What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

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A young baby died.

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What do you call a man who's arms have been amputated? It doesn't matter, he won't be able to pick up the phone.

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Knock knock! Whos there? Me. Now open the door.

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A child in Africa developed Malaria. He became very sick and died.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

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Why didn't the cat eat its dinner? Because I nailed its head to the floor.

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why did sally fall off the swing cause she had no arms knock knock who's there? not sally

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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How do you get a priest out of a tree? Throw a canoe at him.

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Yeah, I assumed so, but I got kinda worried at the same time. Huh... The catchthing says trolololol, no coincidence at all huh? Anyway, take that last comment Nero, I am spent.

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cancer

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Your mom is so fat, she has sleep apnea.

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What's the opposite of Christopher Walkins? Christopher Reeves.

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What's a foot long and slippery A dick

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You know that feeling you get when you see your crush walking towards you? No, I'm blind.

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why did the kid cross the road he didnt he had no legs

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Eric went for a poo in the public toilets. After he finished, he realised that there was no toilet roll. So he had to just pull up his pants and put up with his sshitty arse for the rest of the day. Unfortunately, he was in a board meeting and when he went in he stank of shit and it was a very uncomfortable feeling.

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"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

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Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

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How do you fit four gay men on a bar stool? You build an exceptionally large bar stool

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25

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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