I saw a man one day i saw him the next day and the next and the next i didn't see him ever again

So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

Why did the chicken cross the road? What kind of society have we created that a chicken can't even cross a road without his motives being questioned?

What do you call a white person on a leash? A toddler.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

Yo mommas so fat they had to change 'one size fits all' to 'one size fits most'

ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

What does a tree and a human have in common? They both fall if you chop them with an axe.

Why does my ass hurt I played gmod with a blackpeople

What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

lol

Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

Why did the Dr love drop hit guitar? Because a bear walked into a bar and killed everyone in there including dr love and was then shot to death by police and animal control.

What's worse than getting a jigsaw puzzle for your birthday? Slavery

Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

Who let the dogs out? The pet shop.

What did the Muffin say to the other muffin ? I dont know

What do all of these jokes have in common? They're not funny. You see, the definition of an anti-joke is a "type of indirect humor that involves the joke-teller delivering something which is deliberately not funny, or lacking in intrinsic meaning. The audience is expecting something humorous, and when this does not happen, the irony itself is of comedic value." As this is a page full of anti-jokes, we know to expect the unfunny - thus robbing us of the experience of an anti-joke.

Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

This is my firstever post so I wanted to make it very specialand have it really mean something, then I though fark that for a joke

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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