What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Whats worse than a blonde jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car, and orphaning two little girls who are beat in the orphanage and become homeless and unimportant and consequently jumping off bridges themselves?

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Poop

thumb_up thumb_down -62

What do you Call L.L. Cool J's mexican cousin? El El Bean

thumb_up thumb_down -68

A black man, a Jew and a Hispanic man walk into a bar and the bartender says "Hello. What could I get for you?" The black man had a Manhattan. The Hispanic man had a Bloody Mary. The Jew merely had water, as his religion forbids alcohol. The trio enjoy their drinks and then exit the establishment.

thumb_up thumb_down -110

Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

thumb_up thumb_down +117

why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What's the difference between a duck A chair Vests have no sleeves

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What do you get when you combine KIA and NOKIA? A cheap vehicle with a cheap mobile phone inside.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What happened when the irishman left the bar? he didnt

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

thumb_up thumb_down -49

What is green with wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -161

I'm so hungry I could eat food

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Q: What's Lindsay Lohan getting for Christmas? A: AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +38

There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

who drinks pee? katness

thumb_up thumb_down -6

So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops