Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravity

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How much cabbage is in sean's teeth? lots, like it's rotting in there

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Donald Trump decided to run for President.

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What did the blind, def , dumb kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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A man walks inti a bar and asks for a drink, he shows the bartender his ID and is kicked out because the man is underaged.

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A woman was in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband. Shortly after she brings the sandwich to him and he thanks her seeing as his disabled legs prevent him from walking to the kitchen and making one himself. His wife later heads to her job as a firefighter.

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Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. 9/11 who? Oh my god, I thought you said you'd never forget.

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What did the fridge say to the watermelon? Nothing.

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Chuck Norris was walking down the street when he was confronted by an armed, very desperate street robber. Chuck unfortunately made the decision to defend himself, and was shot in the gut before he could complete a roundhouse kick. The robber then took his wallet and ran off, undoubtedly to buy drugs.

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There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

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I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

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How are JFK and Jimmy Neutron similar? They both had brain blasts.

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What's yellow, black, and makes you laugh? A bus full of black people going off a cliff.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

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What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and my cousins? Nothing.

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A black man and a white man were on an island. They lived in England.

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Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

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knock. knock. whos there? ur mom now put ur pants back on

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What is white and is sometimes drunk? Milk.

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*knock knock* "Who's there?" "It's the police, I'm afraid your husband was in a car crash and died."

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Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena

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How does santa deliver presents? He doesn't, because he's not real!

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Yo mammas so fat she wears big clothes!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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