How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

ALL OF YOU NO MORE CURSING EVEN THOUGH ITS NOT POSSABLE SO DON'T LISTEN

thumb_up thumb_down -71

Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

thumb_up thumb_down +96

A black guy and a white guy walk into a bar, they were both unemployed and blowing their savings on their alcohol addictions

thumb_up thumb_down +94

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing because polar bears lived in the northern hemisphere and penguins lived in the southern. But if one is smuggled from north to south or vice-versa. The polar would growl and consume the penguin.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man opens his refrigerator and takes out a can of soda. He returns back to his living area and continues watching television.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats white and cant climb a fence? a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what did the muffin say to the other muffin when they were in the oven? hi, im a muffin

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Racial Equality.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What was the worst part about the Holocaust? -When it ended

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

What the black guy say to the Jew during the blizzard? I think it's snowing.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +103

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q: What do you call a black pilot? A: A pilot, you racist

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, leaving her unable to respond to external stimuli and thus unlikely to able to pass a basic driving test.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops