How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

Q: What's Lindsay Lohan getting for Christmas? A: AIDS

What did the gay man say to the other gay man? Hey, we're both gay, let's have sex!

How do you make an eggroll? You push it.

Knock knock Who's There? Idk, who the **** names their kid There?

What did the widow get for mothers day A miscarriage

why was the man a redneck? because he got sunburned at the nascar race.

A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

What did the black man say to the man from Kyrgyzstan? I've never heard of your country before.

My doctor recommended I take anger management classes. That really pisses me off.

A man walks into a 1980's style restaurant he takes a seat and orders his meal.

What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, this joke sucks.

Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

Q.Want to hear somthing that will never happen A. Sure A. the Houston Astros won a game.

A black walks into a Kentucky Fried Chicken. He was a customer.

national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

Get me a sandwich, bitch

A man walks into a bar, has a few drinks and spots a nice looking lady He then follows her home and molestes her child.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...