I may have alzheimer's but at least I don't have alzheimer's.

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The doctor woke up and the hooker he screwed told him she had the clap and he said thats the least of your problms bitch you have aids

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What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

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What do you call a black man with a lip desiese? Jumbo shrimp

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Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

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Steven hawkings shook my hand

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Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains! That's the least of your worries you have aids!

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When is a door not a door? When it has yet to be created from its base components.

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Did you hear about the guy with five penises? Me neither, because that sounds like a very improbable aberration.

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What does the Jewish man and the Atheist have in common? They both believe in a god. Except the Atheist.

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Now Showing: EVIL SLOTHS II "The worst death is a slow death."

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Knock knock, who's there? Your mom! Oh I'm comming.

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What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? Well, I couldn't understand them... It's hard to pronounce anything clearly when your mouth is full, which is why you don't eat and speak simultaneously.

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i'm on the sea food diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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How can you tell if someone's a Vegan? It will probably come up in conversation, usually during the planning phase of a trip to a restaurant.

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third guy ducks.

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Whats better then free candy from a guy in a van? Trying to find his lost puppy so his kids don't cry.

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Whats long and black and goes around corners? The unemployment line.

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What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. My thumb is red because I accidentally put it in the toaster.

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What's better than winning the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

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A blonde walks into a drycleaning store 2 pick up her clothes and as she walks out the empoyee says cum again and the blonde says shut up it was toothpast this time!!!!

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Why did the teenage girl pee on a stick? She and her boyfriend had foolishly engaged in unprotected sex two weeks before, and she was now concerned that she may be pregnant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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