Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black And so was six because they were written with black pen

Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

What did the falling bridge say to the other bridge? Well bridges can't talk but if it could it, then it would say AHH! I am falling

Peter charas threw a masterball at a level 20 Zubat!!!!!

What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sarah!

You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

ill have a no.9 a n.9 large

What are the two things that the little boy with cancer wants for Christmas? He wants his cancer to go away. He also wants the new Halo game.

Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

Don't wake me up. If you wake me up then I will give you a puppy. Just wait until you fall in love with the puppy, because then i will kill it in front of you.

Knock Knock Who's There? The I.R.S.

Why did Gavin kill Harley. Because his voices told him to.

A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

What's big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? Your mom.

Q: Why are lizards broke? A: Because they run around the desert with no money.

How many types of pure breed dogs are there in the world? 701

A fish and a human had a conversation. The conversation was not interesting because fish can't speak and the human felt awkward.

Q: Why did they bury the Indian? A: Because he was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...