I love you You love me Barney gave me HIVS It started with a hug and ended on the floor IVE BEEN RAPED BY A DINOSAUR!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats big, yellow and red? a school bus with a bunch of dead children.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a bunch of Mexicans on fire? Jumping Beans.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

http://attachments.conceptart.org/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=351301&stc=1&d=1208673890

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as he wants to.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

roses are red, violets are blue. Barack Obama says, nice to meet you.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -1

010011100110100101100011011001010010000001110100011100100111100100101100001000000110001001110101011101000010000001110100011010000110010100100000011010100110111101101011011001010010000001101001011100110010000001110011011011110110110101100101011101110110100001100101011100100110010100100000011001010110110001110011011001012

thumb_up thumb_down -1

When life gives you aids, make aids-aid.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the woman walk into the men's clothing store? She's a lesbian. Why did the man walk into the womens clothing store? He had to buy his mom a birthday present.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man walks into a bar, and orders a drink. He reaches into his back pocket, but cannot find his wallet. The man was pick pocketed by a skilled thief on his walk to the bar. The man quickly makes calls to cancel his credit cards and minimize the financial loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q. Why did Mary fall down the steps? A. Because she had no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How did the priest die? Masterbation

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do JFK and Hitler have in common? They died.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Dancing Potatoe!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the difference between a duck and a belt? One floats in water and I don't remember the rest but you are a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

girl: Daddie, what's at the end of a rainbow? Dad: No sweetie, a rainbow is acually just an illusion constructed by the refraction of light white as it passes through a water particle in the stratophere. Acting as a prisom the particle will seperate the different components of light, ordering them by the rank of the light energy and the intencity of it's frequency and wavelength.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A black person and a hispanic person are in a car, who is driving? The black person, after all it's his car.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why is it as hot as the sun? Because it is the sun

thumb_up thumb_down -5

i'm not gay

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops