What do you call a pig sizzling in a pan? BACON!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead..

What happened to the boy who wanted to jump off a cliff? He jumped off a cliff.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

A black man, a Mexican, and a Jew walk into a bar. The white bartender kills them all because he was a huge racist.

knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

How long does it take to acheive a superbowl win? However long it takes you.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game...

If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

your so vein that doctors find you really helpful when giving you injections

A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

Roses are gay Violets are gayer when you hear girls moaning im the player

what is black white and red all over? A black and white movie with the first violent color leave a comment if this joke is duped.

I took my mum for a big shop the other day, we used the parent and child spot, not like there's an age range on it. - Peter Kay Try parking in the furthest spot away from the shop and you might burn some calories. -Me

Knock knock Who's there? The chicken that crossed the road

Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No...........

Roses are red Violets are blue Daisies are yellow Trust me, I'm a florist.

What's the difference between Tom and Jerry? One is a cat, and the other is a mouse.

why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock! who's there? not suzy.

mike:what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas tom:cancer ahahahaha mike:he got a skateboard jerk nararrator: this skate board will be worth less because he has no legs

how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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