Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

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How do you make an eggroll? You push it.

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Why did the Dr love drop hit guitar? Because a bear walked into a bar and killed everyone in there including dr love and was then shot to death by police and animal control.

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A cruise ship took sail. It was about a mile out into the water already. The blonde had missed the ship when it set sail. She was only capable of swimming a mile. She swam a half a mile out after the ship, and then turned around. She then later died due to a severe case of hypothermia due to the temperatures of the water for long periods of time.

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What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like pancakes Ouch! That hurt!

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A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

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9/11

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Barack Obama.

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Yo mama so stupid she tried to drown a dog and was quite successful at it. Know she serves a death sentence.

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Want to hear the best joke ever? Me too.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? Hey, we're both gay, let's have sex!

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

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No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

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In Soviet Russia, You drive the car, fill it up with gas and park it Just like in America

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How did the black man get out of the bathroom? He opened the door.

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What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

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national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

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Yo mamma so fat, she probably has Type Two Diabetes - which is often associated with obesity - and should seek medical advice.

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You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

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What does a tree and a human have in common? They both fall if you chop them with an axe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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