Why couldn't the grandma remember what she did last night? Because she has Alzeihmers and grandmas don't do anything.

Did you hear about the woman you got hit by a car? The Driver was intoxicated and had no control over his faculties which cause him to careen off of the road and hit this poor soul as she patiently waited at a crosswalk.

What did the man say to his wife? We are both men. Apart from you.

What's big, old, and brown? A tree.

Your mother is so fat that she is highly likely to get heart disease and/or diabetes.

Finding this website has distracted me and has taken up a large majority of my time.

Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am a dog.

Explain the term 'Standard of Living'? Not having sex with diseased and obese women.

What did the cat say when you rub it's stomach? Nothing because felines don't have the needed vocal organs to speak, and probaly wouldn't know english do to the size of there brain.

they say that cancer can't pass but why do three our your uncles have it

What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

What's worse than 100 dead babies stapled to a wall? 100 live babies stapled to the wall!!!

What do homeless people get for Christmas? Nothing, they are homeless.

Your mother was a hamster, And your father smelt of ElderBerries!

Knock knock! Who's there? The police, we found your cat's body on the side of the road.

Guess Penn State Is Holding Jerry Sandusky Day this Saturday against Nebraska. All Kids 10 and Under get in Free...

Knock knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? The penguin who apparently lives next door and somehow developed the ability to successfully interact with other species through gesture and retoric.

Have you ever just woken up one day and thought, "I don't wanna wear pants today."

What do you call a child that has been stabbed? A dead child

how many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? --probably just one, unless cerebral palsy runs in her blood, therefore her aid would assist her.

Why couldn't the boy talk? He drowned.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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