What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

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Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

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So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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2 women were sitting quietly.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

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A black walks into a Kentucky Fried Chicken. He was a customer.

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

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What do you call one black guy surrounded by eleven white guys? Wayne Simmonds

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

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What's brown and sticky? A penis.

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what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

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ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

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Why does my ass hurt I played gmod with a blackpeople

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What would you get if I your donkey ate my chickens legs? A court order to have them seperated.

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What's white and sticky? Glue.

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what do you call a man that looks like will ferrel? jim

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What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

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What do you get when you combine KIA and NOKIA? A cheap vehicle with a cheap mobile phone inside.

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

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Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

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what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

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Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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