Hello penis

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your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

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agp

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

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Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

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ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

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Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

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My mumma your mumma live down the street 18,19 marble street out came you and out came me but then your mumma died from her pee

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What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

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What did the old lady say when she went to a restaurant? OH look at the price of this salad.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

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What's brown, liquid and bad for your health in large doses? Did you guess: Coca Cola? Soda? Beer? Pepsi? Wrong. It's beer. Did this Anti-joke sound pretentious? Don't worry, you're not the only one.

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What do you call a white person on a leash? A toddler.

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What did the Muffin say to the other muffin ? I dont know

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In Soviet Russia, You drive the car, fill it up with gas and park it Just like in America

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What's white and hides behind a tree? Shy milk.

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Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

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What did the black man say to the man from Kyrgyzstan? I've never heard of your country before.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your mum. Oh hi mum, the doors unlocked

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

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national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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