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What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

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i walked into a bar, the bar tender for some reason said get out. the bartender did not realise that i was the #1 criminal in america. but why would he, i was in cuba. ( i was seven at the time)

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Roses are red, They are also violet, yellow, white, pink, orange, purple, or orange.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? The chain broke.

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Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Why not? --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Yo momma so fat, when she sits on a rainbow nothing happens, as rainbows are merely rays of light refracted off of water particles in the air, apparent to humans only on a visible spectrum.

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this is an anti joke THIS IS NOT A JOKE O:

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cool story bro. tell it again. tell it at a party.

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What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

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What did batman say to robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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How do u say hi to a black person JUST SAY HI RACIST

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A man asked another man what he was doing the next day. The man then proceeded to tell him that he had not intended on having any plans due to the fact that he was planning on killing himself within the next twenty three hours.

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Why was the cancer ward sad? They just lost a patient who couldn't ward off cancer.

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In soviet Russia... there is a distinct probability that you will get mugged due to the high crime rate and gang ruled streets.

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Why did the heroin addict get staff infection? His skin broke open multiple times without proper cleansing.

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you: have you seen the movie constapated them:no you:its because it hasen't come out yet

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Q: Why could John say goodbye to his girlfriend ? A: He didnt have one

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What do you get when you cross a duck with a cat? You can't. The current state of genetic engineering will not allow avian DNA and mammalian DNA to be combined.

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what does a man with no leg say to a woman with one eye? hello. by Mad James

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

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Laura Pratz... not having a strong urge to tweet everything that happens in her life.

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Why can't so many guys get it up? Because erectile dysfunction affects 30 million men nationwide.

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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