What's black and has the texture of tar? Molasses

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was unaware that it could get run over by a motor vehicle.

Thank you so much Nero, I have read it and I am crying because I am happy, at first I was worried because I have never cried out of happiness before. But its over. Nero, you underestimate yourself a lot, promise me we will work with that together, sometimes you almost convince me you are as inferior as you say, but then you get out of your shell of doubt your past has caused in you (its not you when you doubt yourself its what they put in you), you are always there when people need you, teach me hypnosis someday and let me remove that part of you which does not allow you to believe in yourself. Dont reply Nero, calm down and sleep, I feel you are allright, I just know.

Why did Daphie die? I stabbed her 487 times.

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? Probably 5

what did the lesbian do with the other lesbian? played badminton

why did the cow cross the road? n i g g e r

whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

What did the Black man get after a month's worth of manual labour? A reasonable wage, that was above the national minimum wage standard which states his and everyones right to a certain amount of money

Whats the difference between Obama and Hitler? One is the President of the United States The other is a fascist dictator that killed millions.

Why do all gingers get mad all the time except having sex? Because they enjoy it!!!

whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

Q: Why should you never let Jerry Sandusky babysit your children? A: Because, in November of 2011, Sandusky was arrested and charged with 40 counts of sexual abuse of young boys over a 15-year period. A man with this type of background does not seem like a an ideal choice for a babysitter.

How do you get a black man to run? Ask him how his day has been, catch up on some memories of your time at school together, then challenge him to a foot race.

Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

Roses are red Violets are blue I had sex with your mother

Q: Are their Jews in Hell? A: No, because Hitlers there

When is a joke funny? When you read it.

Why did the spoon say hi to the fork? To initiate a conversation.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Probably cheese, since there really isn't a possesive form of the noun.

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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