A man walks into a bar and says "I just got back from the battered woman's shelter, and boy are my arms tired" Everyone laughed. The man sat at the end of the bar drinking alone. He was proud of the fine craftsmanship of the shelves he put up in the shelter's pantry, regardless of what others may think.

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

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Why did little justin fall off his bike? because a terrorist threw a fridge at him

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a WAFFLE!

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What looks like a jew, smells like a jew, but claims he isn't jewish? Fletcher Phillips

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Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

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Why was the man sad His son got raped

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Why wasn't 7 afraid of 6? Numbers are numbers and therefore incapable of feeling any emotion.

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"I know it. I can feel it in my nuggets." -Chicken Joe

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Poker? I barely even know her.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? a guy who copies antijokes on ant joke.com

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why did the black man buy a gun? he was a hunter.

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What do caterpillars fear most? Death.

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you know whats worse than cantaloupe? no cantaloupe

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A: u wanna die B: that is a stupid question because unless u are suicidal u will not, retorical or not A: i do wanna die B: u should get some help u freak person a never did get help, while walking to a certivied psychiatrict evaluater he got hit by a truck. his body can be found at the intersection of church and flatbush, brooklyn. JK he got shot, he was in brookly, duh.

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what did one lady say to another lady? we are both ladies

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why did the cow eat a computer? Why? Who knows

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what do you do if you see an asian trip on a step? help him/her up and ask if their alright.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

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Just finished taking a huge $hit, wiped my ass, then realized I wasn't done.

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Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

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Why do Asians get 50% off on movies? They don't.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Banana. Banana who? The Holocaust.

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96 there mad at each other instead its 69

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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