whats up fuch you bitch

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

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Davey Peterson.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

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Why did Susie start shaking? She had continuous ceasars

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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What did the unicorn say to the horse? I have a horn and you don't.

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A bartender walks into a bar. He serves alcohol for a living.

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knock knock There's no door

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What's the difference between a joke and an anti-joke? I don't know man, but you touch yourself at night.

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Magic Johnson has AIDS

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Tell him he won the current game of hide n seek.

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What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

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What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

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What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

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What's the difference between victims of Brady and Hindley and a pile of dead babies? Some were born dead and the others were raped then killed.

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Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

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Hello

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Why did the little girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

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What do a plane and a flight attendant have in common? They're both going somewhere in their careers. Aside from the flight attendant.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

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How much coke can Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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Out of Jill, Jason, Jesse, Jane and Harold, which one is the odd one out? Jason, because he only has one arm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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