Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

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Chrysanthemums our orange violettes are musical

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot

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What do you call a full refrigerator? A freezer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

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Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

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Don`t be mean? WOMAN! DO YOU NOT HOW TERRIBLE THE DEMAND YOU MAKE IS? ...Fine alright, I wont leave you hanging then... So I wont call. Moral: "Seriously though, I am leaving too, but I want the top comment"

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

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One time at band camp.............tha'ts it........

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What did one duck say to the other duck? Nothing, ducks cannot talk.

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call me a bitch You're a bitch Only bitches do what they are told!

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What did the UPS man bring Sara? a box. whats inside it is only Sara's buisness

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A guy who plays shooting games acquires an assault rifle but he doesn't kill anyone, why? Because he was a nice and peaceful man who loves his wife.

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What did the squirrel say to the other squirrel? Squirrels can't talk.

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Did you hear about the circus fire? Yes, apparently there were no casualties but all their props and equipment were destroyed, which will set the company back financially, even with the insurance.

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a dyslexic man walked into a bar, ordered a beer, and no one was aware of his affliction

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Q: Why was the man wet? A: I push him in a pool.

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What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

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you know its foggy outside when you step outside and its foggy outside.

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how Sudan answered England when England's ambassador eaten by Sudanese people? Eat ours

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Whats the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair? Cancer.

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How do you make Mandy Ann shut up? Clown Car

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What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common? Their middle name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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