Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. You know why it didn't? Because it wasn't a chicken. It was a dog.

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What do you call a building full of Mexicans? JAIL.

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How do you get rid of black elephants? Arrest it for being black.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Ask him to come down.

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F@ck me in the ass until I say STOP. Before we start, can you please ducktape my mouth?

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Why did i write this joke? Because i'm a try hard.

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What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

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racism...deal with it!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Even though I can't tell Because I am color blind

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

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Think of your favorite joke. Thats so weird! Thats exactly the same as this joke!

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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a show horse jumps over a bar

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Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? He was busy

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Depending on the amount of saliva you produce each lick the answer to this question varies species to species.

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Your mom is so nice.

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roses are red, violets are blue.

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You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

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friends are like potatoes. if you eat them, they die.

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how do you confuse a blonde? shes already confused Leave.Her.Alone.

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Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

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How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

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how do you get a 1 armed moron out of a tree? you wave

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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