George Zimmerman walks into a bar .

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An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

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I AM DEAD, FUCKING, SERIOUS! NOW GET OVER HERE MOMMY I WANT TO... ...Thats pretty disgusting, I was born a man, maybe an infant man, but a man regardless. So how about you stop showcasing me to people here and we just take off? I mean I am dead tired and sleepy, I would say good night, but its day here now so yeah.

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I wanted to burn alot of calories so i found a fat kid and set him on fire. :3

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Roses are red Violets are blue S*** is brown and so are you

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Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Jehovah's Witness." "Jehovah's witness, who?" "Just Jehovah's Witness. Your doorbell is not working."

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Oh, they were just nailing a notice of foreclosure to the door.

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Q. What did batman say to Robin before they got in the car? A. Get in the car Robin.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

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Q:What does a wheel a triangle and a circle all have in common A:There all round, I lied about the triangle.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer..... I'm going to rip the scalp off of your son and where it on my face to a Cherokee Sacrificial Ceremony The other lawyer was actually a lightbulb

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A guy walks into a bar and doesn't buy a 12 pack of coke, pepsi is better but he didn't have enough money to buy either.

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what did the guy say to the other guy? nothing because right before he was going to say something he was hit by a truck and got knocked out for 11 hours and right before he was going to wake a plane crashed into the hospital and everybody died except for two gay guys.

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What do you get when you cross a Poodle with a cupcake? Stop looking at these anti-jokes and get back to work.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother.

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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Q: why did the boy walk into the woods alone? A: nobody knows he hasn't come out yet

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How do you stop a train? Throw a fridge at it.

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What do your friends have in common with a tree? They both fall down when you hit them multiple time with an axe

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Why couldn't the turtle swim? Because he went too close to an oil spill, the petroleum got into his mouth and coated his lungs and he is now dead.

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What do you get when you cross a vampire and Adolf Hitler? A socially unacceptable and awkward hybrid of two unrelated, technically dead things.

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why did the man die? Because he was robbing a bank and police used lethal weapons By- the duck

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This is not a joke.... It is mind rape.

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What do you do when life hands you lemons? Such a statement assumes that life is an actual person, which is impossible. Thus, you do not need to concern yourself with what you must do when life hands you lemons.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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