- Anti Joke

a blond a her blond boyfriend were walking acrossed a river. she gose over the river but the ramp brecks when she's past. her boyfriend says wait until night and I'll get a flashlight and shine it acrossed get on the light beem and walk acrossed.she says no when I'm haf way acrossed you will turn the light off.

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

What do you call a gay man? Phil Krahn

what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

A father walks in on his kid masturbating to pictures of horses and promptly divorces his wife.

Knock knock! Who's there? It's me, Allison. Oh, come in!

There was an Irishman and an Australian who walked into a bar. There was also an American, who didn't. Why didn't the American walk into the bar? He was a midget.

What is black and hanging from the tree in my back yard? A tire Swing.

I remember my grandfather's last words he said to me before he kicked the bucket...."Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

I saw a shovel once.

If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

Oh you're dating my ex? Do you want my unfinished sandwhich too? And my old shoes? And a couple of my shirts I don't wear anymore? How about a my toys I used to play with? Or my spoiled pickle that's been in my car for about a year and a half after I went to the mall with my friends, we watched a movie, I don't remember which one it was but it was funny, then after that we went to McDonald's and it was the first time I heard of McGangbang and it was pretty good. After that I think we went to Jerry's cousin's house, he was a cool guy until I found out that he likes Tyga, so I ended up never talking to him again.... I went off topic, sorry

A boy owned a dog that was uncommonly shaggy. Many people remarked upon its considerable shagginess. When the boy learned that there are contests for shaggy dogs, he entered his dog. The dog won first prize for shagginess in both the local and the regional competitions. The boy entered the dog in ever-larger contests, until finally he entered it in the world championship for shaggy dogs. But the day before the championship the dog died.

Q: Why was the man upset? A: He was kidnapped. Two cruel men tied him to a chair in an unknown location. This man was mistaken for someone who was planning to steal a big drug shipment. They beat him unmerciful, shocked him, and hit him in the head with a hammer, and threw him out in the street, with the belief of his death occurring. A driver stopped to help the man into the nearby hospital. The man was questioned about the physical appearance and whereabouts of these criminals. He remembered nothing, and sadly, they got away with this horrible crime.

Men's rights

Q.What did the anti-joke reader say to the doctor? A-My finger is stuck on the dislike button.

How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

Q: What do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? A: An horse

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops