What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

Hello penis

Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

Barack Obama.

ON THE SEVENTH DAY OF JUNE, THURSDAY HAPPENED!!!! -ilikecrepes97

What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

Yo mamma so fat, she probably has Type Two Diabetes - which is often associated with obesity - and should seek medical advice.

Why did the boy eat the potato? I don't know. Neather do I. :(

An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

whats white and cant climb a fence? a fridge

One white male lives in a city with all blacks. He puts up with gang violence nearly every day.

what is small and is not fair Mitt Romneys tax rate

Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

A man walks into a bar. - - - - - - - - -

What did the black man say to the man from Kyrgyzstan? I've never heard of your country before.

What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

What did the old lady say when she went to a restaurant? OH look at the price of this salad.

what did the duck say to the hawk? quack

A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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