The only silverware Frank Lampard will be lifting this year is his mums urn.

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Whats a box full of sand? a sandsquare

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Two Haitians walk into a bar and it collapses

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I doubt it thought much about this. The chicken is a simple animal, and i doubt its actions were spurred by any particular motivation.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Why couldn't she get back up? She blew up

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A bear walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What'll it be." The bear mauls his face off and kills several other patrons before police show up and fire three rounds in it's face.

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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You are in England which has a law about not moving traffic when these idk some kinda swans cross the road. You see a fat woman in a car and she is waiting for the swans to cross the road and she can't drive the car else she would get in trouble by law. What do you do? Feed her

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What did the muffin say to the oven? Obviously nothing since neither one can talk.

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Q. How is a monkey like a tricycle? A. They both have handlebars... except for the monkey.

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Q. Why was the dad sad? A.His favorite team lost in the championship.

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Why did the girl jump? Because she was on a trampoline.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? The video game he really wanted.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike with no handle bars or pedals.

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whats wierder than two lesbians kissing two homos kissing

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if I was a girl I would be touching my self everywhere if I was a girl as a boy I would make a diffrence in poltics but thats not gonna happen.

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A man walks into a bar. He then meets some friends and has a rather enjoyable night.

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Q: How many jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 6 million and 1

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Knock Knock Come in

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What's worse than sibling rivalry? having no bones

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How did the girl die? 25.

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What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

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What's the difference between Justin Bieber and a gay guy? They're both gay

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What's Funnier than this joke? Lee Evans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops