Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

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Yo mama so stupid she tried to drown a dog and was quite successful at it. Know she serves a death sentence.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? If so, you're probably a pervert.

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In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

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A cruise ship took sail. It was about a mile out into the water already. The blonde had missed the ship when it set sail. She was only capable of swimming a mile. She swam a half a mile out after the ship, and then turned around. She then later died due to a severe case of hypothermia due to the temperatures of the water for long periods of time.

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Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What kind of society have we created that a chicken can't even cross a road without his motives being questioned?

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Yo mama is so hairy, because she's arab.

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves when he realizes he is supposed to be at a business meeting

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Why did the girl suck the other guy off? to get paid

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Why did the man start crying? Because he lost his job.

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I saw a man one day i saw him the next day and the next and the next i didn't see him ever again

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why did the black guy win a gold medal in the olympics? hard work, dedication and determanation! what no one else can be bothered to do anymore because of all this new technology and stuff!! get of your arse and do something active. NOW!

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What did the Muffin say to the other muffin ? I dont know

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what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

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In Soviet Russia, You drive the car, fill it up with gas and park it Just like in America

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What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

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national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

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What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

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LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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