Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Whats small white and has a hole in it? A powdered Donut

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I like my coffee how I like my women Without a penis

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Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

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Your mom is so fat, she went to the hospital, and they intern, turned her exess fat into 12 babies.

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What lumpy and pointy? A horny woman with breast cancer

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What is more black than a Nigerian marathon runner? The night sky

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time and Santa Claus is a very jolly fellow who brings gifts to the homes of the good children during the late evening and overnight hours of Christmas Eve.

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Siri, what is your definition of love? "Let me check on that...Here's what I've found." Google.com search = definition of love

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A: What are the nine most terrifying words in the English dictionary? B: What are they? A: I'm from the government and i'm here to help

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Want to hear a joke? Obama

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What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

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What's the difference between a horse and a gorilla? Their penis size. Horses have relatively large penises, while gorillas are known to have the smallest penises proportional to their body size.

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how did the horse fall into the river? he sliped

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I forgot how to throw a boomerang and then it came back to me.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Where it had just witnessed a horrific car accident involving it's spouse, who died on impact. Eventually the chicken fell into a deep depression, taking it out on his children in the form of physical abuse. Over time, the chicken ended up being alone, having no contact with his kids, having no friends, and living in a massive house with no one else. One day, he had a stroke, and no one called an ambulance because no one knew.

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What's round and orangey? An orange.

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Hey, i just met you. And this is crazy! But im on bathsalts ! *GAUH* Your face looks tasty!! :D

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whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

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So a seal walks into a club.

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Knock Knock! Come in.

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Why don't women have breasts? Because they have dandruff. Get it? Hint: "dandruff" = "dan druff"

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Why Is Six Afraid of Seven? because he is black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops