Whats the difference between dinosaurs and skittles? Dinosaurs were killed out hundreds of thousands of years ago when skittles on the other hand are sugery candy that people eat when they are craving a sweet treat

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What happened to the black man when he was eating a Tootsie Roll? He ate the entire thing but was still hungry due to the empty calories.

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Why did the man fall off of his bike? Because he is a Sikh who was mistaken for a muslim after the events of 9/11. His neighbors for 5 years have turned on him and now are throwing rocks at him to alleviate their anger while he is biking to his minimum wage job as a janitor at the local burger king, trying to make money for a family that doesn't love him anymore

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What do you call a girl with ADD and too much free time? Me

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What did the blonde do when her car broke down? Made a Facebook status about then called animal control.

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Why was the kid late for his dentist appointment? He was abducted and he's been missing for thirteen days

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Roses are red Violets are blue My friend has diabetes Stop posting diabetic jokes

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Why is jim retarded? Because he fucks chickens

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How many small children does it take to change a light bulb? None. Children are not old enough to do this by themselves.

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Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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TOP KEK

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What did the children say when the magician pulled a rabbit out of his hat? Nothing, but the parents called Animal Control, and the magician was imprisoned after a dog-fighting ring was discovered in Michael Vick's estate.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? To save the endangered child from getting hit by a car across the street.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It escaped the zoo.

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What's bigger than a whale and has no water? Africa.

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Why is Obama's name Obama? Obama

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Man #1:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: I don't know Man #1: Because he died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Because he died? Man #1: Yep. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Really? Come on, I've already answered your stupid question. Man #1: JUST ANSWER! Man #2: Fine, because he died. Man #1: No, peer pressure. Duh. Man #2 promplty punches Man #1 in the face and continues about his buisness.

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Women's rights

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the duck walked in the bar then he walded away

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A blind man walks into a bar. It was a book shop.

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What did the Germans cook in their giant oven made for cooking jews? Jews.

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Q: What's worse than seeing a scorpion A: being stung by that scorpion

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why did logan cross the road? to get raped by his father again

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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