Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

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Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

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what do you call a man that looks like will ferrel? jim

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

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What Does Alex J Simpsons Face have in Common with his hand? Spaghetti

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Ever heard of a funny black guy? Me either

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart... but the very next day your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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How do you make a Trucker cry? Kill his family and chop of his arms.

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What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

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Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

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whats white and cant climb a fence? a fridge

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your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

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why do pedo's molest children? because it feels really good.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

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What's red, yellow, and full of diabetes? Mcdonalds

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A blond was driving her car one day when "Party in the USA" came one the radio. She put her hands up; however, she realized she had to keep control of the car. She put one hand back on the steering wheel and arrived to her destination safely.

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what did batman say to robin before getting into the car? get in the car.

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Why did hale say I have but one life to give for my country? He has one life

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Why did the girl suck the other guy off? to get paid

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind.

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Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

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What's white and hides behind a tree? Shy milk.

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What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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