What's the difference between a black man and a white man? The black man eats chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. I slipped you a roofie, get ready for me.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What time is it? I just looked at my clock on the wall. It is 9:14 AM Eastern Standard Time.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q:Whats funny? A:Genocide

thumb_up thumb_down

Trump will make America great again.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The next person to submit a 'roses are red' 'joke', is cursed to always prematurely ejaculate from here until eternity

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when you cross a hooker with five shots of tequila? Herpes

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did Sally fall off a tree? The tree was a man wearing a tree costume and was sexually assaulting her with his branches. Sally fell off because the cops came and the man threw her down. The tree man is still on the loose. If you have any info please call crime stoppers.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what is red and lies in all four corners of the room? a baby that was playing with a chainsaw.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How did the guy with aids die? He died of aids

thumb_up thumb_down +37

-How do you kill a douche? -You stab him untill he cries out in mercy and stops moving.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? Just about anything because child mortality is not funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +732

What did one salt shaker say to the other salt shaker? Nothing, Salt shakers are merely used to add flavor to foods.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walk into a bar. It happens frequently at UK airports.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call Mary in a wheelchair ... virgin mobile

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +5,477

Did you know that in the country of Nigeria, every minute, 60 second passes?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the sheriff call the death of a black man who was shot 14 times? -The worst case of suicide he'd ever seen.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off and his body was never recovered. Repeat then handled the funeral planning.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops