Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

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What's tastier than a dead baby? An orphaned dead baby.

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Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

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Why did the room packed with married people seem empty? Maybe they were all playing hide-and-seek. Or maybe the room was pitch black and they were all standing very still and quietly.

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Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

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Whats worse than a blonde jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car, and orphaning two little girls who are beat in the orphanage and become homeless and unimportant and consequently jumping off bridges themselves?

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Poop

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What do you Call L.L. Cool J's mexican cousin? El El Bean

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Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

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What's the difference between a duck A chair Vests have no sleeves

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What do you get when you combine KIA and NOKIA? A cheap vehicle with a cheap mobile phone inside.

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

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Once upon a time, your face.

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

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who drinks pee? katness

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What happened when the irishman left the bar? he didnt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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