A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

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Want to hear a joke? Jokes are not allowed on this site. Only anti-jokes.

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Q: What did the priest say to the rabbi? A: Our God is a wonderful, loving god; praise his name.

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Roses are red.........I slept with someone else

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A frog in a blender

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Why did Jennifer shit herself? Because there was a black man staring through her window!

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i had a bowl of soup and it was 5 inches in diameter and 3 inches tall. how much soup did i eat? very little because i drank most of it

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Yo mommas so fat We are terribly concerned about her health

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it tastes good.

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Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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A woman gets in her car to drive.

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why did the roof cave in? It was not structurally sound do to poor architecture

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Me Chinese Me no joke Me die of cancer.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. WHAT?! You are about to die and be eaten.

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Why did the bald man go to hospital? Because we was getting chemotherapy

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A baby seal walks in to a club

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Whats the difference between two flies? Nothing, they're both flies.

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves the bar slightly intoxicated.

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John has 32 candy bars, he eats 28..what does he have now? Diabetes.

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Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

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Where's my baby??

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??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????1?2?3?4?5?6?7?8?9?0?????????#????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????©®™?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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