Roses are red, Violets are blue, i have Alzheimers, Roses are red

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what gets louder as it gets smaller? a baby in a trash compacter.

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Yo mama is so fat she has a gym membership and a diet plan to lose weight

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Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

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Rebecca Black.

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Why didn't the young child commiserate the death of his grandparents after they were simultaneously crippled by a tremendous avalanche whilst skiing? He didn't exist.

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What do you call a man with an eight foot steel spike wedged in his rectum? An Ambulance

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What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

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YOU

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A man walked into a bar, He then realised that he was likely to become the butt of a joke quite soon and subsequently left to take his kids to the park.

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Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters

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Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

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What do you call someone who's black? A person you asshole.

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A man is walking with a boy through a swamp. The boy says to the man, "I'm scared." The man says, "You think you're scared, I have to walk out of here alone."

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What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

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whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

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what do you call a screwdriver that thinks it'sa hammer? a screwdriver

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Your grandma and your mom drove of a cliff, who survived? Both of them they didn't drive off a cliff

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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what is the differents between a baby and a watermelon one is fun to hit the other is just a watermelon

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding multiple worms in your apple

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Q:If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is here to hear it, will it make a noise A:That Philosopher probably had a lot of herbal tea in the morning

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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