Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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How do you see a black man in the dark? You dont

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What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

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What do you get when you cross Bambi and a ghost? Bamboo

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Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

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What did the Mexican parents name their first born son? Nobody knows. He was adopted by a nice family due to the fact that his biological parents were murdered in cold blood. His foster parents named him Kevin.

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How do you get a dog and a baby mixed up? You stir your chili.

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Why did the Nazi doctor drown a Jew in the lake? Because he felt like it.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Well it all started when 7 did something horrible to 8 and 9. Always being used for various things and never getting credit, 7 finally snapped one day at the office. He went home for lunch, which was uncharacteristic for him. He came back with a large duffle bag and a trench coat on. He walked into the the middle of the office and opened the bag and trench coat. The events that followed are now known as the office slaughtering of 1992. 7 ended up gutting 8 alive and eating its intestines. 9 was forced to watch then inch by inch was cut up. His heart was ripped out and shown to him before he died. The body was then thrown into acid, and 7 hung himself with piano wire, but lived. 7 also has herpes and 6 doesnt want anything to do with that shit.

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I saw a mexican drowning and saved him... as my screensaver ;)

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Why did the white guy sit on the toilet? So he could take a poop.

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A blind man sits down to read Anti jokes Whoops my bad

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What if Chuck Norris got shot by a bullet? The most interesting man in the world would save him.

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Ching Chong Chinaman is sitting on a wall. People make fun of his name because it is so unusual.

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What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside. A BMW doesn't have pricks on it's bodywork, for a multitude of reasons: - it would increase the coefficient of drag, causing an increase in fuel consumption - the pricks would fall foul of pedestrian safety regulations

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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A man walks into a bar. He is a diabetic and promptly goes into a coma after drinking.

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How do you drown a blonde? Tie a cinderblock to her foot and throw her in water.

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What do the holocaust and new born babies have in common? Nothing. Except some babies are born in Germany.

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What did the ocean say to the other ocean????? What Nothing they just waved ???? Oh Do you sea what I did there ???? No I'm shore you did ???? By Erin

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What's worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

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What do you call a blind, crippled, child? Unlucky.

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"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" "It's who's." The grammar nazi has struck again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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