What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

yeah..

Tell somebody that someone told you they look like an owl. When they say "Who?" laugh in their face

what do you call a man in a hole Fill

Q: What does 'A' stand for? A: Effort

Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

One white male lives in a city with all blacks. He puts up with gang violence nearly every day.

Whats worse than a blonde jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car, and orphaning two little girls who are beat in the orphanage and become homeless and unimportant and consequently jumping off bridges themselves?

What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

What's worse than getting kicked by a horse? Drowning.

What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

How do you make an eggroll? You push it.

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone.

Yo mamma so fat, she probably has Type Two Diabetes - which is often associated with obesity - and should seek medical advice.

Knock Knock Who's there? It's me Ok, come in (the knockers voice was familiar enough that giving a name would have been out of place)

April showers bring may flowers, may flowers bring pilgrims, pilgrims bring diseases, diseases bring death, death brings... Well it's just death.

your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

What did the catholic priest say to the little boy? Nothing sexual, that kind of behavior isn't as widespread as people think.

What's the worst part about seeing a dead baby on the beach? The crushing sadness.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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