What do you say to a black man on fire... Stop, drop and roll !!!

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what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

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Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

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Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

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Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

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A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

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What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

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Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

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9/11

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lol

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What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

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What is green with wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

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a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

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Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

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British Dentistry

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9/11

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Knock knock Who's There? Idk, who the **** names their kid There?

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what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

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what do you call a man in a hole Fill

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Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

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Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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