What's yellow and smells like piss? Piss

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joe galasso from plainview ny

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Why was the cook arrested? Tax evasion.

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whats green and smells like red paint? green paint

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Why did the blonde leave the lamp on while sleeping? Because it helps to see in case you need to get up in the middle of the night. YOU THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO SAY "BECAUSE THEY'RE A LIGHT SLEEPER!" MUAHAHAHAHAHA

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What did the Africans get for dinner? Nothing.

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Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

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wat did the farmer say to little lucy? I'm about to rape u, don't scream

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Two blondes walk into a building......you'd think at least one of them would have seen it.

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You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

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Knock Knock whose there YOUR MOM

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What's worse than chicken pox? AIDs.

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What was so sad about the white woman who dropped her Starbucks? It fell on her baby in a nearby stroller giving it third degree burns, disfiguring its face.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

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What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

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what do you call aca that got pushed in a pool ? A WET PUSSY

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Your Mama's so fat she need some serious medication treating overweight.

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Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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if quiz is quizzal whats test?

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How did the cat die of indigestion? Indigestion

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Who is a better president, Bush or Obama? Both have their Pros and Cons.

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Why did the war end? Because one country surrendered. They were getting beat pretty bad, it seemed like the only viable option.

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what is red and can grow hair water i lied about it growing hair and that it is red

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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