What did the old lady say when she went to a restaurant? OH look at the price of this salad.

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Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

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Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

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what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

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William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

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Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

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What's worse than listening to Justin Beiber? Getting hit by a train.

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whats worse that 3 black guys dieing in a train accident .... one was ur brother the other was gay

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A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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Hi

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A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

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Barack Obama.

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Why did the goblin have no friends? because no one likes a goblin, including other goblins.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

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Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

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a man died

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what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

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what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

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two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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