you wanna hear a funny joke? so do I

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q. What's the difference between a clock and an elephant? A. A clock doesn't have limbs, muscles or a respiratory system.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock Knock Who's there? *silence* Silence Who?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why don't you hit a black guy riding a bike? Because that is dangerous and he could get hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? They were my friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +98

Why did the little girl not speak? It was Anne Frank

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into his house only to find someone in the livingroom touching the stereo. He then goes up to his wife, and kisses her.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the black man run out of the shop with items under his jacket? He was shopping for groceries, when his brother texted him, letting him know that his wife had just gone into labour. He then realised that it was a very miserable rainy day outside and he didn't have an umbarella, so he payed for his items, and ran to his car.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

If I just post the same thing someone else posted and say it was mine, I'm gonna be really popular because everyone is too dumb to realize it's not my original work of genius.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

whats round red and taste like candy? such a thing doesn't exist

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why wasn't the clown funny? He didn't have a face

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? hit him in the head with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's brown and smells like poop? A monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? You take your boots of before jumping on the trampoline!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why is 5 the best number? Because it's alive!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Do I ever ask yo a question that I havn't given you the answer to Mr Hearty.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

John is typing... *2 seconds later" John: Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -1

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops