Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the Football Coach go to the Bank?? To Cash his Paycheck.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a black astronaut? An astronaut you racist

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A jewish man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder, the bartender asks "where'd you get that" the man replied "at a pet shop"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Put chromosomes in advertising. Because you know, Sex Cells

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the bartender say to the bugatti owner? "Don't drink and drive"

thumb_up thumb_down +40

do you wanna hear a joke school

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a bunch of Mexicans on fire? Jumping Beans.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Four brothers joined the army and were deployed to Iraq. Two of them committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Q: why did the black guy die? A: he got shot

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why does Mario wear coveralls? Because it makes practical sense for his full time job as a plumber.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she had leprosy and had to have her legs and arms amputated

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Two muffins are being baked in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin "Boy, it sure is getting hot in here," and the other muffin replies "yeah, that's because it's an oven."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

When does a cat not land on its feet? When it has paws.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How do you call a guy with a school bus on his head? Dead. It's highly unlikely that a man would be able to withstand the weight of a massive school bus on his head and survive.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

one time someone wrote an anti-joke, hoping for lots of likes, which give one a sense of validation. nope.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the penis enter the vagina? They were trying for a baby

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops