Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

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Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

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Grandma walked into the kitchen...

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What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

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What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

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What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

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What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

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Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

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two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

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Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

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Suzie has no arms and no legs and is on a swing. what happened? she fell and died knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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What is worse than the Holocaust? a Michael Bay movie

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what did the muffin say to the other muffin when they were in the oven? hi, im a muffin

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What's worse than listening to Justin Beiber? Getting hit by a train.

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hi

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your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

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There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he can't fly

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Ever hear the joke about the black guy going to jail its not a joke.

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ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

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Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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