.... Take my wife..... .... She is lovely....

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Why are anti jokes so funny? Because they are not

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What do you call hunter ? An anerexic that is skinny as a tooth pick. Duh

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

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What is bad at catch The twin towers

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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What do you call a prison inmate with no arms or legs? John. That's his name.

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what did I say to myself nothing because its very weird to talk to your self

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A black man walks into a bar. No comments were said to him for everyone else was paying attention to their other peers.

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What's room temperature and tastes like ice cream? Melted ice cream

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How do you make a kid with ADHD stay still? Shoot him in the knee cap

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Knock Knock Whos there Reality* Knock Knock *Opens Door*

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Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a pineapple

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What's worse than getting punched in the balls? Many things inflict more pain than that

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liam buchan is gay !

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? To get his chemotherapy

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Nicole: Shove it where the sun don't shine! Katlyn: I'm richer than you! Nicole: Shut your frickin' mouth! Katlyn: You'll be bankrupt! (This conversation was recorded while Nicole and Katlyn were playing Monopoly. They both died in a car accident later that day...)

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What do an eagle and a badger have in common? They both live underground...except the eagle

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why did the cow say "moo"? because he's a cow and that's what cows say.

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your momma is so old, she has heart problems

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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What do you call a retarded man? Mentally challenged.

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what does matt daly like to do in his free time anal

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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