how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

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Why did the dog go in the bar? Because the door was left open

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Two men meet at an office. One man says "why the long face?" Then other man says "I just had plastic surgery."

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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1 + 1 = 3

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split your ass cheek

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Why did the man jump out of the plane? Because the plane was losing fuel fast so he grabbed a parachute and went for it and realized that was the only one left so everyone died a horrible death.

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whats worse than getting ur penis cut off......no holocaust

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Why did the guy crash his car? Because he didn't want to crash his truck.

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What do you call a black man with a gun? Officer.

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Why did the soccer player miss practice? He got shot in the face.

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Your mom is so hot your daddy married her and they lived happily ever after

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a seal walks into a club.

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there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

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i wonder when lachlan will come out of the closet and give keiran a blowjob

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Why did the shrimp refuse to share? Because he was a little shellfish.

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What's red and the size of a packet of crisps? A Miscarriage

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Did you hear about the Australian man who was jumped by a gang of Americans with knifes? He had his cash and possessions stolen from him, and had to spend two weeks in hospital due to stab wounds.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

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guess what>? your mum lol

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what do you call a little girl next to a mexican? a rape victim.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Elephants cant jump Neither can amputees

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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