Why did Patrick cross the road Because he saw a rock

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

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What did the orphan get for christmas........Cancer

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What do you call a green land with wheels? Grass lied about the wheels.

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3 Jews walk into a bar. Few minutes later a penny is dropped. This resenct occation causes a bar fight to brake out.

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Q: If a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it still make a sound? A: Yes

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How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

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what did the man say to his horse? sex. -teagan doherty

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What did Helen Keller say to Michael Jordon before she died? Nothing...

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How many Jews did Hitler kill during the Holocaust? Too many.

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Out on the playground of a school, extremely young kids are acting as living witness to an audacious thing. They're watching a very interesting display of strength and brutality. They're observing a enactment of lofty potential and great might. What're they watching? They're regarding their principal getting promptly arrested by the federal police for possession of technically illegal weaponry including, but not only limited to what looked like to them: peculiar "fire crackers" and reloadable "candy dispensers". In the ensuing battle, their principal got shot in the arm and a random pedestrian got killed by a stray bullet. In the end, the cruel joke's on them. Guess what? They're irrepairably damaged for the rest of their life.

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Ask me if I'm in a tree? No.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6 million, 1 to screw it in, and 5,999,999 to die in the holocaust.

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Why did the black woman have an affair? Because she had an unsatisfying sex life, her old husband was boring, and she was curious about being with other men.

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Q: What is creepy and stares at you when you sleep A: Me

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Why does it take women to cum slower than men? Who cares

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Q.What's green and smells like grass??? A. Grass

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why did u put your iphone in the blender?!?!? because i wanted to make apple juice..

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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what did the man do when he fell off the top of a building? Nothing He DIED!!!!!!

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what is similar between a turtle losing its shell, and a man selling his chlothes and house? they are now both naked and homeless

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Billy. Billy who? Billy your next door neighbor, I need to borrow some sugar. Ok, come in.

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what is the diference between a jew and a boy scout. a boy scout comes home from camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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