Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

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Q. Why is the road black? A. One hundred million dollars!

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah Witness.

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I've got 99 problems and they're all stressing me out and causing me to be very unhappy.

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why did the guy cross the road? Because he felt like it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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I ran in to Hitler. "Hey, Hitler, what's up?" I asked. "Well, this time I am going to kill 6 million Jews and 2 clowns." "Two clowns?" I ask. "Why two clowns?" "See!" He exclaimed. "No one cares about the Jews!"

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How do you stop an alcoholic from drinking ? You leave him in the desert for 4 days, eventually he'll die from dehydration .

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

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Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Put M&M's on the bottom of a pool, and tell her to arrange them in alphabetical order. By the time she starts to question this, the poison should be kicking in.

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Why did the black person sit in the back of bus? All the other seats were taken.

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A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

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What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Kill her family.

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how long does it take for a black woman to shit? a couple of minutes.

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What's the difference between a Mercedes and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

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why was the the taxi cab driver having a bad day? because he wasnt making very much money, didnt get alot of customers, some of which were extremely rude, and his entire family just died.

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what has two eyes and a face? the 5 year old who got raped on his way back home last night.

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Q: What is creepy and stares at you when you sleep A: Me

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A man walks into a bar, and promptly leaves because he left his kid in the car.

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What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

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Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so there i must be a pig

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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