why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

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why are you people on anti-joke? BECAUSE you have NO LIFE !

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why was little johnny laughing all day cactus

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The meme walks out of the bar.

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I like my women like I like my coffee, I don't like coffee.

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What did the man with cancer say when he got hit in the face with a crowbar? "Ow."

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Make it? Sodium levels? Means he is eating right? Its not ADHD, the chatter is his way of coping with pain and what I believe is PTSD (dont tell him, he would get mad, if he gets that blank stare while chatting a lot its like he is back in the past for a while, please distract him out of it, but dont tell him anything about that. Give him what he wants, its a secret but Nero masters hypnosis, and he pretty much knows himself to a point far beyond others know themselves, he can sense lies and knows how others are feeling just by the movement of their pupils, their eyes, their breath, the tonality of their voice and lots of things like that, I think thats some sort of hypnosis as well, he uses ritalin in order to focus and shut off pain receptors mentally and stuff I don't understand, I am sure he would not ask for it unless he knew he could take it, he has literally performed surgery on himself before, the kind that would kill anyone unless under strong anesthetics. (removed bullets from the back of his skull, people say its just a myth, but I was there so I know its true) Please trust me on this as weird as it might sound.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his head

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Jack and Jill went up the hill To fetch a pail of water Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill called the paramedics

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Ill admit it Nero, although you act like a savage you make a fine statement there, maybe we will ask her to join one time huh?

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My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

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Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

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Why did the girl cross the road ? Because i was following her.

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What did Susie do when the music was too loud Nothing

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ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

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Roses are red Violets are blue Black people are black They are inferior

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When life gives you melons, youre probably dyslexic.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

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What do you call a man who never farts in public? A private tooter!

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What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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Why did the bud driver drop his ice cream? Because he hit a boy.

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it smells like up dog in here. whats that?

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what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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