A dyslexic pervert asks to see a woman's bar. Then he is chased to the bra next door.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did the boy drowned Bc he couldn't swim

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: What's worse than a dead baby? A: A dead baby with diarrhea.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Yo momma so fat she should be concerned of contracting Coronary Heart Disease, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, abnormal blood fats, metabolic syndrome, cancer, osteoarthritis, sleep apnea, or even obesity hypoventilation syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +14

so a horse walks into a bar and the bartender syas why the long face and the horse says naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They beat her mercilessly.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

http://api.solvemedia.com/papi/media?c=2@4kVxPaRsBr6xmKYFf1AWrnUekZ5Qm16e@VS0Tc9Os5q8ENU8bgrSzdX9APTC4lJjowvMEvv53MnevBtoOvXkqvmo6q3GRjryi4pBIcsYECoiZmERhCMm3t7otsPlwyu31uNcluNyw3UKXeBeML2ZQF3X3Wfs3WC6Cdp-lOv-Y0fRdSiML4k2yPqmVJrbT.a9hCr0BoWsRJvq7n7aejLjOmz3h3eZDdwJaN54pFV-QOvO5sQ5wVZlVq-2yi9hMbBbb213AoVTT7vLIhTq0xcBFvtuMdWdS2jn2ActORr3W16MmSEVcgrS6gA;w=300;h=150;fg=ffffff;bg=5d216b

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What person looks most like Jim Carry? Jim Carry

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why can't Michael Jackson swim? Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Snausages.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Who are the faster readers? New Yorkers, they through 110 stories in 5 seconds

thumb_up thumb_down +13

so there are two muffins in an oven. one muffin says to the other muffin, "hey is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin says, "holy sh*t your a talking muffin."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the college student do during her Spring Break in Mexico? We're not sure, she never came back.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you do to get someone to shut up? You hit with a brick

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? Their skin color.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats worse than a dead dog? 5 dead babies and a dead dog...

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A duck walks into a bar Its theoretical comical universe implodes from the destructive weight of inevitable punchlines and everyone in the bar dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

knock knock. whos there? the IRS you have recently filed for bankruptcy and we are repossessing your house.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats brown and sticky? Poop on a warm summers night.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did one wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls are inanimate objects and thus incapable of conversing with one another.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Your mother is so fat that she is highly likely to get heart disease and/or diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops