Q.What did the muffin say when the other muffin said, "How ya doin'?" A."HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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What number comes after 29? 30.

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yo mama so dumb she got hit by a parked car. ~YN~

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How much dirt was in a hole that was 6 feet wide and 6 feet deep? None. It's a hole.

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Two tubes of ice cream are sitting in a freezer, one turns to the other and says "its bloody freezing in here" God then corrects this apparent mistake in the combined laws of physics and biology

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who do hannah morgan and bonnie do in their free time? ANTI JOKEZ

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Robert supra not deep throwing kaleb law wrench

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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What's the cutest thing about a redhead? I know, I couldnt think of anything either

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There was a man from the hood, His limericks weren't very good, So he decided to become a purveyor of monogrammed handkerchiefs and other fine linen products.

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How do you keep a puppy warm? You throw it in the fire...

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What's worse than your family dying in a fire? Nothing, that really sucks.

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A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a potocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "Hey, we don't serve their kind here! Your droids will have to wait outside." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Why don't you wait out by the speeder, we don't want any trouble." The protocol droid replies, "I heartily agree, sir."

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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What do you call a guy who hangs around with musicians? A groupie.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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Where did the little girl go when the bomb went off? Everywhere

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What's 9+10=? 19

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Thumbs down if you like this anti-joke!

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A man walks into a bar. The other one ducks.

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A germaphobe is in a room full of sick people. He leaves.

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What did Michael Jackson think when someone threw a tomato off his head? The same as he was thinking before it happened, because everything that goes through Michael Jackson's head is pornographic images.

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Hey i just F****d you, And this is crazy, Delete my number, And keep the baby!

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Doctor- Mr. Smith I have some bad news for you. Mr. Smith- Just tell it to me straight. How long have I got? Doctor- Not long. Mr. Smith- OK.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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