Hay is for horses and other hay consuming mammals.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was the school girl called a dork. Because a whale penis is called a dork, and she identically resembles a giant aquatic dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

thumb_up thumb_down -171

Yo Momma so fat, that she need the atlantic to take a bath!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: How do you make a cat bark? A: Douse it in gasoline and throw it in a fire.........WOOF!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A Muslim, a Buddhist, and a Christian are on a plain. They have to jump off for some reason. The Muslim straps a bomb to his chest, jumps out of the plain, and screams "AHLA AKBAH"!!!! The Buddhist jumps out and says save me heavenly Buddha. A giant golden hand catches him and lightly places him on land. The Christian says "aw hell with this" and jumps out, then says "save me heavenly Buddha". The giant golden hand places him down gently on land. The Christian then says "thank god". The giant golden hand comes back down and kills him.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Holocaust jokes are not funny. My Grandpa died in the Holocaust... He fell off of the guard tower.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Why can't women play poker? Because they're freaking stupid!

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Your momma is so fat that she has really high cholesterol but also an undoubtedly warm personality.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was the black man put in jail? Because he escaped.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

DARK FACT: A ratchet black chick would say that was racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

a boy put a blanket oveer his head one night... He was warm for the rest of the night

thumb_up thumb_down +11

roses are red, violets? are blue, Im not good at poems, tits

thumb_up thumb_down +15

'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A. Where was Sally during the boston marathon bombing? Q. Everywhere. www.facebook.com/wowedgy

thumb_up thumb_down -25

So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How you know when dislextic

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a child with a peg leg, and eye patch, and no hand? Names

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call a horse standing alone in an empty field? Tesco's own Beef Lasagne.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's mean to black people? The economy. But, I forgot to mention that it's not nice to whites, hispanics, asians or anyone else.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You shoot at the blonde. Causing her to fall, but I have a feeling she will be pretty mad!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops