What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Leukemia

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

hi

your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

why did the man die? because he died.

What's white and sticky? Glue.

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

i am a dwarf i have a big nose im a ranga nice to meet you julia

What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he can't fly

Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

what did the muffin say to the other muffin when they were in the oven? hi, im a muffin

Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

What's worse than listening to Justin Beiber? Getting hit by a train.

Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

Grandma walked into the kitchen...

What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

Suzie has no arms and no legs and is on a swing. what happened? she fell and died knock knock whos there? not suzie.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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