Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down

Yo mommas so fat they had to change 'one size fits all' to 'one size fits most'

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why does my ass hurt I played gmod with a blackpeople

thumb_up thumb_down -36

9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -66

ON THE SEVENTH DAY OF JUNE, THURSDAY HAPPENED!!!! -ilikecrepes97

thumb_up thumb_down +179

In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

got a new boxing bag the other day its hanging from the top of my stairs its called dead seb

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Q: What's Lindsay Lohan getting for Christmas? A: AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two men and a woman walk into a bar. They are all viciously murdered by a serial killer, who as he walks out, runs into a pole and suffers from a concussion, which he later dies from.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did the duck say to the hawk? quack

thumb_up thumb_down -5

You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the Kek Kick Ben? Cause Ben kicked Kek's Kik. KEKEKEK

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why was the man a redneck? because he got sunburned at the nascar race.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Grandma walked into the kitchen...

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Q.Want to hear somthing that will never happen A. Sure A. the Houston Astros won a game.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops