What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

What did the old lady say when she went to a restaurant? OH look at the price of this salad.

How do you make an eggroll? You push it.

Why did the boy eat the potato? I don't know. Neather do I. :(

Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

Why i Hate people. They are alive. The are breathing. The are near me.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

Whats worse than having a woman faking an orgasm? Having a guy fake one.

What do you get when you sunflower? Vegan turtles.

What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Leukemia

Why did the room packed with married people seem empty? Maybe they were all playing hide-and-seek. Or maybe the room was pitch black and they were all standing very still and quietly.

Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

9/11

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

2 women were sitting quietly.

a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone.

Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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