Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

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Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

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A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

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What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

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Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

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9/11

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What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

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What is green with wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

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a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

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Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

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roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

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British Dentistry

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Knock knock Who's There? Idk, who the **** names their kid There?

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what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

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what do you call a man in a hole Fill

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Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

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Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

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How does a black guy who murdered his wife get out of jail? He serves his sentence and is allowed to return back home.

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Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

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ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

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Hello penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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