A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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What's tastier than a dead baby? An orphaned dead baby.

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whats worse that 3 black guys dieing in a train accident .... one was ur brother the other was gay

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What do you get when you sunflower? Vegan turtles.

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if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

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lol

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Why did the goblin have no friends? because no one likes a goblin, including other goblins.

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what do you call a disabled black man getting beat up? an unfortunate human

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Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

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what do you call a man in a hole Fill

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Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

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Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind.

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Two men and a woman walk into a bar. They are all viciously murdered by a serial killer, who as he walks out, runs into a pole and suffers from a concussion, which he later dies from.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Roses are red Violets are blue (not really) I have Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

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Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

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What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? It's a spicy sort of stew, you'd enjoy it.

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what do you call a man that looks like will ferrel? jim

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What do you get when you combine KIA and NOKIA? A cheap vehicle with a cheap mobile phone inside.

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What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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