Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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what did the book say to the lamp? nothing because BOOKS CANT TALK

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An old man walks into a bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

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Whats the difference between a frog?

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What time is it? 10:58

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What did the say to the host of the pool party after he pooped? Mr. TImmons! There is chocolate in the pool!

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what did the guy who had unsafe sex get? A good time

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I see said the blind man, to his deaf wife, as the cripple ran by.

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What's the difference between a duck, an engineer, and a leaf? There are many differences between these 3 that I will not list them all.

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Q: What is tall, white, and shaped like a house? A: a tall white man, if you break his limbs and twist them into the rectangular shape of a house.

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What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

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How do you fit a whale into a truck bed? You can't, whales live in the ocean.

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How many turrets patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? Cocksucker!!

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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what is the differance between a toyata and a van full of dead babies I dont own a toyata

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What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is an Italian food that is an American favorite, and the other is a follower of Judaism.

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What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

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A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

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A lady walks into her bedroom and sees her boy friend having sex with another girl. She hears the phone ring and a voice says "your grandma died".

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Why doesn't Superman eat peanuts? He doesn't like them

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What's black and white and red all over? A nun in a blender.

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Why did the boy have no ankles? Because his legs were amputated

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops