Dad: hi son Kid: (looks sad and looks at the ground) Dad: what's wrong son. Kid:I raped a girl. Dad:Who? Did you rape son! Kid:mom.

Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human.

Why did the police officer arrest the baseball player? He raped and murdered a thirteen year old girl.

Knock Knock JUST OPEN THE FLIPPIN DOOR ALREADY! I DON"T NEED YOU TO KNOCK AND INTRODUCE YOURSELF EVERY TIME YOU COME TO MY HOUSE!!! Jeez...seriously

A train poops its pants.

I read my Uncle an anti-joke. He is still wondering why it made no sense to him.

Q: How do you stop a skunk from smelling? A: Lethally inject it.

Me: Ask me if I'm an orange. You: Are you an orange? Me: No

Q.who is Tiny, a lion and has no friends and is a bald eagle? A.Rory Johnston

So two cannibals are eating a clown. Cannibal one: Does this taste funny to you? Cannibal two: Considering that this man was a clown he must have been in poverty so he resulted to being an alcoholic and maybe over dosed on over the counter drugs. Cannibal one: Thank you for that reasonable answer.

I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

Why was the Chinese man so sad? He's Asian.

Chuck Norris doesn't wait in traffic, he takes the subway

Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

A man walks into himself. He is revealed.

There once was a girl who took away my source of entertainment. Her name was Nicole.

How did the rock cross the road? It didn't cause it's a rock.

What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

How do you make a tissue dance? You really can't, but you could grab it and shake it around so it looks like its dancing.

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

Your momma's so fat that she went on a diet.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? He was hit by a bus

What do you call people who play dance dance revolution? Dancers

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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