knock knock whos there not me

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What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

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Im ashamed of being from Canada

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

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What's green and fuzzy and would hurt a lot if it fell out of a tree and hit you? A pool table

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

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Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Ever hear the joke about the black guy going to jail its not a joke.

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What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

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ON THE SEVENTH DAY OF JUNE, THURSDAY HAPPENED!!!! -ilikecrepes97

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What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

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Tell somebody that someone told you they look like an owl. When they say "Who?" laugh in their face

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Miss Polly had a Dolly who was sick sick sick So she called for the Doctor to come quick quick quick The doctor came with his bag and his hat And he knocked on the door with a rat-tat-tat. He looked at Polly's Dolly and he shook his head. He said she had leprosy and must have all her limbs amputated.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers ravaged her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

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What did the black man say to the man from Kyrgyzstan? I've never heard of your country before.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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