Until further notice Penn State's take your child to work day has been canceled.

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Jimmy tells his mom he wants to be a Firefighter when he grows up to which the mother replies, "You can't Jimmy, you have leukemia."

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What do you call a orphan with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Scrood

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Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Apple. Apple who? Apple juice.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling

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What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting constantly tortured for hours non-stop by getting your eyebrows plucked out one by one and getting your teeth pulled out and getting your arms cut open by a razor and getting your nose twisted off and getting your nipples ripped off by a pair of pliers and getting your toenails scraped off by a knife and getting a needle shoved into your eyes and getting a sword stuffed up your arse and getting your penis split in two like a hotdog and getting your balls smashed up by a sledgehammer so the sperm inside goes everywhere. I think that would be worse than dropping a dollar down the drain.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf a bread

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How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2.

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Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative.

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What is wrong with racism? A lot of things.

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Okay.

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What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They were caucasian artists.

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Q) A Christian, slightly disabled but perfectly capable man has a packet of Jaffa Cakes. He strolls casually toward the edge of a cliff, rapidly checking his watch. The man slowly examins the packet before gradually opening the packaging. First the box, then the packet. He quickly throws the jaffa cakes over the edge of the cliff, Why? A) The man doesnt like jaffa cakes

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Why does it take women to cum slower than men? Who cares

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That's a rhetorical question chickens don't cross roads!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Adolf Hitler.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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How can you make a little boy tell the truth? Threaten to murder his family.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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What did santa claus get the boy with cancer for christmas? Nothing. Santa is not real and thus incapable of granting christmas wishes.

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What does the latin maid does when I tell har to clean behind the couch? Nothing, she doesn't speak English.

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What would Micheal Jackson do if he were alive today? THRILLER! THRILLER! THRILLERS NIGHT!

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who's specky and stinks of shit? josh moran

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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