What's the difference between mustangs and dead babies I don't collect mustangs

How do you confuse a blonde? You ask her a question.

what would you do if Michael Jackson was drowning? he can't drown he's already dead

That was SOOOOO funny that I laughed!!!!!

What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

A man walks into a bar and asks "Where is your bathroom?" He is directed towards the restroom, where he then covers himself in toilet paper and calls himself a moose.

An Asian child flunks a test.

Ask me if I'm a flower. Are you a flower? No.

What never seems to get old? AIDS.

Friends are like snow: If you piss on them, they disappear.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

A horse walks into a bar, it gets a concussion. -mattobrado

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Q: What's funny about prostitution? A: Nothing. It's a widely misunderstood profession.

What's worse than death? Nothing.

what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

How do you kill a 1000 Ethiopians? Throw a biscuit off a cliff. JimBoto

Where does a homeless person live? No where

Why did the chicken kill itself? To get to the other side.

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

I enjoy the fact that the jokes I post that do not make me laugh, are the ones that get zero thumbs, while those that at least make me smile, get at least a couple, I admit thought that its hard to keep track with me, I type jokes so fast that they disappear in the back before people can thumb them... Have you heard... Of the dog that was barking up the wrong three? The three said: Damn dog! I am not a tree! The dog kept barking, as dogs do not speak. Moral: Numbers speak fluently in most languages though...

Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

Why didn't Joe have any friends? Because according to Thomas Hobbes man is anti-social by nature and therefore the only friends that he has are purely to reach his own ends and thus Joe cannot truly have friends in the sense that many use the word.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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