What's straight and famous. Ryan Secrest I was just kidding about the stright

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What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

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A man walk into a bar. Just kidding he has no legs.

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Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Why was the black man fired from the bakery? He didn't work hard and was repeatedly absent

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what happened when u got some swag? i don't know u still don't have any

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One day an Indian boy asked his father why they have such long names? The dad answered him in a such a simple and concise way, that the little boy understood.

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yes... that's the joke

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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how do yopu punish helen keller? Ground her, just like you would with any other child.

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What do you call a black man playing golf? A golfer.

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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A man walks into a bar.

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How many chicken feathers are there in a 50 pound bag? 50 pounds worth Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a duck Why did the man cross the road? It was duck season A woman is dying but can't reach her husband. Why? A duck ate his cell-phone A pig walks into a bar but there is no bartender. Where is she? Dead A duck hunter is selling a duck to a man. The man only pays the duck hunter a quarter. Why? It was full of chicken feathers.

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What's better than winning the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Why did the semen cross the road? Because i put on the wrong socks this morning

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Hey, Max!!

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A fast car that's painted red and green...

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Whats the difference between a black bird and a white bird? Their colour

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What's better than fornicating two 4 year old twins? Killing their parents in front of them before you do.

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When geese migrate, why is one side of the V longer than the other? There are more birds on that side.

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Why was the dog barking? No idea.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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