What happened to the frog that broke down? It got toad.

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What Batman Said to Robin before getting into the car? I'll drive.

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if a fat man in a red suit puts you in a bag at night. its not santa your getting raped

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I've just been struck by an enormous bolt of lightning. I am covered in boils and my house is full of frogs. I strongly recommend that when referring to God, always use the upper case 'H' on all personal pronouns.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father, prepare to die.

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'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

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What do you call a blonde on anti-joke? Fairly paranoid because of the typical blonde stereotype.

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No thank you, I don't like violence

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell down and bumped his head He suffered a serious concussion and was never the same again.

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What has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

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Yo Momma is so fat she is at risk of contracting Type 2 Diabetes.

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*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

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What happend to the girl in the corner? Idk that's why I asked!! :P

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A man is talking nonsense at a wall when another man walks up to him. "Why are you talking at a wall?" "I'm trying to appease the mighty wall god Kaleothayrhonka." "Cool, let me join you!" And they both talk at the wall for hours on end because they are stupid that way.

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What did the poor boy get for Christmas? Orphaned.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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hwhy did the monkey fall out of the tree? he got shot. why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? he was nailed to the first one.

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I wanted to burn some calories, so i lit a fat kid on fire

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A Quadriplegic walked into a bar,

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new piano? Neither has he...

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What do you get when you cross a spider with a cow? A dead spider.

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And the winner of Miss America 2050 is... Britney Spears!

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Roses are blue violets are red pull down ur pants and get in my bed :D

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how do you fall off a building? you trip.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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