How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? Hey, we're both gay, let's have sex!

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he can't fly

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What do you call a black guy in college? A student.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

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how do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? throw a mars bar off a cliff!

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Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? No.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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What's worse than getting kicked by a horse? Drowning.

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Grandma walked into the kitchen...

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What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass

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What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind.

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Q. What language cant you speak A.Sign language

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A man walks into a bar. - - - - - - - - -

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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9/11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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