Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he died.

A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

Knock Knock Nobody answered because the people in the house were away.

Why aren't elephants allowed in public pools? Because they are elephants.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin get in the Batmobile.

Why'd The Little Kid Drop His Ice Cream Cone? Because He Witnessed His Mom get Raped in front of his house by the man driving the ice cream truck and the realized that he was licking frozen semen......

What do you call a man with a black book? I don't know.

Vegeta, What does the scouter say about his power level? It's Over 9000!!!!!

why did the black guy win a gold medal in the olympics? hard work, dedication and determanation! what no one else can be bothered to do anymore because of all this new technology and stuff!! get of your arse and do something active. NOW!

What's worse than a dead man?  2 dead men

What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to their son who got an A- in algebra? How do I know? I don't speak Chinese!

knock, knock no one answers man goes home and shots himself because he feels alone

How come Emmet Till never attended college? Because he was brutally murdered.

Why did the frog cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

you are gay

why did the black man die? the man bled out, and doctors did everything they could.

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Drive an ax through its head.

What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

How I seem math word problems Scenario: 2 astronauts kayaking in the Sahara desert Question: How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse Answer: Purple, because ice cream has no bones

Knock, knock Who's there? The electrician And about bloody time too, you'd better come in.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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