Why did the chicken cross the road? I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers ravaged her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

What did the black man say to the man from Kyrgyzstan? I've never heard of your country before.

What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

Knock knock Who's There? Idk, who the **** names their kid There?

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing because polar bears lived in the northern hemisphere and penguins lived in the southern. But if one is smuggled from north to south or vice-versa. The polar would growl and consume the penguin.

Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

What do all of these jokes have in common? They're not funny. You see, the definition of an anti-joke is a "type of indirect humor that involves the joke-teller delivering something which is deliberately not funny, or lacking in intrinsic meaning. The audience is expecting something humorous, and when this does not happen, the irony itself is of comedic value." As this is a page full of anti-jokes, we know to expect the unfunny - thus robbing us of the experience of an anti-joke.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

What is worse than the Holocaust? a Michael Bay movie

A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

What's white and sticky? Glue.

What did the old lady say when she went to a restaurant? OH look at the price of this salad.

Who let the dogs out? The pet shop.

Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

Suzie has no arms and no legs and is on a swing. what happened? she fell and died knock knock whos there? not suzie.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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