What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Well I dont think that has happened to anyone ever so I guess nothings worse.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's funny about a blond, a brunette, and a red-head, drunk in a Cadillac? Everyone knows integration is a myth.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A person was born on may 5th 1955 and one day noticed that they had $555.55 in their bank account. The person went to a race and betted all their money on the 5th runner in the 5th race. What happened? The runner came in 5th place.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

There once was a man from Bangkok, who hated limericks.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

hi

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why was the woman blind? Because she couldn't see

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A black man is setting up contingency measures of protection in his personal place of residence when all of a sudden, several warning alarms sound and a few specialized people with red "combating" devices who were alerted by the blatant scenerio unfolding before them were moving quickly in order to match previously stipulated criteria of value. The black man and his family were partaking in a monthly fire drill unfolding in their own house since they were extremely responsible, law-abiding citizens of the city they were located in that required various kinds ofl saftey precautions to be taken so to mitigate the serious chance that people might be hurt by preventable, residential distasters.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the Jew have so much money? He had a good education and therefore, a high paying job.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Morgan Freeman walks into a bar. Everyone is pleasantly surprised they are in the presence of a celebrity.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what happens when I bought a car. A man stole it from me and killed my family.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Why was the phone wearing glasses? It lost its contacts!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why was six afraid of seven? The world may never know.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

"the president is black, my lambo's blue..." no hes not, hes bi-racial.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Knock knock Who's There? Me I kill you again HA HA HA

thumb_up thumb_down +7

your face

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbour. My neighbour who? Timothy, welcome to the neighbourhood!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A Man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The Bartender proceeds to unload a 30 round banana clip into his head, neck, and midsection.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's the difference between a white man and a black man? The colour of their skin.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

So there were these two ovens in a muffin. One oven said "Holy fuck it's muffiny in here." The other oven said "Holy fuck a talking oven!"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops