"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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Michael Brown

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This is the funniest joke in the world: Just joking!

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whats the king of the forest, is the color brown and is red all over? A deer or someone's soon to be dinner.

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What ended in the year 1970? 1969

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What did the tiger say to the jellyfish? Nothing; tigers can't talk. And if they could the chances of a tiger meeting a jellyfish would be very slim.

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What is worse than a bunch of babies stapled to a tree? A bunch of trees stapled to a baby.

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There were three elephants in a bathtub. One said, "Pass me the soap." The other one said, "What do you think I am? A Radio???"

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If a tree falls on a woman and there's no one around to hear her scream why did a tree fall in the kitchen?

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Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

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What do you call a black police officer? The drug dealer's inside man.

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how do you make holy water? you burn the hell out of it

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how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

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What's wet and pink? Bubblegum!

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are you from hawaii? because your the only ten I see

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Q:Why did the booger cross the street? A:Because everyone was picking on him

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A guy walks into a bar and hears a someone crying. He asks the bartender who is crying and the bartender says "It's my goat. He's been crying since Tuesday, I'm giving a $500 reward to whoever can make him stop." So the man walks to the back and whispers something to the goat's ear and suddenly the goat starts laughing. The bartender was so amazed at what happened and says "Wow, thank you kind sir! Here's your reward money." and the man takes the money and leaves. The next day the man returns to the bar and the bartender says "Hey, ever since you made my goat laugh he hasn't stopped. He's been driving me nuts. I'll give you another $500 to make him stop." So again, the man goes to the back of the bar and whispers to the the goats ear. Suddenly, the goat start crying again. The bartender can't believe it. He asks "How in the world did you do that? What did you say to my goat?" The man says "Well the first time I saw your goat I told him a joke." "Okay, that explains why he kept laughing..." the bartender asks "Now, what did you say to make him cry?" The man replies "I told him..." Suddenly the goat escapes and goes completely crazy and kills everybody in the bar with his horns. Till this day no one knows what the man said to the goat.

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What did the kid in the wheelchair get for Christmas? AIDS.

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How many black teachers does it take to figure out 10 x 30. only one shes a very respected teacher

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what do fish smoke? sea weed

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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What's worse than a snake in your boot. A boot in your snake.

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I'm a poet and I just didn't realise

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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