Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house KNOCK KNOCK who's there? da chicken

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I was hoping you could tell me–why else would I ask you a question?

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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Why did the Jew hate bananas? He was deathly allergic to them.

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Magic! Well not really, you see, people that are stressed have the tendency to remain far longer into the state of hypnosis because their body conciously and subconciously (I am typoing it, but I cant bother to type it correctly fuck it) seek out the state of peace that hypnosis gives more often. Anyway, I know another thing that helps relieve stress, cough... Now, did you know that if you push your nose upwards slightly, you will feel a finger between your legs? its because nerve endings are connected that way, give it a go.

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Why are anti jokes so funny? Because their not.

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

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Q: How did the black guy die? A: After a long battle with a terrible case of pneumonia he struggled to breath and died a slow and peaceful death... R.I.P. Dad

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What did the two prostitute say to each other? I dont know, i wasn't there

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Huh, I never succeeded in any of those, and I tried a lot. Please tell me you never gone with something nasty like that...

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This is a random Anti joke.

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why was the blonde confused? because she was born with a low IQ making her mentally retarded.

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Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

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What does Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobil? ... - Come on Robin, let's get into the Batmobil...

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue Did you think I'd actually cry over you? I said I loved you You believed it was true Well guess what baby You just got played too! ??????

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Why did the man lose his job at the orange juice factory? Because the economy is shitty and none of the higher ups are willing to take a pay cut and they’re still paying themselves massive bonuses, the result of which are layoffs across all departments.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

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black people

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I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

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how do you get an old man to fall? tip over his wheelchair

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what starts with b and ends with itch pickle

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Q:What is the differenc between batman and a black man? A: Batman can go out in the night with out robin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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