Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

What's worse than a dead baby? A baby.

Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

What do you call a blonde girl with ponytails? A cheerleader.

Why did people have cold showers in the old days? Because there was no electricity back then, making it hard to heat water to a temperature that was classified as 'warm'.

how do u get a nun off the bottom of a cruise ship you untie her

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being brutally murdered as you are watching your guts spilling out of your body

What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock eater,

what looks like a bug, lives in larch mount and lives in a mansion? Aodhan Hearty, lied about the mansion... he lives in a web with his buggy family

what goes round , and round , and croaks? a blender in a frog.

Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

What do you get when you mix monster, coke, and and seltzer? Kicked out of stop and shop.

How did you feel after smoking that joint? I felt like going to pass out And then? I passed out

What do you call a dog with no legs Nothing it won't come

Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wait, what? huh

A professor of literature asked me, "Young Sir, why are you burning those books?" I replied, "Because I need a fire to cremate the bones of your 3 sisters that I violently raped and murdered" He smirked in a witty and arrogant fashion, until raising his head and saying, "Bond, James Bond" He continued to massage his dick with his own pubic hairs before collapsing and dying

got a new boxing bag the other day its hanging from the top of my stairs its called dead seb

WHATS WORSE THAN THE HOLOCAUST A FLAT TIRE

Roses are Blue Violets are Red Watermelons are green Refridgerator

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

Knock knock Who's there Ummmm....me u r looking right at me O yeah Ummm... Now what U knocked? No. O Ye Ok Alright cya

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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