Knock Knock. Who's there? You Know. You Know who?.......GOODBYE!

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A blond walked into a bar. A guy picked her up and then they had sex.

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What do Ed Milliband and David Milliband have in common? They are brothers.

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What happens when you read every anti-joke on anti-joke? You spend a lot of time in front of a screen. This means you should have a 10-15 minute break, so that your sinuses can rest and you don't develop a headache.

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How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

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What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

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Why was Johnny so sad His father beat his mother

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japan4.

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What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

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Why did Jerry Sandusky go to the shower room? He hadn't showered all week and was beginning to smell.

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What did the bartender say to the upset horse? GET OUT OF MY BAR!!!

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I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

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There are a fox and a chicken and the fox eats the chicken.

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Roses are Blue, Europe is Yellow. I suck at poems, Refridgerator

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God lets 3 people from hell come into heaven every year on chisrtmas based on how bad their last day on earth was. Its chistmas and god is standing a the gate of heaven and the first person comes up and god says, "Tell me what happend to you on your last day on earth" and the man says, " i thought my wife was cheating on me so i went to my apartment to check on her and i saw a man on the deck so pushed him off but i didnt know it was my brother. he caught onto the railing so i smashed his fingers with a sledge hammer and he fell 200 ft. Sadly he landed on a bush and survived and so i took the refridguator and through it on him but right after i did i had a heart atack" Then god lets him in to heaven. Then he has the next person come up and god asks him the same question. the man replies, " i was at my brotheres house when some crazy guy pushes me off the my brothers deck but luckily my fingers get caught onthe railing, Then the crazy guy takes a hammer and hits my fingers and i fall but land on a bush. Then the man throughs a refridguator and i get killed." God chuckles and lets him into heaven. The next person comes up and says," picture this, naked in a refridguator." excpaination: the man in tthe refriduator was cheating with the 1st mans wife.

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What's purple and in my hand? Nothing i was lying about the purple

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What's big and messy? A big mess

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What's retarded and comes from Eygelshoven? Roel van den Elzen

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Why couldn't the old man read the street sign? Because there were no words. Just an arrow designating a trun up ahead.

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Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

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why was the pen lonely? because it didn't have a pen pall

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how can you tell if your moms fat? if Dora can't explore her (mx)

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What did one stool say to the other stool? Stools don't speak!

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fish fishy caoimhin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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