What's the difference between a dead baby and a pineapple? There will be no funeral for the pineapple..

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If a man has a gun, but no arms or legs, is he armed?

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the tree fall over? The koala forgot to let go.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Someone clearly messed up on naming the flower. Violet is synonymous with purple, Which is obviously NOT blue; It's the mixture between blue and red.

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What do you get when you have 5 Russians, a few 8 year olds, and guns? A kidnapping

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Once upon a time

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What's taters, precious? The potato is a starchy, tuberous crop from the perennial Solanum tuberosum of the Solanaceae family.

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A man walked into a bar. He has been in a coma for six weeks now.

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Why did the girl throw her watch out of the window? because her mind wasn't as intelligent as a normals person mind as she had mental problems.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

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Why is Alan in the hospital? Because he got cancer.

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your mama so fat she should go see a doctor.

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Artichoke is a vegetable state induced by swallowing paint

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How many babies can you fit in a blender? Depends how hard you push.

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Q: What do you call a blonde, a brunette, and a red head all who are 16 years old and standing in a school? A: High School Students

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

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Type 2 diabetics

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What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

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What do you call a man with no home or family? Charles Manson…He currently resides in jail.

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John and Henk are walking down the street. John kills a man, the cops are coming and John runs away. Why didn't Henk ran away? Henk was a rock

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a serious alcohol problem that gave him violent tendencies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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