Hi

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CHEEZECAKE

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Why did the cow puke up his grass? Because it is necessary so that the cow can re-chew his food to aid with the digestion.

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Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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Why was the boy not feeling well? He swallowed a piano.

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Q: What do you call a guy that is smart? A: A SMART Guy.

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A dog walks into a bar, looks at the bartender, lifts its leg and pisses on a bar stool. What does the bartender do ? He chases the dog out the bar and gets a mop to mop up the piss.

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How did the blonde girl get pregnant? Her boyfriend used a condom left in his pants and then was washed. Making it defective and causing her her to become pregnant.

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Why did the 14 year old girl have sex? Because she's in love with her boyfriend and that's how she expresses it.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

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Why didn't the poor man buy a candy bar? He wasn't hungry.

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what do you call an elephant crossing a fish? a elephant fish

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A man is sitting on a park bench crying. A blonde walks by and asks him why he's sad. The man proceeds to explain he just lost his children in a custody battle with his ex wife.

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Q: Why was the black guy afraid of the chainsaw A: It was cutting his arm off

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I love you more than other things that are significantly less important to me than you are

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How do you sabotage someone's car? Drop a fridge on it

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What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

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Why did the virgin jerk until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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Why did the blonde fail her science test? Because she spent all day at the hair salon getting her hair died from brown to blonde when she should have spent the time productively studying.

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What has eyes but can't see? A blind person.

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When do doctors make house calls? When you're sick.

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When Chuck Norris runs, he doesn't even move a muscle.

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I believe if Floyd Mayweather fought Muhammad Ali I believe it would be a close fight but Floyd would win. Because Ali has Parkinson's

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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