What did the catholic priest say to the little boy? Nothing sexual, that kind of behavior isn't as widespread as people think.

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Q: What's Lindsay Lohan getting for Christmas? A: AIDS

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A black walks into a Kentucky Fried Chicken. He was a customer.

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Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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who drinks pee? katness

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Q. What language cant you speak A.Sign language

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What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

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Roses are red Violets are blue (not really) I have Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Knock Knock Who's There? 9/11 9/11 who? You said you'd never forget.

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I'm so hungry I could eat food

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What did the cow get for Christmas? A tree

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Jews.

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What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

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What do you say to a black man on fire... Stop, drop and roll !!!

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two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

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Adam said to God, "God, I need a companion." God replied, "OK Adam, but you need to give up a rib." Adam agreed and thus humanity was born.

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What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Leukemia

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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