-Hey, Larry! How much is one plus one? -Two

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Q: whats up? A: radiation levels in japan

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A man walks into a bar. What does he say? Ouch!

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Why didn't the restaurant serve the black man? He hadn't ordered anything.

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What did one cow say to the other cow? Moo

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What's the difference between an elephant and a moscito? There are several differencies. Firstly, the elephant is a mammal and the moscito is an insect.

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why did the monkey fall out the tree? he lost his grip

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

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Why did the door close? Because I closed it.

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Why did Susie fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Why did Susie drown? Because she fell in a puddle. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzy!

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how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

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what did the asian say to the other asian "where both asian"

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What's red and the size of a packet of crisps? A Miscarriage

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Just gonna stand there and watch me roar. But that's alright because I am a dinosaur.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at him.

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So I'm at the office and I tell this guy, "Hey can you pass me the stapler. But when you pass it over, make sure there are staples in it 'cause if not, I can't staple anything."

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A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

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What did hitler do with the vegetarians? Nothing, because he was one.

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You are the most beautiful person in the world.

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Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she didn't have any arms

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Q: How do u make a butcher cry A: Kill its family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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