what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

What's the difference between a black man and a pile of shit ? One is a black man, the other is a pile of shit.

Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

What's white and sticky? Glue.

i am a dwarf i have a big nose im a ranga nice to meet you julia

Once upon a time, your face.

What did the widow get for mothers day A miscarriage

Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

What do you call a black guy in college? A student.

Adam said to God, "God, I need a companion." God replied, "OK Adam, but you need to give up a rib." Adam agreed and thus humanity was born.

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Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

what is purple and hairy like a bear? A purple bear

What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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