So this guy walks into the doctor's and says "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor says "Yes, you've shattered both your kneecaps. You'll never walk again."

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What do you call someone with no arms, one leg,and an eye patch? names

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Why do migrant birds fly to the south? Because they can't get there on foot.

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How many kids with Asperger's does it take to change a light bulb? Tyrannosaurus lived in the Cretaceous Period.

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How do you make a baby cry? You punch him him the gut and slap him multiple times.

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How do you kill a fashion icon? First make sure their blonde and stupid like most. then take a barstool preferably or what ever is closest then........ WACK HER IN THE EMPTY SPOT WHERE HER BRAIN SHOULD BE.

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What's orange, brown, and blue? An orange, brown, and blue object.

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If you peel my skin off, I won't cry, but you will. What am I? A human being with a high pain threshold.

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whats the difference between a snail? - both legs are the same lenght, especially the left one.

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Whats funnier than 24. ... DEEZ NUTS.

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A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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What does a plum and a rabbit have in common? A: they're both purple, except for the rabbit!

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Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

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Girlfriend has 10 letters, but then again, so does freeeeedom

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"Do you live in the United States?", said the man. "no." said the other man, "cool beans", said the woman.

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"Knock, knock." "You don't have to say that. The door's open, come on in."

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On a scale of Casey Anthony to Jerry Sandusky how much do you like kids?

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I enjoy owboy butt sex with big black men please call me at 9528579236

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What is red and green, red and green, red and green? A frog in a blender.

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What do you call the branch of Science that separates the organism's race? RACISM

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what didn't Jon go to the movies? He tripped and broke his neck and cant look up

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was disowned by his family due to his drug addiction and had nowhere else to go.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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