man 1.have u sen my girl friend man 2. yes man 1. rely man 2. no man 1. dick

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Whats worse than ten babies stapled to a tree? One baby stapled to ten trees.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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A.M.E.V.A.A A-ny M-essage E-xpressed V-ia A-cronym is A-wesome

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

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Why was Joseph Kony at a primary school ? It was 3 o'clock and his children had just finished a long hard day learning to read and right and it was his turn to pick them up after him and misses Kony developed a schedule one late night after the odd glass of wine or two.

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Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

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Yo Mamma's so dumb... She cannot manage to find a decent job without her GED.

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What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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EVERYBODY has a penis!!! Everybody!!!!

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Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

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i bought a sock i wore it i bought a fish i killed it i bought a human i ate it IM A CANNIBAL

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So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

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What do you call a blonde person? By her name.

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Did you ever notice that if you blow in a dogs face it goes mad, yet when you take him on a car ride he sticks his head straight out the window?

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Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

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What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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Why are black people scared of chainsaws? Because the chainsaws go run nigga nigga run.

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Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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