Why did the blind man die? He had eye surgery and the doctor told him when he first opened his eyes there would be a very bright light, turns out he also had alzheimers and wandered onto the train tracks

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Sex! Sex Who? Sex with me. BOOM!

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Why do immigrants move to the UK? To seek a better life

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Noideer! No.Blind What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still Noideer! No, it's basically dead

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What's invisble and smells like bananas? My mailbox.

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What do you get when you cross a sheep with a lion? A dead sheep.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A man walks into a bar, and says to the bartender, "Do you know where the library is located?" The bartender describes to him that the closest library is three blocks down, next to the red brick building with a green roof.

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How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

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What is the difference between the number 20 and 21 1

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? A friendly individual who cares nothing about racial differences and instead judges people based on character.

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What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause he wanted to get squashed by the giant pancake.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the little boy? May God be with you.

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Whats pink and screaming? a skinned baby in a bucket of vinegar+

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Little Jimmy was afraid, and didn't like Santa Claus. So one Christmas Eve, he poured rat poison in Santa's milk. Little Jimmy no longer has parents.

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What is the favorite song of Lady Di? no, that is a dead person and must be respected.

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Whats big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

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Why don't women like to have penises? Evidently women have different tastes than men in what body parts they enjoy having.

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A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

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Why are black people good at basketball? Because they train hard and practice daily.

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When A White Man Sees A Magic Trick - He Claps When A Black Man Sees A Magic Trick - He Does Handstands, Celebrations, And Shouts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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