Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

In Soviet Russia, You drive the car, fill it up with gas and park it Just like in America

Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

Those days where everything goes wrong, and you think to yourself "I just gotta do whats right here"... ...Sigh... 2. DO YOU KNOW WHY I HATE YOU SO MUCH? BECAUSE I HATE YOU! (Blame is on me, love and hate are not opposites, send me a copy of your book, and ill rip it out for you)

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

What's white and sticky? Glue.

national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

A man walks into a bar, has a few drinks and spots a nice looking lady He then follows her home and molestes her child.

Why did the man start crying? Because he lost his job.

Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

What do you call a white person on a leash? A toddler.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

Hello penis

What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

What did the little orphan boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he had died six months prior to Christmas due to the horrible living conditions of the orphanage.

What did the black man say to the man from Kyrgyzstan? I've never heard of your country before.

If file gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

A black walks into a Kentucky Fried Chicken. He was a customer.

I've got a joke for you. The people writing these jokes. Thats a joke.

Last Christmas I gave you my heart... but the very next day your body rejected the transplant and you died.

whats white and cant climb a fence? a fridge

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock-knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

ive got a joke for you Nicki minajs ase

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...