What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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What's worst then finding a worm in your apple Eating it.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Ok good, just checking. It would be a shame for your perishable foodstuffs to go bad.

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A blode walks into a bar, She gets her hair dyed brown and is later presumed smarter due to a the genral public being steriotipical.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

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Q: Why didn't Jane cross the road? A: Because Jane is a figment of my imagination and therefore has neither the physical capability to cross this so called "road" nor the initiatory motivation to do so...

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A cheetah walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve re cheetah, as cheetahs are an endangered species and does not want to risk the cheetah succumbing to alcohol poisoning.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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What do you do when you come across a tiger in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologize.

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What's purple and has four wheels? A frog, except for the purple and four wheels part.

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Why did the boy go to heaven? He was in an airplane.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and an astronaut? One walks on the moon and the other has sex with little boys.

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Why wasn't the 7 year old boy happy? I shot him

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A baby seal walked into a club.

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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Why didn't the 34 year old woman fit into some size 14 jeans? Because she was size 16.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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Whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

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what happened to the man that no one cares about? No one cares

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You just sunk my battleship! 5,000 people just perished at the bottom the ocean in a war for pointless political reasons.

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to see him rocking and rolling on it.:)

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Roses are red, violetes are red, I'm colorblind

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why did the boy stay home from school? it was saturday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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