Q: What do you get when Justin Bieber gets his own tv show? A: suiside!

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Where did the Welsh man work? At an office complex.

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Why did Mary fall of the tire swing? Because she's a dumbass

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What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

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Why did the dog bark at the tall white man? Because the tall white man was in the process of attempting to rob the house in which said dog was situated. The dog was merely defending its patch.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Alex Eggbert

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What is hotter than two girls making out? The Sun.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

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What do apples and bananas have in common? They're both red (except for bananas).

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how do you keep a black kid from jumping on the bed? pick up a parenting book ask him nicely try a time out not care because he's a kid and hes supposed to jump on beds?

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How do you survive in the wilderness? You nail an orphan to a rock underwater.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, WTF is this, i gotta take a piss.

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Why can't Sean slam dunk cos he has no arms -•#21

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Your mom is so fat, She should go to a doctor because her cholesterol is abnormally high.

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Why did the man get thrown out of the cinema? The man began to masturbate. He was also blind.

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What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

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Bob goes swimming in the ocean. Due to the fact that his father sexually abused him as a child, and never taught him how to swim, he drowns.

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What do you get when you cross a cantaloupe and a dog? "Melon-choly"

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What did Greg say to John? Nothing. Greg died in a horrible plane crash

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't, there were no roads back then

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What do you call a puppy with no limbs? It doesn't matter, he's never coming back.

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Two guys walk into the woods an saw a naked lady.One guys ran away. When his friend met up with him he ask why did u run away. He siad "my mom said if i a naked lady that i would turn to stone and i felt myself getting hard."

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What did nike say to addidas? Hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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