No pen- no notes No notes- no study No study- no good grades No good grades- no diploma No diploma- no job No job- no money No money- no food No food- really skinny Really skinny- ugly Ugly- no wife No wife- no kids No kids- lonely Lonely- death No pen=death

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Knock Knock. Not home.

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What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

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how does your hair keep changing lengths? due to my countless hours of grueling sessions in chemotherapy due to what was recently found as a terminal cancer, i wear wigs

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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What sound does a baby make in a blender? Idk, i was too busy masturbating to hear.

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Something told me to write "vote pancakes" so I wrote "Vote Pancakes" it said it was wrong, and now I know why, capitals.

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Why was Mary mucky? Because she was dragged to a field and raped

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Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

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Roses are red Violets are blue Cats meow Dogs have four legs

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The awkward moment when a joke doesn't end the way you think it dinosaur.

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Q: What did the skeleton order when he walked into a bar? A: A beer and a mop.

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What brown and sticky? A sticky turd

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What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

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Q: What was the name of the armless elf in Snow White? A: Stumpy

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy wuzzy had cancer.

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I heard a joke one time about a Rabbi, a Priest, and a little boy. It wasn't funny.

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Everyone always gets up in arms over human trafficking... ... Well I kind of enjoy the convenience of air travel and so on.

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Q- why are anti-jokes funny? A- cuz

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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What time is it when grandpa sits ontop of a telephone pole and throws pineapples at people? Time to go to a nursing home

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Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Why did the man explode when he ate the cheeseburger? Because the man was actually a bomb.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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