#scabbers

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Q: How do all 5 gay guys walk? A: In One Direction

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I'm gay. No homo.

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[] i have read and agree to the terms of service Nope

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A moose walks into a grocery store, he asks the deer where he could find some bisquits, the deer says "oh it's in aigle 6." So the moose goes to aigle 6...and there ain't no bisquits!

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two men are having a conversation a third man walks what does he do? patiently waits as to not seem rude.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How did the chicken get out of the henhouse?

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I love you You love me Barney gave me HIVS It started with a hug and ended on the floor IVE BEEN RAPED BY A DINOSAUR!

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Why did the bartender cry when a construction worker ordered a Jack and Coke? His son Jack had run away five years ago to sell cocaine; his father hadn't seen him since.

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Whats big, yellow and red? a school bus with a bunch of dead children.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a bus.

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What do you call a bunch of Mexicans on fire? Jumping Beans.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' cheese

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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http://attachments.conceptart.org/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=351301&stc=1&d=1208673890

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roses are red, violets are blue. Barack Obama says, nice to meet you.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as he wants to.

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Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

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When life gives you aids, make aids-aid.

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What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

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Why did the woman walk into the men's clothing store? She's a lesbian. Why did the man walk into the womens clothing store? He had to buy his mom a birthday present.

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A man walks into a bar, and orders a drink. He reaches into his back pocket, but cannot find his wallet. The man was pick pocketed by a skilled thief on his walk to the bar. The man quickly makes calls to cancel his credit cards and minimize the financial loss.

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How did the priest die? Masterbation

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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