I'm so hungry I could eat food

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Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

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Why did the goblin have no friends? because no one likes a goblin, including other goblins.

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a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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What do you say to a black man on fire... Stop, drop and roll !!!

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How do you confuse a blonde? You ask her a question.

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What's the difference between a black man and a pile of shit ? One is a black man, the other is a pile of shit.

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What is green with wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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What's the worst part about seeing a dead baby on the beach? The crushing sadness.

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My doctor recommended I take anger management classes. That really pisses me off.

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What do you get when you combine KIA and NOKIA? A cheap vehicle with a cheap mobile phone inside.

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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" So let's set the world on fire..." Q: How do you do that? A: Strike a match...

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Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

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what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

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People eat. Thats because we poop. No its the other way around. Sloppy Joes. Thats what my poop looks like. Oh no im eating poop in between two buns!

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What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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got a new boxing bag the other day its hanging from the top of my stairs its called dead seb

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

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what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops