Hello penis

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

thumb_up thumb_down -115

When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down -139

What did the catholic priest say to the little boy? Nothing sexual, that kind of behavior isn't as widespread as people think.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rihno? Rihno-elephant

thumb_up thumb_down +58

got a new boxing bag the other day its hanging from the top of my stairs its called dead seb

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the girl suck the other guy off? to get paid

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I am darkness, soon I shall rule the world, those of you that desire to serve me thumb this up, those of you that desire eternal fear beyond your imagination, thumb me down. Moral: Try thinking of me and thinking "he is crazy", in order to unlock the secrets behind spontaneous human combustion.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? He had heard from a mutual friend that his ex-girlfriend, who he had recently broken up with, would be present at the same party and to avoid an awkward encounter he chose not to go.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you confuse a blonde? You ask her a question.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

thumb_up thumb_down -62

ON THE SEVENTH DAY OF JUNE, THURSDAY HAPPENED!!!! -ilikecrepes97

thumb_up thumb_down +193

What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Where does a homeless person live? No where

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually 6 wasn't afraid of 7 because numbers have are not living things, therefore have no consciousness or emotions, meaning that numerical digits can not have a fear or be afraid of another number.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops