A black man, a Jewish man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They are all good friends who want to enjoy drinks together.

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How do you make an egg laugh? You can't. Eggs are inanimate objects which are incapable of emotion, thus laughter.

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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What did the friend say to the other friend? A. Hi friend.

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If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

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Q.What happens when you win a trophy? A. You don't, there is always someone better than you.

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Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

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How do you get a jew out of an empty pool? Give him a lader

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? Nickleback.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Can you pass the soda? Sure.

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The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay the manufacturers suggested retail price.

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Why did Bill yell? Because he stepped on a nail.

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Because you killed my Llama. He was my best-friend.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one underneath it. What's worse than that? It has to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It goes back for seconds.

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What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally Why can't Sally finish her ice cream She has no arms How do you fit Sally into a box? Put her in a blender. How do you get her out? A straw.

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THE LOVE SHACK IS A LITTLE OLD PLACE WHERE WE CAN GET TOGETHER!

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John Hammond from 'Jurassic Park' looks like KFC's Colonel Sanders. Which is ironic, since chickens are descended from dinosaurs...

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Why did the mathematician go to jail? Because he killed his wife.

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How do you know your cat is gay? Other cats have buttsex with him

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the kangaroo fall over? Because it fell over the dead koala

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So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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