Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the chicken fall off the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

Whats worse than getting an eye gouged out? Getting both eyes gouged out?

I love boobs

Friends are like lettuce; If you eat their head, they die

Two weeks ago, my brother walked into a flea market and asked if they sold fleas. He's so silly.

What's the difference between a cake and Jews? A cake comes out of the oven.

The man was allergic to water. He unfortunately died because water is needed to sustain health as a human.

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

What's black,white, and red all over? Nothing, because if it is completely covered in red then it can only be red.

What did Christopher Colombus say to his men before they boarded the boat to sail around the world? Get on the boat.

What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing really, it just let out a little whine.

knock , knock That Was The Same Mistake That Ann Frank Made.

Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

Two straight men walk into a gay bar and promptly forget why they went to a gay bar when they are both clearly heterosexual.

Why did the blonde become a cannibal? Because she got hungry.

what's red and blue? your heart

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

How do I get to Carnegie Hall? The address is 881 Seventh Avenue at 57th street in New York. it's beside the Russian Tea Room and almost directly across from the IESE school of business. The Russian Tea Room has a large bright red awning out front and a large carving of three dancing bears on the face of the building, the bears are covered in gold leaf. You can't miss it.

You know what the Germans have to say about problems? For every problem there is a final solution.

Who is a knob? ross d

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Im sorry Dylan Hodge Jamie Stegman

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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