How many babies can you fit in a toilet? To be exact you would have to do all this math, so I tested it out myself and got 7.6.

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Q:whats big white and falls out of trees A:a refrigerator

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What do you call Batman with a knife in his chest? Dead

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Knock knock Who's there? Nobody Oh, ok

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Three men walk into a gay bar, and have a great time because they're all of consensual age and brought condoms for safe sex.

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What do you call a man with an eight foot steel spike wedged in his rectum? An Ambulance

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Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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What has four legs and rocks? Your baby kitten that just got stoned to death.

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What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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There once was a man from Bangkok, who hated limericks.

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Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Elton John? They're both gay.

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What do Miley and Billy Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

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Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

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Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing duplicates of the top jokes.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a toaster. A lot of things.

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What's the difference between a Watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer, the other is a watermelon.

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Sigh... You know life, you start all optimistic and "I am going to be wealthy mommy and stuff" Then you know, life turns not quite out like you planned it, and, well, you wish you had made some other choices you know what I mean... Your grades where not that good, that girl you really loved did not like you back, you know what I mean right? ...Well I don't, how is it like?

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It is cruel to want a "sky full of lighters" as, according to the Laws of Gravity, the lighters will eventually come back down to earth and incinerate everything below them.

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What's made of wood and has an eraser? a 2x4 i lied about the eraser.

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How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

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How do you get a child off a swing? Throw a fridge at him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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