A man walks into a bar. - - - - - - - - -

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Roses are Red Violets are blue Goldfish

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Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

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Why did the goblin have no friends? because no one likes a goblin, including other goblins.

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a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

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national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

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what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

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What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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who drinks pee? katness

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What's brown and sticky? A penis.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

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Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

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Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

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A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

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How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

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Barack Obama.

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agp

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what do you call a disabled black man getting beat up? an unfortunate human

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Why did hale say I have but one life to give for my country? He has one life

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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9/11

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a man died

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Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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