Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

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Why didn't the boy have any pockets on? He didn't have any pants on

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? A disgusting halfbreed which prays daily for its own euthenasia...

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What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting a needle shoved into your penis and the needle hitting your scrotum so that you are in serious agony for hours and finding out you cannot have kids because of it.

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What has hands but can't clap? - A Quadraplegic

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Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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A guy went to a girl asked if she wanted to have sex with him. She said yes and they promptly had sex.

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Doctor, doctor! I think I'm a pair of curtains... Well don't worry, you've come to the right place. We'll get you the help you need.

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You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

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Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

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Why was the Nazi killed? for crimes against Humanity

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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What happen to the girl that did the splits. Her legs broke.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

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what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

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Why did Billy Bob kidnap Jamal? Because he finds the African American community fascinating and is unable to start up a regular conversation due to the over-amplified stereotype that rednecks usually kidnap and/or kill black people. Therefore, kidnapping Jamal was necessary so that he could have a conversation with him about his heritage and background.

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A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears.

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How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

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What did one Pokemon say to the other pokemon? We are fake.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Josh. Lettuce who? I didn't say "lettuce"... I said Josh.

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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