How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

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Steve Jobs is alive In our Hearts <3

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A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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wanna here a joke? you.

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Why can't Michael Jackson swim? Because he is dead.

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty-eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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bill goes to the room.. why? to fing a broom riddle boz full of burtiouse.

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So a gay guy walks in a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind, get out." The gay says he will drink in the corner. Later, a construction worker walks into the bar. He says," Man, I'm so thirsty I could drink the sweat off a cows balls." The gay guy in the corners says," Mooooooooo."

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What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

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What happened when the cow jumped over the barbed wire fence? Hopefully it made it over without lacerating its underbelly, thus causing fatal bleeding.

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading another damn "worm in your apple" joke.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun...

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

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How do you stop a bus? Throw a little child in front of it. If the driver is a loaf of bread, this phrase isn't rather important.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his failing marriage.

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Why do Pelicans stand on one leg? Because if they stood on none, they'd fall over.

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Q:What do you say to an albino man that will always get his attention? A:His name.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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