Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

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What is the most confusing day for chavs? Fathers day

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What do you get when you cross drugs with a bathtub? Whitney Houston's worst nightmare

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Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

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My childhood friend said she had a bad breakup with her husband (yeah husband), and that she needed a really stiff one. Come on! How was I supposed to know she was talking about alcohol! She did blush and smile after I pulled my pants down however, that`s like seven out of ten right? I mean I was just trying to help a friend out right? And myself, fine myself, but it will be a total win/win situation, you know... Those where you win twice? "Dont worry, Im not comming" *pewpew*

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The Sentence Below Is True The Sentence Above Is False

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What did the dog say to the cat? I don't know actually

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There are 3 types of people in this world, those who can count to potato and those who can't.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven beat and raped Six when he was child multiple times, and Seven threatened to kill Six if he told anyone.

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yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

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George Washington delivered a short speech to his troops before they crossed the delaware river. Here it is: "Get in the boat."

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Why did a black man put his hands on a white man? They were hugging.

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How can you kill someone who looks like a squirrel? With an bomb. That would kill most people.

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What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets Wet.

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What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

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What's green , has 4 legs and if it fell out of tree on you , would hurt you ? A Pool table

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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You hear about that old man that died on the news? It was my grandfather... oh...

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Q-whats green and has eyes. A-A frog are you stupid

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whats brown and smells like shit shit

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What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

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Kobe Bryant passing the ball

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CUT MY SOUL INTO PIECES MY NAME IS VOLDEMORT TERMINATION YOU'RE BLEEDING DON'T GIVE A F**K IF I HAVE NO NOSE FOR BREATHING

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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