What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a truck.

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Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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What do you call a fat zombie? Dead

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Why did the room packed with married people seem empty? Maybe they were all playing hide-and-seek. Or maybe the room was pitch black and they were all standing very still and quietly.

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You're mother is so retarded that I probably shouldn't be making fun of her because it would be considered discriminatory.

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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When u r using ur computer and then all the sudden it says reload and something about an error blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah .. ......blah blah blah. Blah blah. Your response: "AWWWWW BITCH ASS FUCK U"......*LEAVES ROOM*..... (HOUR LATER)*COMES BACK IN THE ROOM* "Oh hey, Meet my bff she is from your version of Hell her name is , Vir-is (virus) anyways Vir-is wanted to have sex with u and probably give u a USB Transmitted Disease A.K.A. virus then wwhile u r rebooting Vir-is and I is gonna kill u Toodles

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it smells like up dog in here. whats that?

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What do you call a barn full of black people? antique farm equipment.

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If you shaved Chuck Norris' beard, you'd find a chin.

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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- Are you thinking what I'm thinking B1? - No.

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What do you call a black man with cancer? Someone with cancer

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Why did the cat eat himself? He was hungry

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What is black and white and red all over? Yemen's national flag.

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hey what are you eating there? a giant scorpion that tried to rape me.

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Why did billy have a bruse? Because he got smacked with a belt. -Louis

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My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms. A: Knock knock! B: Who's there? A: Not Sally.

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Why cant Michael Jackson take flying lessons? Because he overdosed on pain killers, and is now dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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