Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

Friends are like trees, They fall down if you hit them several times with an axe.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Actually it couldn't even walk because of all the hormones they injected into it in order to genetically enhance it's size and flavor.

What happen when the man preposed to his girlfriend? He regretted for the rest or his life.

Why didn't the boy run the marathon? He was cripple.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

Why dose my mom have a penis? She is a man

wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

Why was the girl crying? Because she was brutally raped

A man gets hit by a car. His family is sad and plans a funeral.

What happened to Bilbo? He shit his pants.

What do you get when you mix a crap with a fart and a slug? Urmom

how do you kill jesus? with a knife

Why did Jenny fail her driving test? She was hit by a train.

That awkward moment when... Your mom is a guy.

What's green and has wheels? A refrigerator, I lied about the green and the wheels.

A man walks into a bar. He then walks out of the bar a while after. He then goes home and goes to bed. And then he goes to sleep. And then in an odd time travel paradox,a T-Rex arrives from the past and kills him and his entire family.

Why did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Why was the drunk man in jail? He had lost touch with himself because his wife cheated on him the previous night and to add to the fact she took his clothes so public nudity would be a problem.

What do men and parking spots have in common? Both often have cars on top of them. Vehicular manslaughter is a serious issue.

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

Q: what is blue and floats in a pool? A: a baby Q: what is purple and at the bottom of the pool? A: the baby 5 minutes later

Let's make like your mother and walk out on your family during pre-adolescence.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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