Q: What did one candle say to the other? A: Nothing, the mere thought of candles being able to possess the ability of speech is preposterous beyond any of the highest capabilities known to man.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can probably lift more than 80 pounds

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How many bodies can you stuff into a oven? Who tries figure that out? I'm calling the cops.

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whats red and green and has 8 wheels. a stick

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What's worse than the holocost? 6 Million Jews

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Doctor, doctor, it hurts when I hit my head with a hammer!! Dont hit your head with a hammer anymore.

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A dog walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender goes to get him a drink, but then realizes how ridiculous this is and wakes up from his dream. He rolls over to tell his wife about it, but she ignores him. He begins to cry silently, realizing his marriage is in shambles.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy

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how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

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Why did the boy drowned Bc he couldn't swim

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Whats brown and drives people around? A cab driver of south asian decent. Finding a job that alligns with their qualifications and experience is not always possible, so they take up menial jobs to survive and provide for their family.

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an object in motion continues to stay in motion unless acted upon by an external force :)

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A hero is nice to everyone, but one person. who is that? Your mom. WOOOOOOOT!! YOU JUST GOT MUSCLEMANED!!!!

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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Why is it OK to make fun of a deaf person? Because they can't hear.

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Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

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what colour is a frog green you idiot

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A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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What do you get if you throw a banana at the wall? Nothing.

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Did you hear about the monkey in the tree? Oh no wait. It was a lizard.

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What's the difference between a black businessman and a white businessman? Their skin colour.

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How did the car get a dent? Terrorists bombed the house next to it

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an asian walks into a bar and does his math homework then he gets raped by a horse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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