Doctor: I'm sorry about your disease, young man. It looks like your time is up. Man: NO! How much time to I have? Doctor: Five. Man: Five years? Five months? Five weeks? Doctor: Four... Three...

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

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A Hispanic, Jew and black man walk into a bar. The bartender tells them to get out because he's closed.

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2 Jews walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks and call a cab to get home

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Killing people is not illegal just ask a soldier

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What's worse than finding a worm in you apple? The holocaust.

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Why was Johnny so sad His father beat his mother

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What do you get when you cross a cantaloupe and a dog? "Melon-choly"

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A horse walked into a bar. Several people got up and left as they spotted the potential danger in the situation. ~Yashar - pirater un compte facebook Peace out :)

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alert("The Game");

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant scorpion.

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What's the difference between Stephani and a momma hippo? The mother hippo is slowly but surely losing weight while Stephani is packing on the pounds! :)

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven.

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I wonder if barrack Obama will rename the whitehouse...to the blue house because it is his favorite color

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawer? we are both lawyers

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Penis, eggs, mushrooms and tigers

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Granny porn!

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Why was Timmy crying when he got home? His family was dead in a pile with a pitchfork going through each of their bodies

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear.

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A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

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What's green and fuzy and could kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

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What would George Washington do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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what do you call a drunk person? By his or her name and call him a cab

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops