A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

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A racist guy walks into a bar. Gets drunk, and cracks jokes. Then proceeds to get the shit kicked out of him.

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what do you say when your phone is broken? A: my phone is broken

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yo mama so fat, she got more chins than china town

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What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

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Anyone reading this I'm not writing anything Kevin

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A dog walks into a bar. He's a service animal, so this is allowed.

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In soviet Russia - some people were poor.

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

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What do cookies and Ruber have in common? Ones edible one is not

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when god gives you lemons, you find a new god!

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Why did the drunk driver get into an accident? It was a woman.

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what do you get when you see jonny cry-a monkey lol

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Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

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Your mommas so poor she can't afford food for her child. Thats you.

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-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

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What did the Catholic preist say to the altar boy? You've been a good altar boy.

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Miscarriages.

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Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

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Her Majesty's Government of the United Kingdom of Great Britain

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Q. Why did the car break dance? A. I dont know!

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? STOLEN! You're under arrest.

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A farmer and his son were walking to the well to fetch some water. The farmer stops, turns to his son and is mauled to death by a lion because they were in Africa.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I´ll give anything to be screw by you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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