I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

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*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

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Friends are like lettuce; If you eat their head, they die

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there once was a man named china who got stuck in yo mamas vagina he escaped through her butthole minus her butt mole and then died a horrible and painful death

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knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

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What's better than r a p e? Consensual sex.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Ebola

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Two muffins are in an oven. It was a really small batch.

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Rebecca Black and Justin Bieber get married.... Friends and family attend the wedding

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A horrible boating accident.

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A Jewish person was found dead in an alley way last night, Hitler did nothing wrong.

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People eat. Thats because we poop. No its the other way around. Sloppy Joes. Thats what my poop looks like. Oh no im eating poop in between two buns!

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

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What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

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A man asks his wife to make him a sandwich, she proceeds to make a sandwich using rye bread, lettuce, two slices of tomatoes, a variety condiments, mustard and several slices of American cheese. The man eats the sandwich at a parade with his wife celebrating Woman's Rights.

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A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

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A pig walks into a bar and says, "Oink."

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What's the best Medieval job? A Jester because you get to play with balls all day.

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What is 10 inches long and didnt get sucked on valentines day? Whitney Houston's crack pipe.

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whats worse than vegetables? Fisting Grandmas

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Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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