Is that a banana in your pants or do you just have an abnormally large penis?

Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

What do dogs and cats have in common? They eat dog food, accept for the cat.

Why was the Jewish man celebrating cinco de mayo? Because he likes other cultures and Mexican food Except pork

why did sally fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock? who's there? not sally.

Why did the priest fall onto the alter boy? Because he lost his balance

If somebody stabs you in the forehead, you are likely to get injured.

Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. She didn't. She's still in the kitchen because I beat her if she's not cooking or cleaning.

Roses are Expensive. Violets are Gay. Poems are for pussies... Have a nice day!

Two muffins are in the oven, one muffin says "Gosh it's hot in here!", the other muffin says "HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN!".

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died

Knock Knock Who is it? Me, I forgot my keys on the way out oh ok...

what's the difference between northerners and southerners? southerners live to the south of birmingham, and they don,t stink of urine.

Two muffins were in an oven. One muffin said "Wow, its hot in here." The other muffin said "Oh my gosh a talking muffin!" The house burnt down because the oven created a fire.

dj miky

What did Christopher Colombus say to his men before they boarded the boat to sail around the world? Get on the boat.

Q) What did one chicken say to the other? A) Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

How are humans like slinkies? - They are not good for very much and bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs!

Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

Why didn't the kid return home after school? He was having a sleep-over with a bunch of his friends. Who all died from a robbery.

Why did hitler kill all the Jews? He is racist

Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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