Knock knock Who is there Banana Banana who Knock knock Who's there Banana Banana who Knock knock WHO'S THERE orange ...orange who Orange you glad I'm a cop here to tell you your family died in a horrible mask murdering and didn't say bannana again?

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When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

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roses are red violets are blue my name is kate boyd im gay

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Roses are roses Violets are violets Sugar is sugar And you're a person

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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Roses are red, Violets are black, Why is your chest, as flat as your back

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Q: Why didn't johnny get any Christmas presents? A: Because he died in a house fire 3 years ago.

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how do u have sex with a really hot girl who is not interested in you? Rape her in a dark ally

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What does Adolf Hitler hate more than Jews? Nothing.

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What's worse than a dead baby falling out of a tree? Two dead babies stapled together falling out of a tree.

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If you're havin' girl problems I feel bad for you son, your mother and I once had those problems but we got through it.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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A generous manager, an honest lawyer, a responsible politician and a dodo bird fall off a cliff. Who survives?. None, they are all long since extinct.

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Q: What do you say to a person in a wheelchair who fall downs the stairs? A: Nothing because most likely they would take an elevator.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

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Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

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Q: What do you call a dad running down a hill? A: A mom running down a hill, I lied about the dad.

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Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

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Why didn't Sammy Robertson make the world series catch to win the series in 1977? Because Sam, like many many discouraged teens in America, didn't follow his life long dream and later became a janitor at his hometown middle-school.

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Scenario: Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub The first one says, "Hey, can you pass the radio please" And the second one replies, "Sorry, my cousins are made of soap."

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus.

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Osama Bin Laden and a monk walk into a bar. Mistaken Identity. It was the Dalai Lama, Osama is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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