What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Lets go get some tacos.

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knock knock. no one answered so the man at the door went home.

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How do you say vampire in spanish? Vampiro.

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What did the paper say to the pen? Nothing, they are inanimate objects!

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Q: Wy couldn't the T-rex grab the other Dinosor? A: Because he is extinct.

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Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Some men are blind.

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Want to hear a joke? Jokes are not allowed on this site. Only anti-jokes.

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A duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said the the man running the stand hey ba ba ba got any grapes? the man said no but i got some shut the F*CK up!

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Q: How do you get a one armed blond of of a tree? A: You grab a ladder and help her down safely.

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what do you call a black man on crack? a crackhead.

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How do you kill a black guy? Shoot him in the temple

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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A student asks a teacher: Sir, how much time would it take for me to do this quiz. Teacher says: From the second I give you this test to the second you hand it back to me.

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What did the pc say to the Mac? You suck

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Roses are red violets are next thing you know my D*** is in you

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she is dead.

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What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? A Holocaust. What's worse than a Holocaust? 3 bee stings.

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2 tomatoes walk across a road tomato 1 gets hit by a car tomato 2 gets confused, because tomatoes don't have legs and therefore cannot "walk across a road" And furthermore, a tomato does not have a brain, and thus cannot get confused.

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Yo mama so old, she must take arthritus medicine to keep out of extreme pain.

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Why do men not get cullulite? Because it's ugly.

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Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

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here kitty kitty

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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