What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

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Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

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The ability to live the life of a dead person.

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What do you call a cow with no legs. Dead, the farmer cut them off.

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What's young and not funny? Todays anti-joke writers.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, suck my tip and call me Regi.

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Trashcan!

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What did the Blind man say to the deaf man? Nothing, he doesn't know sign language

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Why did the man visit 4chan? He heard about it from a coworker and was curious about what it was.

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What happens when you light a truck full of babies on fire and drive it off a cliff filled with lava and set off explosives when they land? The babies die. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

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Johnny just finished his pie.

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two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

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What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

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Tim and Jim are Telling Jokes Tim: Knock Knock ... Jim does not respond because Tim has a mental disorder causing him to believe in hypothetical doors and thus ignores him so that he does not upset his friend

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Knock Knock! we have a door bell ...ding dong. its broken.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

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Roses are red, Violets at blue. My mind is twisted, Bend over bitch your about to get fisted.

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GUYS LISTEN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WANT THIS TO BE THE MOST DISLIKED JOKE EVER !!!!!!!! PLEASE :) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A blind man walks into a bar with a guide dog in one hand and his girlfriend in the other. The bartender says "Nice dog." The blind man says "Thanks."

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What did one Stoner say to the other? "I'm hungry, let's order pizza."

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. Seeing a black pilot is not alarming. If their middle-eastern, however, you have more of a problem.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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