Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Cheese in toast,

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what did the boy who liked trucks get for his birthday? POOP

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why was the little boy screaming. he realized he was an asian

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They beat her mercilessly.

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Ashton Kutcher meets a fine cougar at a bar and the cougar fatally wounded his throat.

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What's black and sits at the top of the stair case? Stephen hawking in a house fire.......

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What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

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Why does Garrett have a small penis? He is not old enough to buy extenze.

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How do you tell the difference between Lila and derrek ashmore? Oh wait they both have vaginas

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How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

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What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

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A Higgs Boson walks into a church. The priest says “We don’t allow Higgs Bosons in here.” The Higgs Boson replied, “Well, without me, you can’t have mass.”

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Why do white people drive big trucks? 'Cause they can afford it.

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How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

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What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

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a young boy once lost his mind and then his parents weeped because their son had been decapatated in a horrible motorcycle accident caused by a drunk who had just killed his wife and children and was running from the cops....

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Destiny was calling me, so I picked up the phone.

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Yo mama is so fat because she doesn't exercise and eats way too much calories. The reason fat people gain weight is because of low metabolism which means her body is not burning a lot of fat and instead is storing fat. A healthy life style such as playing sports, walking in a park, or eating healthy foods will benefit her from any medical complications in the future.

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What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Well you can't drive planes

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Q: Why did the cat roll down the hill? A: It had no legs

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

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Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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