How do you blindfold an Asian person? With a blindfold

Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

'Dyslexic man walks into a bar... and orders a pint

How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue shotgun How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose and shoot it with a blue shotgun.

The Olympics

How did Suzy die She choked on a Pick-Up Truck

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

What's funnier than 24? 25

banana

Knock knock Who's there? No Who is over there

whats worse that finding your having sex with your long lost sister? having sex with your long lost brother

Me-Whats long and hard and full of seaman Him-a submarine Me-No dumb ass a dick

A man walks into a bar. He's black. Its 1962. He is immediately arrested.

Why could susan not get up? Because her limbs were hacked off by a African militia group.

Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Not the case here, though.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks why the long face? The horse, unable to comprehend human speech, promptly craps on the floor and leaves.

It got hit by a rocket.

What do you call a man who just died 5 minutes ago? Dead.

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

A man walks into a bar, he then falls unconscious and driven safely to the hospital.

Where's my shotgun

What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

666 im christian

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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