What is the difference between a tree and a person? Trees don't scream when hit with an axe.

why was the albino black crying? because all babies cry you racist

You still alive? I used to be called proteus by the way, but then you disappeared and Neronism or watever its called now turned insane. I mean we killed you man! Out of mercy, you telling me a jacket changed you and everything? Where have you been? Six million followers? And all the shit that has made "moral man" the most lauded thing on Horsehead is you? Mind helping me make sense out of all of this?

Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

Why did the witch stay up all night with a broken broomstick? Because she couldn't sweep.

1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

A man walks into a bar. He says "ouch".

Only steers and queers come from Texas and i dont see any horns on you so what does that mean? It means I am not a Minotaur.

Why did the sheriff cross the road? Cuz I told him to.

what is worst than finding a worm in your apple? finding half a worm in your apple

Why did the boy not answer his mums call? because he was dead

What's flaming and has wheels? A firepit. I lied about the wheels.

A black person walked up to another black person, and tells him a pun the other black person laughs and walks away

Boy: whats for dinner Kidnapper: beans and weiners

I love watching pom Get your minds out of the gutter

what do you call a retarded kid? jack kamstra

Dallas Cowboys

What is black and hangs from a white supremacists tree? His kids tire swing.

If I had a dollar for every time i got distracted, I want some ice cream

What is red and has wheels? Grass, I lied about it being red and having wheels.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away privileges that she normally would have had had she not misbehaved.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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