Your so dumb, you didn't notice I should have used you're. Don't lie

What did the elephant say to the other elephant? We're both elephants!

Why did the chicken cross the road? ..... he didn't

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The answer really isn't that important.

A man says to a boy. I bet you I can jump over that mountain. The boy wins the bet because it is a physical impossibility to jump over a mountain.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue The mothership came and your did a whole lot of scam

Why did the guy not pet the dog? He was allergic.

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?.

Q. What is worse than being British???? A. Not being British

Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

whats the difference between a battery and a charger

tommy is retared

A mormon walks into a bar. He orders a caffeine free Coke.

what is stupid and reading this you

What do you call 10 old black people in a barn? Used farm equipment

Why did the women cover up her vaginal area? She was with her friends, queefed, and was extremely self conscious.

Why don't traffic lights go swimming? Because they aren't sentient or animate, and therefore can't decide to undertake such an activity. Even if they were sentient, they wouldn't enjoy swimming as the water would damage their electrical works.

Why was Chris crying? There was a robbery at his house and both of his parents were brutally murdered.

What is the difference between therapist and the rapist? A space.

Your momma is soooo poor... I don't know how she is so fat

I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the knee and had armor so it deflected off. Then I found out my wife was pregnant.

Why did the blonde fail her driving test? She was paralyzed and had down syndrome.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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