So a man walks into a bar, And because he is dressed in such a way that was thought of as threatening to the general safety of the highly valued customers, he is shot eight times in the head.

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What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

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what is it called when a woman is president. The Apacolypse.

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Whats funnier than a real joke? An anti joke

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Connor "Rusty" McLeod

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Why did the student fail his test? Because he has AIDS

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What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

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What's blue and smells like red paint. ............blue paint.

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A janitor walks into a bar. He cleans the bar.

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Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

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there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

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What do you call a bird with no wings? Dead

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If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken?

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

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what did the green grape say to the purple grape? i'm green.

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numbers just make the funniest antijokes

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why was the man gay? Because its not a choice. its a lifestyle.

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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What did the boy and girl do at the wedding? 69:)

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A man walks into a bar. He proceeds to begin his bartending shift.

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What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

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Where do five gay guys walk? Where ever they choose to. this is a free country, where people are free to travel as they please, despite what their sexual orientation may be. Jerk.

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A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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