What's the difference between a duck A chair Vests have no sleeves

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

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What happened when the irishman left the bar? he didnt

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

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what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Why did a young boy fall off a building? Gravity.

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What is green with wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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agp

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I'm so hungry I could eat food

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what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

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I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

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Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

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What do you get when you sunflower? Vegan turtles.

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Why does my ass hurt I played gmod with a blackpeople

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face? The man replies "i have a huge malignant tumor in my chin"

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? If so, you're probably a pervert.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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