Roses are red Violets are violet Why does it go like that anyways? ~Yasmin~

Jon waits in his driveway for a bit then rides off to a lemonade stand but doesn't stop because the stand is surrounded by police who have arrested the kids at the stand for selling spiked lemonade. He continues past the stand and goes somewhere else (probably Subway).

Q:what do you call a black man flying a plane? A: a pilot

So a clown walks up to you and asks, "What'll always STICK with you? The violent disposition of humanity."

What's the difference between a poodle and a noodle? Scaboodle!

Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

What do you call a black elephant? An elephant.

Why did Greg move to the Lake District? Because his dog died and the family is in mourning.

i like my women like i like my coffee without a penis

what are three short words? i a am

Why couldn't the little boy find his friend in hide and go seek He was blind

How do you catch a Jew? Just give him a little shower ;)

A duck walks into a bar. The large African American male at table three punches the smaller Asian man at the bar because of a long standing and unfulfilled monetary debt. The Asian man procedes to pull out a concealed knife and repeatedly stab his assailant until he is dead. The duck orders several rounds of whiskey due to the fact that it has recently been fired from its job. Later that night, it took its own life.

Why did the man fall over? He was blind.

Why did the monkey eat his own poop? Because there was minimal resources where he was so he resorted to eat his own fecal matter

Knock knock Who's there? The chicken that crossed the road

What's the opposite of Christopher Walkins? Christopher Reeves.

How many Jews can you fit in an oven? None, it's illegal.

A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia ...where am I

Why did Mary fail to consume her breakfatst? Because Suzy has a history of bi-polar disorder as well as anorexia.

Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

have you seen ray charles' house? neither has he.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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