Yo momma so stupid, she had you.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

And love is, bein' the owner of a company that makes rape whistles and even though you started the company with good intentions trying to reduce the rate of rape, now you don't wanna reduce it at all cuz if the rape rate declines you'll see an equal decline in whistle sales. Without rapists, who's gonna buy your whistles? Who's gonna buy your whistles? Love is all about whistles.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many chickens does it take for a cow to count on Tuesday? The same reason a horse got fired for seven plus one blue red green.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a guy with alot of money? A rich guy.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Those days where everything goes wrong, and you think to yourself "I just gotta do whats right here"... ...Sigh... 2. DO YOU KNOW WHY I HATE YOU SO MUCH? BECAUSE I HATE YOU! (Blame is on me, love and hate are not opposites, send me a copy of your book, and ill rip it out for you)

thumb_up thumb_down -182

John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why was the little girl crying? Her father has been abusing her and her mother for a year now.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red OMFG MY LAWN IS ON FIRE !!!?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Your Mother is so kind that when I see her I say hello and ask her how she has been

thumb_up thumb_down +93

What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How many dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dogs do not have aposable thumbs therefore they cannot screw in light bulbs

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How do you tell if an albino baby is black? Check his genetics.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Not enough

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why could the kid not finish his homework? Because it flew out the window on the way to his parents funeral

thumb_up thumb_down -10

* anti-punchline

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q:Why was the blond so dumb A: She had downsidrome

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's better than a gold brick? 2 gold bricks.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's brown and smelly? Poop.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

hipsters

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a fox stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops