While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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how do you upset a black guy kill his family :)

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

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A plane crashes in the wilderness on the border of Canada and the U.S. Where do they bury the survivors? I lied. There were none.

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Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

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Q. why did the plane crash? A. because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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roses are red violets are blue i am black and so r u

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Where do babies come from? My sex dungeon

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What did one cupcake say to the other cupcake? I want to eat you.

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Everybody will die

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what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

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What's worse than farting in front of your boyfriend? Farting on your boyfriends pillow and giving him pink eye.

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how did the cat call 9-1-1? very carefully as cats do not have opposable thumbs, making the whole situation rare, and semi-improbable.

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If you are reading this you will soon suffer a slow and painful blow job... -_-

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

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Why did the man die when he hugged the pillow? He was hallucinating at the grand canyon.

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there was a black man n a white man they went into a hauted house the black man saw a penut butter slice n tryed to eat it then the ghost said dont eat the penut butter slice so the black man ran away so then the white man came and saw the penut butter slice the white man toke a bite then the ghots said i told u once i told you 2 i wipe my ass with that penut butter slice

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who would win in a gang battle? WEST COAST SWAG

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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What would you call a two-foot Irishman named Max? Max.

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i have a black man in my family tree. i am 25% african american among several other ethnicities.

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Good boy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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