My grandpa asked me a very important question right before he kicked the bucket. Grandpa: Son, how far do you think I could kick this bucket?

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what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

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How many Jews can fit in a VW Beetle? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, and maybe one in the trunk, but that wouldn't be very comfortable.

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a bald man walks into a hairdressers and demands beans on toast.

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A horse walks into a bar, realizes that he shouldnt be here so he walks out.

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What did the man say to the other man? yummmmm

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These are some questions you should never ask on a first date: When you wipe do you throw your toilet tissue in the toilet or on a trash can? Do you smell your hands after you wipe? Do you you ever look down when you take a dump and see it come out? Have you ever picked your butt and then picked your nose with the same finger?

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An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

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What's the opposite of a joke? An Anti-Joke.

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What do you call a black woman that flys a plane? - a pilot...

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Why didn't Billy have legs? Because he's a fish.

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What is white black and Chinese A panda

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What's worse then 10 babies nailed to 10 trees? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

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whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

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Many people believe that dogs are mammals. They're right

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Q: What is long and hard? A: The gun used to kill my parents.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had herpes.

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I love pissing people off :P

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Whats worse than being a Jew? Being black.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone dropped a refrigerator on her. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? K

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Where did jimmy go when the bomb exploded.... (Everywhere )

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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