Those days where everything goes wrong, and you think to yourself "I just gotta do whats right here"... ...Sigh... 2. DO YOU KNOW WHY I HATE YOU SO MUCH? BECAUSE I HATE YOU! (Blame is on me, love and hate are not opposites, send me a copy of your book, and ill rip it out for you)

thumb_up thumb_down -181

What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

thumb_up thumb_down +142

agp

thumb_up thumb_down +112

What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did hale say I have but one life to give for my country? He has one life

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the girl suck the other guy off? to get paid

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

your mammas so fat she has to buy pants in the xxlarge section of the store

thumb_up thumb_down -6

*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the Muffin say to the other muffin ? I dont know

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What can be worst than letting someone you dont know run a chainsaw? Letting Smokey Dokey run a chainsaw!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

I've got a joke for you. The people writing these jokes. Thats a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man walks into a 1980's style restaurant he takes a seat and orders his meal.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the mime say when he met the clown. Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the cat say to another ? meow

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops