a man walks into a bar it hurt

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whats brown and sticky? a four week dead uunborn african child...

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Roses are red Violets are blue I want to have sex But no one else wants to

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How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

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What`s the best part about twenty-three year olds? there are twenty of them

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Instead of throwing out his garbage, a young boy decided to play a prank on some passersby and left a banana peel on the sidewalk. moments later an elderly woman walked past and slipped on the banana, falling backwards and smashing her head. The young man watched from the bushes as paramedics shook their heads and placed a now lifeless body in a body bag and took it away. The young boy, startled and shocked at what he just saw, tried to run away, but slipped on his own banana peel, falling backwards onto the pavement. The young boy was lucky and survived, but later had to go to therapy for many years to come, the thought of his prank gone wrong torturing him until he took his own life. What is the moral of the story? Do not litter, ALWAYS throw out your garbage.

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Why are black people ghetto? Because they are black.

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Steve buys 60 watermelons.. What does he have? A lot of watermelons.

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Person A - I farted Person B - YUCK

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roses are red, violets are blue, poems are stupid, refridgerator

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Why was the Irishman ejected from the bar? For breaching client-attorney privilege, and the correct term is disbarred.

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What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

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Yo momma so fat when god said let there be light he said get the fuck out the way!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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What did the doctor tell his patient? Unfortunately you have cancer.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Im blind

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25

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Two People go To Africa They have a lovely time they come home then go to Miami Florida after Florida they decide to go to germany sadly there was a plane crash and the two men fell into a pit of acid.

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

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Q. What did the man say when he beat his video game? A. "I beat my video game." Q. What did the man say after his favorite sports team missed the playoffs? A. "My favorite sports team missed the playoffs." Q. What did the man say when a murderer was in his house? A. Nothing. He was dead.

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Mormons having fun.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Waking up with a snapping turtle up your butt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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