Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To hold their pants up.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? If the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are because there are no replacement light bulbs, the don't have transportation, and the nearest store is 10 miles away. In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Gay jokes aren't funny Cum on guys

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A black man found chicken on the floor. He ate it.

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How did the boy cross the road? He didn't he had polio.

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Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

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Do you have a curfew? No its saturday!

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Why was the young Jewish boy afraid at camp? Because his scoutmaster is a pedophile.

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a drug dealer was caught and sent to jail. he asks the cop if he could give the cop the drugs for bail. the cop does not except the offer because it is against the law.

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What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What do you call a really old Cowboy? A senior citizen with a brain tumor.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. Due to the height of the fall, one of his ribs pierced his heart and he also suffered extensive head trauma and internal bleeding due to the force when he hit the floor, where he lay in agony for several hours before dying a slow, painful death.

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What fires shots? A gun

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was an attempted suicide. His family left him, he had been in and out of rehab for a terrible cocaine addiction for over ten years, and was still having nightmares about his abusive past.

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How do you mess with Hellen Keller? Re-arrange her furniture.

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why can't the black man get a job? The economy is suffering and unemployment rates are at an all time high

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"why did the cheese not go to church on sunday" "because it was jewish"

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are yellow Azeleas are pinkish purple

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why didnt the dog bark? he died in his sleep

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pauls tuck

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What's the worst joke ever? Justin Bieber.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Very carefully.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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