What did the kid with cancer get for his birthday? Nothing he didnt make it that far

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is blind, deaf, and dead.

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A Serbian Film

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Beware of orange frogs with black stripes! They are dangerous! On the other hand, if you see a black frog with orange stripes, you're in no danger.

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Wanna know how to confuse a blonde? No. I wanna know which way you would prefer to die.

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What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

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A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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What did the dying mother give her newborn child? AIDS

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him to leave.

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Why couldn't Billy write his own name... ...because he was wearing purple lemonade???

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Do you know who's gay? Homosexuals.

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tom pauling

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Why did my cat die? I drowned it in the bath.

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Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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Smoke weed till i die nigga

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Q:How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? A:Depends on the volume of said tub.

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There once was a man from Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe He then shortly died in his sleep due to heart failure at the age of 81.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven was a registered sex offender.

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Wanna Hear a joke.... Corey Jacobs is a FAT ASS

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whats one word that gets everyones attention? rapist,bomb,and sex

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yo momma's so dumb she attended a dyslexic test and was proven mildly autistic.

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Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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