What is black, white, and red, and can't turn around in a hallway? A nun with a spear through her head.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens are raised on farms, which are away from society. They are taken care of in pens, and have no way of escaping. Therefore it couldn't have crossed any roads.

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whats brown and smells like shit shit

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What can't taste with a toung, and it's soul never dies? A shoe

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I'm off to my tank guys!

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What is big, red, and beats rocks? A big, red, rock beater.

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Why do Italian people like pasta? Because it tastes good.

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A Priest and a Rabbi pass a Muslim boy sleeping on the street. The Priest remarks "What a tragedy"; the Rabbi agrees and they both open non-denominational homeless shelters in their temples.

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two men are having a conversation a third man walks what does he do? patiently waits as to not seem rude.

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What's white and sticky? A sticky polar bear.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

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What is the best part about football The scoring

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Okay, So a Cow, a Lumberjack and a Fireman walk into a bar. The cow asks the bartender, "What kind of milk do you have?" The bartender looks confused and asks," Why would a cow want milk?" The cow replies,"I've been producing milk all my life and I've never had a chance to try it. I'd just like some milk." The bartender replies,"Okay we have whole milk, 2%, and skim milk. What'll you have?" The cow says,"Whole milk, I want the whole deal." The bartender obliges. Next the Lumberjack comes up to the bar. The bartender asks, "What'll you have?" The lumberjack asks for some syrup. The bartender inquiries,"What kind of syrup would you like?" The lumberjack answers,"Pure Maple, imitation, or chocolate. All work for me." The bartender turns and pours a shot of pure maple syrup and turns away. Finally the fireman walks up the the bartender and says, "Can I have a glass of water?" The bartender turn and ask inquisitively,"Why?" The fireman quickly replies,"TO PUT OUT THE FIRE!"...

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What's black and tasteless? either herpes or a redheads soul

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What's the worst part about being drunk? Your child.

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A friend asks his buddy, "Hey, what's your favorite color?" Buddy slowly turns his head and stares intensely at the only black person in the room and says," "White." Buddy has never been called racist.

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Why was Hellen Kellers leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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Your mom’s so dumb she forgot to update her WordPress installation and now she has pharmaceutical links all over her page.

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What do you do if a blond throw a grenade at you? Take the pin out and throw it back

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' cheese

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whats retarded and looks like a fat duck? GEorge goodburn

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Money is no object. Because I don't have any.

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What was the doctor's shirt made out of? Cotton

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Your momma is so dumb, that when she took the IQ test her scores were considerably lower then average.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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