Roses are black Violets are Black I'm Hellen Keller

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There are 2 Muffins in an oven in a bakery. The first muffin says "Is it hot in here , or is it just me?" The other muffin says " We are going to die in here and no one will here us screaming."

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The economy.

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How do you give Salley enough energy swim against the river current? Add your own electric current.

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Two Muffins are in a freezer. The first muffin says "Sure is cold in here." The other muffin sits there untill at a later date eaten because muffins can't talk. The first muffin later is analyzed and dysected by the United States governmant and is classified as alien because again, muffins can't talk.

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What did the homeless man give his friends for Christmas? More AIDS.

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roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

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Marrage s like a card game. You start off with 2 hearts and 1 diamond. You end up wishing for a club and a spade!

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What has four legs and one arm? An attack dog in a daycare.

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An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

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You are so average that, if you entered an average contest, you'd come in middle place.

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Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

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What's the difference between a mole and dynamite? - Moles don't explode... unless you fill them with dynamite.

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Q: Why didnt jim win the race ? A: Because he swalowed his tounge.

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What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

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Q: how do you catch a bear? A: you dig a hole, fill the hole with ashes, surround the hole with peas, and when the bear comes to take a pea kick him in the ash hole

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What do you do when life hands you lemons? Such a statement assumes that life is an actual person, which is impossible. Thus, you do not need to concern yourself with what you must do when life hands you lemons.

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Mitt Romney.

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what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

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What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

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What do you call a child that has been stabbed? A dead child

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Knock Knock. Who's there? grape. Grape who? Purple grape.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Pokerface.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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