What's worse than the Broncos losing the Superbowl? Your iPhone not working anymore

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A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

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What do you get when you sunflower? Vegan turtles.

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What do you call a blonde on the Moon? That depends on what her name is.

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Did you hear about the speed reader on top of the Twin towers? 90 stories 5 seconds.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I am an orphan I have no parents

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What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

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What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

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Izzy and Zayn Malick got married. Then Zayn asked for a divorce due to their age difference..

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? The person knocking at your door.

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Your mom's so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and foods with nutritional value!!!! Oh burn!!!!

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Rosa Parks is going to be here if she gets to the bus on time!

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How many Polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? My dad is dead.

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Why was the black man eating a banana? Because bananas are an excellent source of potassium.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

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Yo mama is so fat!

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

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ARE YOU READY FOR THE OLDEST ANTIJOKE EVER WRITTEN: HERE IT COMES....... THE MOST ANCIENT OF THEM ALL...... ARE YOU READY?????? HERE WE GO...... Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS IN FACT AN ANTI JOKE - "...ends with such an anti climax...the lack of punchline is the punchline."

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Q: What do you call a guy that likes men? A: Gay.

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Me:I talk to myself to much. Me:Same

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69

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Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops