Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

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Why are you going to thumbs this joke up? Because I use the words "Chuck Norris" Thus making it impossible to not thumbs up.

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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yeah..

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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who drinks pee? katness

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Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

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So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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Q: What does 'A' stand for? A: Effort

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What's tastier than a dead baby? An orphaned dead baby.

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I love you, you live me. Now get the FUDGE out of the tree!!!

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What do you get when you sunflower? Vegan turtles.

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What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

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why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

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what do you call a man that looks like will ferrel? jim

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Why did hale say I have but one life to give for my country? He has one life

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What do you get when you combine KIA and NOKIA? A cheap vehicle with a cheap mobile phone inside.

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How do you make an eggroll? You push it.

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

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Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

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Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

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Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

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ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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