whats beter than a dead pile of babies? the alive one that has to eat its way out

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A man walked into a bar and said "Ouch".

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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What Did The Hobo Get For Christmas? A Welcome Home Mat.

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What did the statue say to the other statue? Nothing, statues cant speak.

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planking.

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Why did the black guy smell fried chicken? He had a brain tumour

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It followed a trail of bird feed that was strewn across the street.

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What does 1 black person on the moon mean? A problem. What do 2 black people on the moon mean? A problem. What does every black person on the world on the moon mean? It's still a problem.

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Put chromosomes in advertising. Because you know, Sex Cells

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

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Why did Jimmy through a glass at spouse? Jimmy was an abusive husband who had a tendancy to drink too much.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Justin. Hello Justin, please come in.

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It's valentines today! My girlfriend died.

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What did the chair say to the guy? Nothing, as it is a chair and chairs can't talk

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I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

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What do you call a person with disabilities? Names.

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Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

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What do you call a black priest? HOLY SHIT!!!

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

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a morman walks into a bar, he buys a 7up.

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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