Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

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What do you say to a black man on fire... Stop, drop and roll !!!

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing because polar bears lived in the northern hemisphere and penguins lived in the southern. But if one is smuggled from north to south or vice-versa. The polar would growl and consume the penguin.

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what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

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What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

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What is worse than the Holocaust? a Michael Bay movie

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knock knock whos there not me

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ON THE SEVENTH DAY OF JUNE, THURSDAY HAPPENED!!!! -ilikecrepes97

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Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? One is a blood-sucking parasite, and the other practices law for a living.

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Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

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What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder lately? No? Neither has he.

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What do you Call L.L. Cool J's mexican cousin? El El Bean

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What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

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What do you call one black guy surrounded by eleven white guys? Wayne Simmonds

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

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Ever hear the joke about the black guy going to jail its not a joke.

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what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

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Why did the Dr love drop hit guitar? Because a bear walked into a bar and killed everyone in there including dr love and was then shot to death by police and animal control.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops