Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are both eaten fifteen minutes later.

In Soviet Russia, You drive the car, fill it up with gas and park it Just like in America

Yo mama so stupid she tried to drown a dog and was quite successful at it. Know she serves a death sentence.

What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

Once upon a time, your face.

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

What did the widow get for mothers day A miscarriage

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

A man walks into a bar, has a few drinks and spots a nice looking lady He then follows her home and molestes her child.

Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

What's gold and looks like a brick? A gold brick. What's gold and looks like a nugget? A gold nugget. Whats gold and like a car? Gold. I lied about the car.

Suzie has no arms and no legs and is on a swing. what happened? she fell and died knock knock whos there? not suzie.

A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

What's worse than listening to Justin Beiber? Getting hit by a train.

What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

2 women were sitting quietly.

What's faster than a black guy with your TV? Probably someone who doesn't have to carry such a heavy object.

What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

What did the black man say to the man from Kyrgyzstan? I've never heard of your country before.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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