Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

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Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your mum. Oh hi mum, the doors unlocked

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Where did sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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What did the dogs say to Michael Vick? Arf Arf Arf, woof woof woof

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I painted my dog to look like pizza. Someone ate him. It was my mom.

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A man walks in a barn. He lifts his bucket of food and starts feeding his horses.

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-What do you call a pyromaniac on a golf course? *** I backed over your cat. -A FIREHAZ- wait what?

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Joesph Triphook.

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A deaf lion tried to kill a zebra. It succeeded.

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Why did the guy get hit by a bus? He walked out into traffic.

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arena football

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Knock knock.. Whos there? To... To who? To whom.

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Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

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"knock knock" "who's there" "I dont know, check the door"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

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A man walks into a bar, it's funny because he is an alcholholic

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What's worse then 2 dead monkeys? 3 dead monkeys!

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Knock knock Whos there? Sorry, wrong house,goodbye!

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When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

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Your Grandma and your mom drove off a cliff, who survived? Both of them, they didn't drive off a cliff.

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What do you call a Mexican that swam across the border? An illegal immigrant.

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Why did the passenger plane crash? Well, if not mechanical failure or human error, probably because a bomb was detonated onboard.

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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