Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

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So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face? The man replies "i have a huge malignant tumor in my chin"

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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What's white and sticky? Glue.

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why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

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i am a dwarf i have a big nose im a ranga nice to meet you julia

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What do you get when you combine KIA and NOKIA? A cheap vehicle with a cheap mobile phone inside.

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Why did hale say I have but one life to give for my country? He has one life

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Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone.

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yeah..

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What do you call one black guy surrounded by eleven white guys? Wayne Simmonds

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A Mexican, and American, and a Chinese man are crossing the street. They all get hit by a car and die.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

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Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

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What would you get if I your donkey ate my chickens legs? A court order to have them seperated.

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My doctor recommended I take anger management classes. That really pisses me off.

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

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How do you make an eggroll? You push it.

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Once upon a time, your face.

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No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

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Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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