What's worse than stubbing your toe? Watching your house burn down and your family scream in pain as their flesh burns and you suffer from chronic depression.

What do you call a black person with food stamps? A freeloader.

What did nike say to addidas? Hi

Yo mama's so fat that she took a look at her life and realized she wanted a change so she joined a dieting group and started eating better and exercising more and she got down to her goal weight and now looks and feels better than ever it's very inspirational, good for her.

How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax

What Does the Duck Say? "Got any grapes?"

Why didn't the little boy get to go to the movies on his birthday? He was both blind and deaf, completely defeating the purpose of going to the movies.

A friend asks his buddy, "Hey, what's your favorite color?" Buddy slowly turns his head and stares intensely at the only black person in the room and says," "White." Buddy has never been called racist.

Two guys walk into the woods an saw a naked lady.One guys ran away. When his friend met up with him he ask why did u run away. He siad "my mom said if i a naked lady that i would turn to stone and i felt myself getting hard."

why was the boy's face burnt? a horrible accident involving a lighter and some hairspray

What did the leper say to the prostitute? Hello Prostitute.

Do you have a curfew? No its saturday!

An eggo waffle had three friends that he will be inviting to his Superman birthday party. WHich friend will get the first piece of cake? Nobody the party was canceled.

I'm gay. No homo.

asparagus

What do you do if a blond throw a grenade at you? Take the pin out and throw it back

What did the girl with no hands get? Gloves.

Knock Knock Whose there. Mike Mike seriously I told you to stop coming here or ill call the police But I just wanted to talk to you Ok thats it im calling the police

whats retarded and looks like a fat duck? GEorge goodburn

What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

Struggling with self esteem? Wish you were more attractive? Well stop wishing you fugly cum dumpster.

What's worse than eating a piece of elephant shit? Eating two pieces of elephant shit.

The weels on the bus go...flat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...