How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

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Coke or Pepsi? Trick question, beer.

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What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

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What did the blind, deaf and mute girl get for christmas? Cancer.

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Q: Why did the officer stop the black SUV? A: Because it was going way over the speed limit.

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why did the 1st koala fall out of the tree ? it was dead why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by the first koala why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree ? it thought it was a game why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by a fridge why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree ? it was inside the fridge

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A woman gets in her car to drive.

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One day a boy asks his teacher what blue velvet is then the teacher says "we don't ask questions like that in my class go to principal's office now"so the boy goes to the principal's office and then the boy asks "what is blue velvet"then the principal says"no one says that in my school get out" so the boy goes home and asks his mom what is blue velvet then his mom says you don't say stuff like that in my house get out!so the boy see's the Mayer. So the boy asks the Mayer what blue velvet is then the Mayer says no one says that in my town get out of my town! So the boy see's a man and the boy goes to the man and the man asks what happend to you and the boy says well I got kicked out of school kicked out of my house and got thrown out of town just because i asked what blue velvet is! So the man tells the boy that there is a lady across the street. So the boy is in the road and then the boy gets ran over and dies. So the lesson here is look both ways before crossing a street

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Well you see....

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How do you get 10 babies out of a blender? Potato Chips! Stupid!!!!

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

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What is worse than failing a class? Dress up for grown-ups.

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What did the dyslexic boy get for Christmas? A laptop. And he was very happy.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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What do you put in a toaster? Bread, or sometimes a small penis.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, you tell me.

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

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A blond walks into McDonalds. She orders and leaves.

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What's the difference between Donald Trump and a refrigerator? Open a refrigerator and you will find food, typically refrigerated food like milk, eggs, you know, stuff like that.... When you open Donald Trump you will be charged with murder.

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Whats worse than the Holacaust? Stepping on damn Lego's. MrBounty44

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"Everyone be very quite. Dont say a word or well get eaten by the big, fat stupid ugly fat faced dinosaur in that cave over there." "A word or well get eaten by the big fat stupid ugly fat faced dinosaur in that cave over there." "Look how clever Charles is now were all screwed."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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