A man walks into a bar. He has a serious drinking problem and is destroying his life.

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My childhood friend said she had a bad breakup with her husband (yeah husband), and that she needed a really stiff one. Come on! How was I supposed to know she was talking about alcohol! She did blush and smile after I pulled my pants down however, that`s like seven out of ten right? I mean I was just trying to help a friend out right? And myself, fine myself, but it will be a total win/win situation, you know... Those where you win twice? "Dont worry, Im not comming" *pewpew*

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How did the magician make his assistant disappear? He killed her and then cremated her body

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What do you call a gynochologist named John? John

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What do you call a fat man that can turn slim REALLY fast? Drew Carey

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Q: What's worse than both of your parents dying in a terrible car accident? A: Sitting in the back seat with your grandparents.

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How do you cheer up a sad caterpillar? KILL IT WITH FIRE

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, shes already been told twice

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? It was my car.

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Your momma's so fat that she went on a diet.

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? She is a goner.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Rebecca Black sings a song.

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Yo mamas so tan she might get skin cancer

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A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? There was a huge pile of dead babies blocking his path.

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Q: What's the difference between a polar bear and a washing machine? A: Many things.

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why did the girl say what's up. she wanted to know what they were doing

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Men's rights

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penis?

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A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

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So, I'm sitting by this guy in Science class and we're learning about fungi. So this guy is being really nice and I tell him, "Bro, you're just a FUNgi to hang around", like fun guy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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