Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

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nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

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A horse walks into a bar, it gets a concussion. -mattobrado

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Why did the man drop his wallet? Because his palms were sweaty from a long, happy day at the beach with his family after moving into there new home.

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What do you call a black person pushing a car? A very strong human being.

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The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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Q:If pigs ever played basketball, then what sound would they make? A:Oink-oink

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Heroshima

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What is the difference between men and women? Several physical functions such has the reproductive systems, bone structure, and voice pitch.

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How many 3 legged black Irish catholic obstetricians, walking into a bar, does it take to make a chicken cross the road? Fish!

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? Their both purple. except for the rabbit

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Whats the best part about 23 year olds? Theres 20 of them

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Jimmy Saville

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How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

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How many dead babies can you fit in my truck? Thirty-seven and a half;)

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Q: What's bad about 4 asians getting shot? A: There could've been five

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Fine, start by proving to me that you can be a reasonable human being, and I will meet you myself, I have too many of those that rely on my guidance and protection in order for me to send myself off to some suicide mission. Say, are you familiar with the Antony Stark method?

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Roses are red, viotels are blue. God made me pretty, what happened to you?

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professor x walks over to wolverine with good news, he falls and dies of a severe concussion

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If you're riding on a jet ski and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to cover a car? Blue. Because Ice cream doesn't have any bones.

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What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

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Violets are Blue, Roses are Red, skip the bull$%!#, and give me head

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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