did the one man say to the other man? What? I don't know , I wasn't there, that's why I'm asking.

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So a blond, a brunette, a ninja, a pirate, a priest, a rabbi, a mathematician and an engineer all walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What, is this some kind of joke?"

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So a blonde walks into a wall...

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What is funnier than 24? If you think numbers are funny then you could have a mental illness and that isn't quite funny.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others don't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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