A Starfish walks into a bar. He sits down next to a man with a concussion. Q: What did the man say? A: Nothing because he was in a concussion and was no longer able to say words.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock knock! Who's there? A bottle of beer. No thanks, I've been sober for 15 years.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Yo mamas so stupid that she received slightly below average in her latest maths test

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the teenage girl pee on a stick? She and her boyfriend had foolishly engaged in unprotected sex two weeks before, and she was now concerned that she may be pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

test

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a medical student who finishes last in his class? Doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? None, cus feminists can't change shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. They discuss their differences over a pint of beer and leave with a greater understanding of each other's faiths.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What do you call a Mexican with a Green Card? A hard working American Citizen

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -17

whats worse than having your sextape leaked to the media? not being a kardashian when it happens.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A businessman walks out of a store with his new haircut he was bald.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

whats worse that being raped by a giant squirrel? being raped by two giant squirrels.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Have you ever seen the episode of the powerpuff girls where they save the day?

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. They both died at the same time in a horrible shipwreck. There were no survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down +212

What do you call a baby with no future? A baby dying at birth.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Paul howley can't drive, phahahaha

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

-What did the duck say to Federico Costa nearby the phonebox in a rainy day? -Quack

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Chuck Norris will die sometime in the future.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

whats the same about a turtle and another turtle? they both seem to like lettuce

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops