knock knock you may come in

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the midget say to the other midget? "We're midgets"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man walks into a bar an orders a few pints. He then goes home and brutally rapes his wife and chains his staring kids to a fencepost in the backyard along with their deceased dog named Spot.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What do you call an indian who is underwater? A scuba diver.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the fireman go to the police station? He didn't go to the police station, he went to the fire station.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are red, Bacon is also red. Poems are hard, Bacon.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Three jews walk into a bar. The bar is hosting a bar mitzvah.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

HEYEEYAHEYAYYAEEAHHAAA

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q:If Ryan Vallee walks into a room what do you do? A:Walk out -Ryan V

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Do you believe in love at first site? Or should I walk by again?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What do you call a kite that doesn't fly. A broken kite.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Barack Obama is a good president.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why does six love nine? They both get pleasured

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the duck cross the road? Hurricane Katrina

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the doctor say to the man with cancer? You have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why didn't Bill go to the party? He wasn't invited.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

why is red the first color in the rainbow? I don't know go ask a scientist.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what would u do if you were having anal sex with a black guy and his penis was sooooo big that it ripped ur asshole? staple it back together

thumb_up thumb_down -7

WILLYS

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops