A man walked into a bar, therefore beginning a lifetime of alcoholism that would slowly tear his family apart.

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Woman rights.

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

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Why is the boy severely mentally scarred? He got raped.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

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what do you call a man with no arms no legs cancer and down syndrome? you call him stephen because his name is stephen

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What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm A nimals

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You go on Nero, he got all red, not sure if he is mad or ashamed or both, but we can all tell that man is jealous. Employee.

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Why do vampires suck blood? Because they re crazy.

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Annld so the penguin said, "This is my most casual outfit!"

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Roses are red, But ravens are black, please go to China, and never come back!

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lybia

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Bark I'm a tree

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Your momma so poor, she has a hard time paying her bills.

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Dusters blow stuff.

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A man knocks on a wooden door. A woman says who is it?

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If you see a fat man, what do you say to him? Hopefully nothing mean, seeing as that would be demoralizing to the fat man.

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What is white black and Chinese A panda

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, a dead baby is a horrible sight and shouldn't be laughed at.

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Whats luckier than finding a lucky penny? winning the lottery.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

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In the middle of a long flight from Heathrow to Chicago O'Hare, the passengers of a 747 watched the engines all suddenly flame out. "Now, folks," the captain said over the PA as the plane plummeted to the earth, "I want it on record that I said it in plain English: a 747 can't fly from Heathrow to Chicago without refueling." No one bothered writing it down.

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Your momma's so fat she died five years ago.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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