Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

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Like CHUCK NORRIS, CHUCK NORRIS like You !

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Why did Billy fall off the swings? Because he had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy.

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How do you become thinner in a week? Stand in front of a Bulldozer.

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Where does a homeless person live? No where

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It’s dead.

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How do you kill a baby quickly? The better question is why kill a baby quickly?

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Why did the chicken kill itself? To get to the other side.

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This is a racist joke but who cares!? What is the difference between a black guy and a bag of shit? The bag I apologize to all my fellow black friends. -Lets go MEts

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? No.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

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What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

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what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

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Three men sit at a bar. A clown walks in, so the first man says, "Oh, what fresh hell is this?", gets up and leaves. Then a fairy flies in, so the second man says, "Aw, hell no!", gets up and leaves. So the third man was alone with the fairy and clown.

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I am darkness, soon I shall rule the world, those of you that desire to serve me thumb this up, those of you that desire eternal fear beyond your imagination, thumb me down. Moral: Try thinking of me and thinking "he is crazy", in order to unlock the secrets behind spontaneous human combustion.

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what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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hey

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Shoes, socks, and mittens.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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