Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

What is worse than the Holocaust? a Michael Bay movie

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

Hey man how was your trip? great!!! It blew my mind

I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

My doctor recommended I take anger management classes. That really pisses me off.

roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

What happened when the irishman left the bar? he didnt

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

Yes and no, I am into literature, I am a writer, of how to rape and kill guides for the whole family (raping the whole family that is, again instructions for the whole family with inspirational quotes) Now give an example of each book to each family member without a cover stating what the book is... ...And after the first time, the world was never the same again.

WHO IS A CHIKEN???????????? I AM do you got a problem with that!!!!!!

Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

69

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

What's the difference between a black man and a pile of shit ? One is a black man, the other is a pile of shit.

what did the poor kid get from santa? Nothing santa hates poor kid, but the rich kid got a very nice convertable.

Im ashamed of being from Canada

What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? He received many presents because his parents loved him very much.

What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick and could not speak at all during his final weeks.

A black guy walks into a bar. When he saw the white bartender's bar he got offended. There were heads of hunted animals on the walls. He works for PETA.

two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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