A man walks into a music store and hears dubstep playing in the background and he says, "Ugh! I hate dubstep!" Suddenly the clerk gets extremely offended and says, "Haters gonna be gay!" The man chuckles at the clerk's remark and shakes his head. "No no no silly," He said. "Haters gonna not be deaf." He says shaking his head as he walks out. The clerk tries to elaborate on what the man meant, but he realizes he cannot hear his thoughts.

why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

Why was Junior sad? His parents were killed in a car crash.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure and drugs.

An elderly lady walks into a grocery store, and nothing of a great significance happens.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by Shrek

A horse walked into a barn...

Why did the black man run from the officer? The officer was trying to perform non-voluntary sexual acts against him.

What did the Johhny say to the black man when he saw him buying a watermelon? Nothing, Johnny is mute.

Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

ok, so a blue flower in a meadow dances valiantly, while being watched by a chipmunk. the king of the sky fairies ate an apple and a chicken and a pear, and a cumkwuat and frog legs and a bone and a library and a jeep and fig and a rhino and a sword but fairies don't have that big of mouths to eat all of that, so this never happened

Why didn't the blond cry at her child's funeral? She died, too. It was a terrible accident.

Have you ever seen a dinosaur? No

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Latvian guy said to the other latvian guy: ''Why did the chicken cross the road?'' The other latvian guy responded: ''In truth, i do not know. I have not seen chicken in 10 years. The last time was before the red army plundered my village. I can still hear all the screams from the women being raped. But, back to question. Where is this chicken you speak of? I have not eaten in days and my wife and children are close to starvation aswell''

How do you kill a blonde? Irreversibly damage her vital organs to the point where she loses consciousness and will never wake again.

What is worse then having no dad? Russian dad that hates you a lot and wishes you drawn in vodka.

Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

Why did Sally fall of the swing? Breaking news! An 18 wheeler has gone loose and hit a playground damaging a swing, 1 fatality and 16 children injured 5 in critical condition

what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

Q: How many different Pokèmon are there? A: Pokèmon aren't real.

Q: What do you call a black person with one leg? A: In modern American society, it is proper etiquette to adress somebody by their first name.

How do you blindfold and Asian? By using a sturdy bandanna, cloth, any other object to avert ones view.

Justin Bieber.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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