if life gives you lemons...chuck them back and say i wanted muffins instead!!!!

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot. What are you, racist?

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What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

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What's worse than waking up next to an ugly girl? Waking up, sealed in a coffin which is floating on a raft traversing through shark-infested waters. Oh, and the raft is on fire.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my girlfriend? My girlfriend is alive and 19 years older.

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what did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur nothing dinosaurs can't talk

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What did the bear say to the mouse? Roar.

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A Haiku It Is This One Is Kind Of Boring Now It's Time For Bed

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You're mama's so ugly, she will most-likely never meet a compatible mate and die alone.

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What do you call a big hungry duck? A duck thats hungry and big

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Why couldn't Bruce drive a truck? Cause Bruce was a Fish.

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What smells like weed? the person who smoked it.

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If you took all the veins in your body and laid them end to end, you would die.

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what happend when the AntiJoke Crossed the road? It pooped in the ... HIT BY A REFRIGERATOR.

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there is a mexican and a black guy in the back of a car, who is driving? The cop

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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How do pigs get hurt? They are run over by a tractor.

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What is the difference between a brick and a ginger? The entirety of their chemical make up and physical appearance.

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Your mom is so ugly that she was mercilessly bullied throughout high school which led to severe depression and low self-esteem, however she went to college, got a career, found a man who loved her for who she is, not how she looks, and raised a family happily ever after.

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How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

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Q: Why did the Jew have to go to a concentration camp? A: Because he was Jewish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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