How does a black chick tell if she's pregnant? When she pulls the tampon out, all the cotton is already picked.

What do you give a small child when you don't have any candy? Nothing, you just kidnap them.

i like going to public parks and watching the kids run and yell because they dont know im using blanks

whats worse than 9/11? 9/12

What happened the the blonde that went swimming? She cooled off and enjoyed a hot summer day.

Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

Predators face looks like what? Pussy.

Why did the mushroom go to the party??? Cuzz he was a fungi (fun guy)

Q: Why'd the guy have to fart? A: There was a buildup of methane gas in his colon.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road A. Because he needed to get to the other side

Why wasn't the crow allowed on the plane? He had too much carrion luggage

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of its legs is both the same

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Why was the mother sad? Because she had just watched her beloved baby get shoved in a blender.

Where is aodhan's ma? Jail, she was cought with a bag full of the white powder.

Justin Littleton's mom accidentally texting him about buying weed, and then offering to buy him ice cream to make up for it.

Half life 3 confirmed

A Brunette, a Redhead and a Blond all jump off a cliff, which one will hit the ground last? Since the acceleration of gravity is 9.8 m/s they will all hit the ground simultaneously and with enough force to completly shatter their bodys making body recovery extreemly difficult. They must have had a hard life.

Two Jews walk into a bar. They promptly order their drinks and leave.

knock knock who's there a black person SHIT!!!!

A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

kieran is a homosexual

Knock knock Who's there? Me. Idiot.

roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme refrigerator

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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