what did the turnip say to the plum? nothing, as most fruits and vegetables would've said

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Hillo, its Spodermen, teiling u i fuked ur bich.

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man: so where did you two meet? man tied to flower: in the produce section.

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Knock knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? T get to the other side of the road

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a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

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Q: What comes after 8? A: 9

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The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

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how much is a microwave full of dead babies? a fridge full of dead puppies.

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Dont be mean Dyslexics are teople poo

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I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

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What happens when you touch a curling iron to your arm? You get burned.

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What do you call an asian pilot? A pilot you racist bastard

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what do you call a girl who sells sex for money? sally

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Sex positions (and other related things), never took off... 1. The 96 2. The mission (impossible) position. 3. The Tangoers party (swingers? The fack is that?) 4.Nasal. 5. Bed waltz (requires amazing dancing skills and multitasking, now they just call everything for "bed waltz" to show off) 6.Blind Date take uno (hard to find two blind people and make sure they meet each other and have a good time by themselves). 7. GILFS take one (I mean there could be many hot grandmas out there, but "Guns Id Like For Shooting", was not too popular due accidents)

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Why did the runner stop farting in the middle of his run? He ran out of gas.

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Cole is "good" at soccer

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A guy walks into a bar. Ouch

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So a mama tomato, a daddy tomato, and a baby tomato were all walking down the street. The baby tomato was falling behind its parents. So the daddy tomato goes back, squishes the baby tomato and yells ketchup!

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

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I'm pretty sure this site has been taken over by 12 year olds... None of these are funny

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A minor, her mom, her aunt and a marine went out drinking...they had a fun night

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cannibal. Cannibal wh... As the man opened the door, he was eaten. And they lived happily ever after. The end.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? *cause 7 8 9? NO cause 7 was a nigga!

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What did one muffin say to the other Muffin? Nothing, muffins have no method of communication in any way shape or form

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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