There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

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Q: What did the twin tower say to the other twin tower? A: I'm falling for you.

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How do u save someone from dieing of cancer? U shoot them in the head

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What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

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What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

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What is in the center of our galaxy? Some stars, space, and nebula.

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you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

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If life gives you lemonade.

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why did the girl cross the road? to get away from you

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What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

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what's white and long and hairy? -Dean when hes on his period

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What makes 10 year olds laugh? Se x Jokes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the dog that was chasing it.

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9 Cats on a boat. One Jumped off, how many left? 8.

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What do Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder have in common? They're both well known figures who have inspired many.

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A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears, realizing that his life as he knew it is over, and recognizing the horrible burden he is about to become on his family, both financially and emotionally.

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How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

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Q: Why did the boy go to the orphanage? A: His parents were dead.

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How do 5 gay teenagers walk? In 'One Direction"

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What did the man say to the horse in the bar? Nothing, communication requires listening and comprehension which horses cannot process in their brains. If anything the man said it at the horse, not to him.

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What`s the best part about twenty-three year olds? there are twenty of them

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Why did Justin Bieber bieber his bieber? Because Bieber biebers his bieber when his bieber need a bieber bieber. BIEBER

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Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops