Tell somebody that someone told you they look like an owl. When they say "Who?" laugh in their face

Two men and a woman walk into a bar. They are all viciously murdered by a serial killer, who as he walks out, runs into a pole and suffers from a concussion, which he later dies from.

What happened when the irishman left the bar? he didnt

William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

What is worse than the Holocaust? a Michael Bay movie

How do you kill a baby quickly? The better question is why kill a baby quickly?

What's white and hides behind a tree? Shy milk.

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Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

Whats worse than a blonde jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car, and orphaning two little girls who are beat in the orphanage and become homeless and unimportant and consequently jumping off bridges themselves?

A black man, a Jew and a Hispanic man walk into a bar and the bartender says "Hello. What could I get for you?" The black man had a Manhattan. The Hispanic man had a Bloody Mary. The Jew merely had water, as his religion forbids alcohol. The trio enjoy their drinks and then exit the establishment.

My doctor recommended I take anger management classes. That really pisses me off.

Grandma walked into the kitchen...

What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

obamas trench

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

It’s dead.

What's worse than listening to Justin Beiber? Getting hit by a train.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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