Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she get up? She had no legs. *Knock knock* Who's there? Not Suzie.

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How do you stop a black man from drowning Get your foot off of his head

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What's faster than a Mexican running away with your T.V.? An Airplane

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: Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

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What's the first thing that goes through a persons mind when they get shot in the head. The bullet.

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The dog, Marley from Marley and Me. It died.

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Yo' mama so stupid, she has a lower IQ than the average person.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

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1. A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''

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there once was a teacher who wouldnt shut up she just rambled and rambled and rambled ,untill one day i brang a gun to school and shot her ,she doesnt rambled anymore and i dont go to school anymore =win for everyone

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Nah, could not care less about how I sound on "The network", its just that I spent all night finishing the core concept to my new novel, and all the capital letters and stuff sound like Jim Carrey in my head as I type. So Redcunt, where you going? When you coming back?

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What did the soldier say when he got shot in the face? Nothing, he died.

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Why did the duck walk on the moon? Because it was his lifelong goal

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? One is a devotee of the torah, one is a delicious meal.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? A n a l

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What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

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What did the cat say to the human? Nothing

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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Fuck yourself you piece of shit.

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I had my period 3 days ago.

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Knock knock Who's There? (It was a ding dong ditch. Or a knock knock ditch. What ever.)

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Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 was osama bin laden

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A genie came out of a lamp explain?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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