A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

What's green and invisible? This cabbage

Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

Q. What language cant you speak A.Sign language

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? He had heard from a mutual friend that his ex-girlfriend, who he had recently broken up with, would be present at the same party and to avoid an awkward encounter he chose not to go.

Racial Equality.

A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

what is small and is not fair Mitt Romneys tax rate

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

Im ashamed of being from Canada

Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

whats worse that 3 black guys dieing in a train accident .... one was ur brother the other was gay

2 women were sitting quietly.

What's the worst part about seeing a dead baby on the beach? The crushing sadness.

Grandma walked into the kitchen...

i am a dwarf i have a big nose im a ranga nice to meet you julia

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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