Why didn't Bill go to the party? He wasn't invited.

Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

Whats a box full of sand? a sandsquare

Q: How many pandas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I don't know.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

Your mum's so fat, she attends regular weight loss facilities to lose weight.

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How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

I have a crush on my dad.

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had just been brutally raped by a lawnmower. The lawnmower had been hit by a car. The woman driving the car was suffering from Alzheimers disease. Which then escalated from the stress of the accident that she took her cat and ripped his right ass cheek then continued on with her day

What did the flower say to it's friends? I want to kill a Christmas tree.

I painted my dog to look like pizza. Someone ate him. It was my mom.

whats the difference between a black man and a bench a bench can support a family

A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

You wanna hear a JOKE ?!! Justin Bieber has a DlCK !!!

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Whats the difference between a house and a mouse If you think about it , quite a lot really

What's moist wet and I put my finger in it? My nose.

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

Four turtles once fell into nuclear waste. They remained unnoticed and later died from exposure to radiation.

If you were an octopus what would you? Say "I an octopus".

What is worst than a worm in your apple, the holocaust and everything else? Finding me in your bed (or your mother screaming "help please, no wait its too good I will endure the pain") Rather than Santa`s presents for X-mas. Your friendly Neighborhood and Future ONE AND ONLY EMPEROR R*pist Moral Man:: X-mas is a great way of putting it, after all it is your kind that X-ed Christ... ...As for your mother/sister/Infant/ screaming... Don`t worry, I will come for you too when I am done, it might take a while to violate someone to death though so be patient, because you might end up as a patient... Hahahaha! If you are really FUCKlNG LUCKY!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...