What did the man do after he found out his wife died in the Titanic? He cried.

Where do fat girls go to eat doughnuts? Jenny Craig

Why did the chickens leave McDonalds? Because they refused to have their nuggets deep fried (Wyndellberg)

TROLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOL

Your momma's so fat that she should probably be worried about the increased risk of cardiovascular disease.

What did the man say when he was asked if he recently saw a mime painting a lawn chair in the middle of December? "No." , and walked away, slightly confused by the matter.

You: What gets wetter and wetter the more it dries? Person: A towel?! You: No, an aquaphilian woman drying off a car ;)

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being raped

What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

What is yellow and writes? -A Ball Point Banana!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Henry: Say the word "really". Moe: Really. Henry: Now say the word "really" with sarcasm. Moe: Really? Henry: More sarcasm! I want you to be very sarcastic! Moe: Oh really??? Henry: There ya go!

How many dead babies can you fit in a trash can? 12

How can you make a little boy tell the truth? Threaten to murder his family.

If John had eight apples and he eats three. Calculate the mass of the sun.

whats the one about not giving a crap? oh yea this one

So my girlfriend comes back from Jamaica this weekend. There are as many hairs per square inch on your body as a chimpanzee.

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

what did barrack obama say to the jew osama bin ladins a bitch

... and so the rabbi says "Don't worry. It was a kosher pickle anyway."

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face.

What do you call a room with an oven and ten Jews in it? A kitchen.

Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

What did the dog say to the mailman? nothing, dogs lack the mental capacity for human speech therefore he was unable to communicate his message verbally

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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