Q. Why did the black man get sent to prison? A. Because he was falsely accused of murder.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven.

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A blonde girl is lying dead on the floor with a potato peeler in her hand, what killed her? Substance abuse and loneliness.

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Why was Jimi's mom sad? Because Jimi suddenly fell to the floor clenching his neck while saying "I'm Dying!"

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When u r using ur computer and then all the sudden it says reload and something about an error blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah .. ......blah blah blah. Blah blah. Your response: "AWWWWW BITCH ASS FUCK U"......*LEAVES ROOM*..... (HOUR LATER)*COMES BACK IN THE ROOM* "Oh hey, Meet my bff she is from your version of Hell her name is , Vir-is (virus) anyways Vir-is wanted to have sex with u and probably give u a USB Transmitted Disease A.K.A. virus then wwhile u r rebooting Vir-is and I is gonna kill u Toodles

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<=-[ J1MMY | Dubstep Maniacs Crew 4 Life ]-=>

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Methodist minister were playing golf. The Priest won by one stroke.

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Why do all black men carry guns? They don't. That is a stereotype. Now pants on the other hand, that's a different story.

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You might be a redneck if you hate your father and you live in a trailer

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What did one cat say to the other cat? --------- Meow --------- What's pink and fluffy? --------- Pink fluff --------- What's green and yellow? --------- Grass. I lied about the yellow part.

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Why did Jimmy never like old people? Because he was abused as a child by one.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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yo mama so old that back in her school she didnt have history class

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs Mat

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What did the raped girl say to the doctor? Nothing she was dead on arrival.

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? A ride to a Concentrtation Camp.

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How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

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Knock knock Who's there? Alzhiemers guy Alzhiemers guy who? Knock knock

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What has one eye but cannot see? A brick with an eye drawn on it

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What do you get if you cross a banana, a mango, and an apple? A smoothie

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I used to fit trough doors, but then I got tall... I used to play with other babies, but then I got tall... (daradadadadan) I used to look up to you, but then I got tall (OH YEAH!) but then I got tall, but then I got tall, but then I got tall! Moral: Censorship should be illegal.

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What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

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what do you call an elevator full of white people. a box of crackers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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