What type of ruler lies? A shatter resistant one

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What did the man with tourettes yell on an airplane? He yelled bomb, and was gunned down by 2 federal marshals, one of which's stray bullets happened to hit a small child with autism.

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Why did ned fall out of the tree? Because he was hit by a koala.

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I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

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Why couldn't the bird fly? cause it was a penguin

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how did the ant die? i stepped on it

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ask me if im a tree! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Vancouver Canucks Hater: What time is? Another Vancouver Canucks Hater: 6 past Luongo

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks.

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You know what you can do with your offer to 'help'? Await another opportunity please I appreciate it much.

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Why doesn't God answer prayers? God does answer prayers, but He does not want you to have everything you want just by asking it, He wants you to work for what you have, everything happens for a reason. ... Nah, it's because God does not exist.

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Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

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Yo momma so lazy she hasn't been to work in weeks and you no longer have electricity or food.

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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What's the difference between a trash can full of dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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Yo mamma so fat not even Dora can explore her

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Don't make my new Nazi friend upset, or he'll be Fuhrerious

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I AM DISSAPOINTED

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Why did i write this joke knowing i wont get published? I don't know.

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy This song doesn't rhyme PENIS

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Why are some people so good at basketball? Because they are all black.

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Yo Mama so ugly I don't know how she found your dad.

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Why didn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff? She was wearing Mittens

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What's worse than Bogans? Boat people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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