Two men are making sandwiches, one man is spreading peanut butter over the bread and the other man is spreading honey and Italian raspberry jam over rye bread. the man with the peanut butter sandwich looks over and says "HEY, where did you get the rye bread?" and the man with the rye bread says "well my wife made it yesterday and I would be delighted if you come over for some tea, and tried some of my wife's homemade rye bread".

Steve Jobs is alive.

A man is mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he reaches down to see if something's stuck in the blades. What does he pull out? His finger.

what is the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? you take your shoes off before you jump on the trampoline.

my dick is like a bridge. i dont know why.

What do you call a gay mexican on welfare? poor

What's the difference between a guy who sees the glass half empty and a guy who sees the glass half full? The first guy is happier because his tables tip more than the second guy's.

Why did the boy show off his ps4? Because his mom was rapped and murdered And his dad molested him when he was younger

What did hitler say to Osama Bin Laden? Nothing they were born at different times

Why were there bones on the moon? The cow diden't make it.

When's the right time to join reality? Right now! Get off your computer!

How do you get a nun pregnant? Screw her.

What's the difference between above job and below job? Below job sucks

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

Q: What's worse than biting into and apple and finding a worm? A: being severely malnourished, thus physically inept to do most simple tasks

whats the diffference between pizza and a jew? burning a pizza makes me sad, burning a jew is worthy of a party!

Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken -A black guy being black

What did the boy with cancer get for christmas Nothing he didnt live that long

http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/popular/a-paper-cut-is-a-trees-last-revenge

Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

haha Otarts was here

-Knock knock! -Who's there? -Pizza. That'll be 20 bucks. -Here you go. -Thank you.

What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...