What does Helen Keller order at McDonalds? Food.

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Why do girls enjoy listening to Justin Biebers music? Because he sings moderately well and appeals to a younger audience.

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LIKE FOR GANGNAM STYLE. DISLIKE FOR JUSTIN BIEBER LETS SEE WHO WINS

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Why couldn't Tommy pick up the bunny? Because the bunny was schizophrenic and Tommy wasn't real.

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? Me :'(

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ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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What's the difference between Jews, Muslims & Christians? Religious beliefs.

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A handicapped man rolls into a bar. He buys a drink, talks for a while, and rolls out.

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whats yellow and blue and green all over? the color green

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How do you call the smallest mouse on Earth? James.

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why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

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What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? What's the WNBA?

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What do you do if you walk in on your wife atempting to hang herself in the living room? Ask her to leave the living room, as it would be ironic.

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? NOT SALLY

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what did the woman call the man who ate Ham? A Pig

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Lil Wayne's song 6 foot 7 foot was named after my wewe

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What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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What does a cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? Procedes with his long difficult hunt to find another companion who accepts him for what he is, without the fear of being eaten.

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What do you call a man who is dirty, and is searching through a pile of garbage? A man who threw out his divorce papers.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the fried chicken restaurant... BAWK BAWK cannibal

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Zach Murfitt has a huge penis! Lol jk he has an inchy stryder

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops