What did the parents say to their kid? You're adopted and we don't love you.

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There once was a man from Nantucket.

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What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

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A man walks into a bar, sits down and talks to the woman sitting next to him. The woman took out a cigarette, and offered one to the man. The man said yes, even though he never smoked before, because he was trying to get with the woman. They smoked a few more before the woman left, and the man left shortly after. The man became a chain smoker and died 1 year later from lung cancer caused by smoking multiple packs a day.

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What is funnier then a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown!

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How do you call a gay that is playing poker with friends You say "call" and place the right amount of fiches on the table, at that moment you are still in the race to win the pot.

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A man walked into a house, He never came back out as he fell down the stairs and snapped his neck, His family mourn him everyday.

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Today my friend was surprised at the black joke I told today, but I can tell that joke because most of my closest friends are white.

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Once a upon of time, cow said chicken go cluck. Years later, mustard was like a ketchup. I said it was good. Oh yea baby. It was a good day.

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What did the man say to the woman he was in love with? Sure, I understand and I'm okay with being just friends.

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Thank you, you remind me that I am not insane, just because I believe we humans can accomplish more, by uniting as one, rather than fighting one another. I feel as if I belong somewhere else, yet the question remains always, are people such as you better, or are we relics from the past?

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Why did the Nazi doctor drown a Jew in the lake? Because he felt like it.

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Who is blue and smells like green paint? Matt Daly

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how do you stop a bus? shout FOR ALLAH!

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what happens when you get ben roethlisberger, and a young college student? a very pleasant evening, helping ben cope with all the drama he has been in the past year leading him to the 2011 super bowl against the green bay packers.

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What do you call a woman that is on her period? -A girl that is expirencing a difficult to control flow of blood through the clitorus.

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Why was the black guy in jail He was a jail guard

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Why couldn't the girl swing on the swing set? She had no arms.

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Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

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why is nick a dumb ass? because hes not a smart ass

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My name is Jeff

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What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

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What were the muslims doing on the plane? Probably going somewhere that was too far to walk or drive.... just like everyone else on the plane.

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What do you call a guy who accidentally cut off his hand in a blender? Stupid.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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