Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

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When life gives you Corn Nuts, snack on them while watching your favorite TV show. Then go to sleep early and have a nice, peaceful rest, dreaming about the fun things you'll do tomorrow.

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Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

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what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

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Q: What's the difference between black and white? A: A lot...

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why did nick leave school? bECAUSE HE WAS RETARDED

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Q: What happened to the man who died? A: Nothing, there is no afterlife.

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yo momma is so fat her doctor recommended a new healthy diet.

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What do you get when you cross a canary and a lawnmower? Nothing. A canary is a small bird, and a lawnmower is an inanimate object. Any procreation of this sort would likely produce no offspring.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i got 5 Fingers, the middle ones for you ?

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

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What's white or grey or brown or green or black or yellow or purple ? Could be almost anything, really.

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Whats the same about Jerry Seinfeld and Adam Sandler They are both comedians

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if a fat man in a red suit puts you in a bag at night. its not santa your getting raped

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Roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry show me your tits!!

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin... Nothing they are muffins.

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What do you get when you write your own anti-joke? Herpes.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Why is Henrik so AWESOME? Cos HE just IS!!!!

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

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What's the difference between a plane and a Muslim dentist? A plane hasn't dedicated its life to the study of dentistry

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An Asian walks into a bar. He has a few drinks, but makes sure not to have to many. He then drives home safely, and enjoys a good nights rest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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