Friends are a lot like snow You pee on them, they disappear

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's brown and green, has six legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Wow, that was a long opinion for someone that does supposedly not watch Hentai, hey, if you like hentai thats cool, I was about your age when I got really tired of watching sex drawn or not and just you know, went for it real life as they say nowadays. I just happen to like your eyes, I mean you do not like them, but avoid mirrors and I will be the one looking at them. Chobits, yeah, I watched that a looong time ago, then deathnote, and then nothing because I got too old for that stuff, Oh wait, gungrave, that I also watched.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A Jew with a boner runs into a wall, what hits first? His nose

thumb_up thumb_down -7

i got angry and i was like " i really want to kick someone" ,my friend was on the ground and shes like "you can kick me" ,and i'm like "REALLY" ,then i kicked her really hard and she cried...

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do you do to get someone to shut up? You hit with a brick

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what do you call a kid with no arms and legs under a bus an ambulance, he's obviously in pain

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How do you get babys to paint a house? depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why are objects in your mirror closer than they appear? Because they are closer than they appear.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Two Muffins are in a freezer. The first muffin says "Sure is cold in here." The other muffin sits there untill at a later date eaten because muffins can't talk. The first muffin later is analyzed and dysected by the United States governmant and is classified as alien because again, muffins can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do u save someone from dieing of cancer? U shoot them in the head

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Whats sad about a black man killing himself? That shaft DVD that he rented will probably be late now.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Justin Bieber had sex with a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a shiny new Cadillac? I don't have a shiny new Cadillac in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

If 3 days ago was yesterday and today is Friday, how many legs does 7 dogs, 3 ducks, and 2 chickens have if the answer was red? Okay, not to sound rude but I'm gonna take a wild guess and say.....yo mama is so fat when she read this joke she ate the whole bucket of popcorn and didn't even share.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

roses are red violets are blue my cat died and i have alsheimers who are you

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q. Why was the dad sad? A.His favorite team lost in the championship.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Bro my d*ck is like 20 inches. That's not healthy, an erection that big will deprive your brain of too much blood and kill you

thumb_up thumb_down +4

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL O LO LO L OL O LO L OL O LO LO L OL OL O LO LO L OL OL OL O LO L OL OL O L OL OLLOLOLLOL OL O LO LO L OL OL O

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the man cross the road? He was obviously trying to get to his work, however he realized he was jaywalking in front of a cop and had to pay a fine and ended up being late to work.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did Michael Vick run? Because he was being chased by defenders.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops