1134

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A husband and a wife were having a conversation: Woman: Why is the baby on fire? Man: I dont know. Woman: BUY ME SHOES!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Tom Petty walks into a bar and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, you are visibly intoxicated. We cannot sell you liquor." The bar explodes because someone said no to Tom Petty.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you get when a bulldog and shitzu reproduce? A litter of extremely cute puppies.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the girl sad? Because she was, you idiot!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Whats worse than losing The Game? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A black guy, a priest, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They order water and chat about life.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the boy with asthma say to his friend I can't breath

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the Africans get for dinner? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what do get when you throw a penny in between a jew and a mexican? nothing besides one less penny

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whoever just posted that suicide shit is stupid, you can get arrested for that shit. I would delete it.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what do u say when u steal something? STOLEN!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +31

wots brown and smells like shite shite

thumb_up thumb_down -19

My computer crashed today I was watching porn.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the bird say to the fence? Chirp.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A mexican Police officer walks into a crime scene. "Ouch." he exclaims, rubbing his forehead where a red bump is already surfacing.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why did tom shut his bedroom door? grandma was fingering herself

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Robin, get in the car!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops