one fish two fish red fish kill the fish

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How long does it take to microwave a baby? I don't know, I was to busy masterbating. GBW

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, I am color blind.

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because the The husband told her to...

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Why did the man ask his wife to make him a sandwich? He lost both of his arms in the war.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire? Lawyers exist, are alive and despite all claims to the contrary, can withstand sunlight, garlic and the sign of the cross. They also have reflections and whilst they may eat black pudding from time to time they don't depend on blood as a source of nutrition.

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Why did Hitler cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

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Where did Susie go after an explosion? Everywhere

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What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

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Knock Knock. To get to the other side.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because chickens just walk places. they have no agenda.

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What do you call a black man with mishap-in head scares on the left side of his face and a 3rd degree burns on the right side? a very unfortunate guy.

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So a seal walks into a bar... ...seals can't walk.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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tomorrows international kill and orphan day, how meany of the sad bastard's you plan on baking into dough?

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the weiner dog have a bad childhood? Uncle Monty put his foot up its arse on a daily basis before chewing dorris's nose, ears and eyelids.

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a black man, spanish man, and white man all fall off a building. and as they fall, i wonder: why are you laughing?

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your mom is so fat that she should probably try a deit in the neer future

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WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. False. Violets are violet

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what do you call a black priest? holy shit!

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A Jew, a black guy, and a redneck are walking down the street because their car broke down a few miles back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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