What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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What looks like half a loaf of bread. The other half

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had AIDS

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i hate it when people repeat the same jokes. i just hate it when people repeat the same jokes.

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A man said hello to a woman. He was italian...

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Roses are gray Vilots are gray im a dog

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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why did the internet crash? it didn't

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What did the boy call the man that kicked the cat? "Sad twat"

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A dying homeless man walks into a Hospital. He is asked to leave because he doesn't have health insurance. He dies in a gutter next to where he shits.

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What worse than rain Osama Bin Laden

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What did the screwdriver do when it was insulted? It got up and walked away.

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How do you upset a builder? Kill all his family.

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Why did the black man scream in church? He felt like it.

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Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

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Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

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Roses are red Violets are blue And so does your mom…

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Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

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why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent

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I just met you! And this is crazy! I just took bath salts, and yor face looks tasty!

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What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe? Fur traders

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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