A woman leaves the kitchen.

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what happens when u mix a car, a blimp and a plane? I don't know.

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The past the present and the future walk into a bar it made no logical sense that three things that will always contradict each other exist with each other and can walk into a bar without limbs or being alive it wasn't tense it was tree

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A man asks a young woman at a party if a rag smells like chloroform. She doesn't respond because she's passed out. He takes her to a nearby bedroom, rapes her, and leaves the party promptly. He'll probably victimize many other women with this method.

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When god hands you lemons .. you find a new god.

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How does he keep getting girls to sleep with him? Bear-traps..

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What is purple and green at the same time? Grapes, I lied about at the same time.

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What's black and really really smelly? Martin Luther King Jr.'s grave.

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "I'm Japanese". The guy at the counter says "What a coincidence! I am Japanese too." He gets seated and the guy next to him says, "I'm Japanese too." The bar is in Japan.

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a white kid is called on by his teacher he is promptly sent to the principle's office after not complying.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? A Banana. The middle aged man opened the door, prepared to distribute candy to the trick or treaters.

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Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

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A blind man jumped out of the way as a car ran through the red light at a one way street.

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Call of Duty Infinite Warfare

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So a little girl walked into a bar... A concerned adult then told the bartender. The bartender's name was Jim. Jim then asked the girl if she knew her phone number. The little girl said nothing and the bar tender was perplexed at the petrified look on the girls face. Jim the bartender then called the police and explained the situation.Once the girl was brought back to the police station it was learned that she had been missing for three months in a nearby county. The police then return to the bar to find that the owner had multiple kidnapped little girls in a cage under the bar that only he and the kidnapped girls knew about before the cops and Jim the bartender discovered it. The police then arrested The owner of the bar. He stood trial and was senteced to death row, he remains there today.

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What do you call double A's? Batteries

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A gay man takes another gay man home after a wild night at the city's top club. They choose to be safe and not have gay sex.

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what do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question ................

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Q: Whats the difference between a guitar and a piece of ham? A: You can eat a piece of ham.

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What did the white man hand to the mexican? His college degree because the mexican had completed all four years of college with a 4.0 GPA.

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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What do u call a boomerang that doesnt come back A stick

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I pulled a disabled girl in the pub last night. The handle on her wheelchair was caught in my jacket.

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what happens when you mix a black guy and a Mexican? nothing, it is physically impossible to "mix" people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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