why did hellen kellers dog run away? because if your name was awughunguh you'd run too.

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why couldn't the old man play basketball? he lacked the physical dexterity, had asthma, and had no arms.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

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What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Rabid squirrels attacked Blake's face as winged pickles perched on Phoebe's hair.

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horses are burgers now ive got the flu watch out tescos because im gonna sue

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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What do you call the man who graduated medical school last in his class? Doctor

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If a tree falls down in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does God exist?

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Roses are brown I like clouds this joke isn't funny so don't laugh..... Oh an I am trying to get the most dislikes so whatever you do don't like it:(:(:(

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Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

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I enjoy the fact that the jokes I post that do not make me laugh, are the ones that get zero thumbs, while those that at least make me smile, get at least a couple, I admit thought that its hard to keep track with me, I type jokes so fast that they disappear in the back before people can thumb them... Have you heard... Of the dog that was barking up the wrong three? The three said: Damn dog! I am not a tree! The dog kept barking, as dogs do not speak. Moral: Numbers speak fluently in most languages though...

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Rick Perry.

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Your face is hilarious.

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Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

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Roses are red Violets are victorious 2 in a chamber Mr pistorius

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How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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What do you call 10,000 black men with their heads sticking out of the ground? Afro-turf

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what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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Prostitution is bad.......

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I was hoping you could tell me–why else would I ask you a question?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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