Hello penis

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Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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What did the catholic priest say to the little boy? Nothing sexual, that kind of behavior isn't as widespread as people think.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

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Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone.

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What do you call one black guy surrounded by eleven white guys? Wayne Simmonds

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Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

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Q. What language cant you speak A.Sign language

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Q: What does 'A' stand for? A: Effort

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Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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What would you get if I your donkey ate my chickens legs? A court order to have them seperated.

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Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

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What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

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Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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Why did the boy eat the potato? I don't know. Neather do I. :(

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What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

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Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

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Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

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how do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? throw a mars bar off a cliff!

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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What's white and sticky? Glue.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops