What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Whats worse than having a woman faking an orgasm? Having a guy fake one.

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What's worse than listening to Justin Beiber? Getting hit by a train.

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What do you get when you sunflower? Vegan turtles.

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Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

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Hi

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Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because that it where his friend Bob lives.

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Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

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What do you Call L.L. Cool J's mexican cousin? El El Bean

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Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

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Grandma walked into the kitchen...

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What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

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Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

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how do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? throw a mars bar off a cliff!

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Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

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Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rihno? Rihno-elephant

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

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What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

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national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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