Why did Timmy fall off his bike? Someone threw a brick at him!

Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

Knock, Knock! Go away!

Q.what do you call a dead baby? A. a dead baby

what do you call a dead baby in a blender? -taken care of. by: Calee^_^•

If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

I ran in to Hitler. "Hey, Hitler, what's up?" I asked. "Well, this time I am going to kill 6 million Jews and 2 clowns." "Two clowns?" I ask. "Why two clowns?" "See!" He exclaimed. "No one cares about the Jews!"

A man walks into a resteraunt and joins his friends. Then he realized he had no friends. ~YN~

This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well crap whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall of the second time? I pushed her.

Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

How do you blindfold an Asian person? With a blindfold

Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

'Dyslexic man walks into a bar... and orders a pint

How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue shotgun How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose and shoot it with a blue shotgun.

The Olympics

How did Suzy die She choked on a Pick-Up Truck

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

What's funnier than 24? 25

banana

Knock knock Who's there? No Who is over there

whats worse that finding your having sex with your long lost sister? having sex with your long lost brother

Me-Whats long and hard and full of seaman Him-a submarine Me-No dumb ass a dick

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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