Knock knock. Who's there? Frank. Frank who? Cut the shit, I'm being chased by a tiger!

When a blonde entered a bar, she ordered a something that was a double-entendre. The bartender understood what she was trying to say, gave her her order whatever alcohol she happened to consume, and the blonde woman could not have been more courteous.

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

There was a curtain who sneezed and then asked you for a tissue. He was in a room with two chairs a coffee table and a 37 year old bookcase, why did he sneeze???? Because he had a cold!!????

You die of loss of blood, under a pile of first-aid kits

Wanna know what a hate about instructions? I always get my dick stuck in a ceiling fan.

What's worse than 4 black guys sitting in a Jeep that goes over a cliff? They were my friends.

What do you call a black person with white legs ? Ashy

What is invisible and smells like carrots? Invisible carrots.

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

Imagine a scenario Add a Rhubarb Crumble into your scenario Add your mother and father sitting together watching the news in your scenario. Your scenario should take place in an old people's home Add an Olympic athlete doing the splits into your scenario If there were any crane-flies in your scenario, be sure to subtract them at once. Divide your scenario by two. Your scenario should now be a mental image of flying horses and a hippopotamus eating a large salmon mousse. There will be a pig tied to a pair of sunglasses.

Terry is at his job, when he drops his cookie on the floor. His coworker accidentally steps on it as he's about to pick it up. "Sorry" says his coworker. "I guess that's the way the cookie crumbles" said Terry. Turns out Terry is black.

Now I have been typing without even thinking about that, and you have been following me.

The Irishman walked out of the bad.. Haha just kidding

How did the fat guy survive the air crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else.

I met a fat girl and fucked her on an elevator. . . It was wrong on so many levels.

your mommas so fat she has been advised to diet and excercise or run the risk of terminal illness

there is a woman named shannen. she is happily married and has children.

why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming and it seemed like a safe time to cross

My children are mistakes

You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

Why is the women in the street selling her body for money? because she has 3 kids and a father with cancer.

69

whats the difference between a black guy and a park bench? well a park bench is an inanimate object that people use to sit on and feed the birds at the park. and a black guy is a living being who is looked down upon in society.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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