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ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE, WITHOUT MY HEART I CANNOT LOVE YOU

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What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

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What did Tim's grandma get him for his birthday? Nothing, because Tim's grandma died in a car accident 2 years ago

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Yo Mama is so white, people call her caucasian.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, the enslavement of blacks over hundreds of years.

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What did the man do when he went in the bathroom he took a crap wiped his butt and washed his hands and went back to meet his family at the dinner table

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Whats big orange and likes to eat rocks? a big orange rock eater

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John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

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What do you call a girl who can run faster than me? Virgin

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What happens if you fell off a 600 foot cliff? You die.

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Simon says.. Nothing because he's deaf.

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Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

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A duck walks into a bar and buys a drink. When the bartender comes up he says put it on my bill

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A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

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Q: Little black thing with a little red thing on it. What is it?! A: Ant with a broken nose...

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Q: What do you call an anti-joke? A: An anti-joke

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What's 1+1? 4.

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What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

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What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

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Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

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What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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