What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

2 women were sitting quietly.

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Grandma walked into the kitchen...

Once upon a time, your face.

There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

What did the widow get for mothers day A miscarriage

A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

whats white and cant climb a fence? a fridge

what did the muffin say to the other muffin when they were in the oven? hi, im a muffin

One white male lives in a city with all blacks. He puts up with gang violence nearly every day.

In Soviet Russia, You drive the car, fill it up with gas and park it Just like in America

Why did the room packed with married people seem empty? Maybe they were all playing hide-and-seek. Or maybe the room was pitch black and they were all standing very still and quietly.

what is small and is not fair Mitt Romneys tax rate

Yo mama so stupid she tried to drown a dog and was quite successful at it. Know she serves a death sentence.

What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? He received many presents because his parents loved him very much.

A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

why did the black guy win a gold medal in the olympics? hard work, dedication and determanation! what no one else can be bothered to do anymore because of all this new technology and stuff!! get of your arse and do something active. NOW!

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing because polar bears lived in the northern hemisphere and penguins lived in the southern. But if one is smuggled from north to south or vice-versa. The polar would growl and consume the penguin.

What did the Muffin say to the other muffin ? I dont know

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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