hey

What did the man get on his birthday the week before he died? Obamacare

What do you call a blond in a library? A girl that likes to read.

How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

What did the man say when he saw a tornado coming his way? "Oh my god, that's a tornado. I better get out of its way so I don't get injured.

Knock Knock Who's there? I bought a Jeep

You are driving a canoe home when the wheels suddenly fall off. How many pancakes does it take to fill a doghouse?

Roses are der Violets are eulb I am dyslexic

What's blue, cold and makes people cry? A dead baby

once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

What's sad about a dead person? He was my friend.

A man walks into a bar, he says ouch.

Why did the black man die? He was shot

A gorilla walks into a bar and order a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

why was 6 afraid of seven? cause 7's a n i g g a

yo mamas so dumb she named her house butt and her son crack and then she called the police saying I looked all over my butt and i can not find my crack.

Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

A man orders 3,687 bricks. He gets 3,688 bricks delivered to him. He throws the extra brick in the air. Ok, so a man is smoking a cigar by a woman with a small poodle. They are both in a plane. The woman asks the man if he could get rid of the cigar because the smoke is making her dog turn green. The man refuses. In anger, she throws the cigar out of the window. The man gets angry and throws the poodle out the window. What lands in the poodles mouth when it's falling? The brick.

whats worse than a pile of dead babies?...... A carrot

What do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you....you pull the pin and trow it back

Why was little billy sad? He had a crouton stuck up his asshole.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because seven, eight, nine.

Erica is so sexy i want to hump her

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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