Why was the man sad? His intestines were imploding and his head was shot off seventeen seconds ago.

why are the inside of a black mans hand white? cotton residue

what do you call a man with cheese on his face? cheese face

What's brown and sticky? Feces.

What do you call a bitchy unreliable friend? You don't call that bitch at all.

What do you call the branch of Science that separates the organism's race? RACISM

why did hannibal lector butter up the teacher? he wanted to get a good grade. he also wanted to eat her

How does a cow does a cow do an evil laugh?

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

"Ask me if I'm a tree," "Are you a tree?" "No."

your mama so dumb her iq point is below average

What kind of fire alarm does a zebra not like? One that doesn't work

Yo momma so thin, she admitted herself into an in-patient counseling center for anorexic and bulimic patients.

What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

Why did the man drink the milk? Because he was a baby.

what did the dirty homeless girl get for Christmas -A DILDO

i used to think i had the coolest secret handshake with helen keller. then i realized she was talking sh*t about me

How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two.

The husbant is back from work. He opens the door of closet and finds... Narnia.

There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

Q. There were 2 Mexicans in a car, who was driving it? A. The police officer.

A white guy, a mexican, and a black guy are in a race. Who always wins? Whichever one crosses the finish line first

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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