A duck walks into a bar. He sees Khloe Kardashian sitting on a barstool. The duck runs out of the bar screaming.

Knock Knock Who's there? Boo. Boo Who? Boobies.

Roses are red , Violets Are Blue , i Dont Like rhyming , TITTIES !!

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

How many black people does it take to screw In a lightbulb.....I can't see them.

Your mom is so fat that she should watch her weight and maintain a healthy diet.

Why did the black man run? There was a mass murderer chasing him with a chainsaw.

Three men, a doctor, a lawyer, and a biker were sitting in a bar talking over a few drinks. After a sip of his Martini, the doctor said, "You know, tomorrow is my anniversary. I bought my wife a diamond ring and a new Mercedes. I figure if she doesn't like the diamond ring, then at least she will like the Mercedes, and she will know that I love her." After finishing his scotch, the lawyer said, "Well, on my last anniversary, I bought my wife a string of pearls and a trip to the Bahamas. I figured if she didn't like the pearls, then at least she would have enjoyed the trip, and she would have known that I loved her." The biker then took a big swig from his beer, and said, "Yeah, well for my anniversary, I got my old lady a t-shirt and a vibrator. I figured if she didn't like the t-shirt, then she could go f*** herself."

How Many Blondes does it take to open a fridge. 1 Because most blondes are smart and can open fridges.

An irish man and a lebanese man jump off a cliff who wins? No one it wasnt a race

Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she heard there would be quaffles!

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

how many dead babys can fit in a bathtub 17

There's two bears in the shower. One bear says "pass the soap". The other bear says "no soap. Radio".

Why did the meme cross the road? MEME XD

How long did it take azaha to have a shit? Nine months

Why did the old lady walk across the road? She was on her way to the convenience store on the other side.

What did the Pope say to the little boy? Look both ways before crossing the street

mmm i love marble bumhole

What's better than nailing a baby into the wall? Football.

roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

An Israeli, a Palestinian and an American walk into a bar. The Israeli shoots the Palestinian and says it was self defence. The American agrees with him.

What's the difference between a battered woman and a regular woman. There is absolutely no difference...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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