Chuck Norris can bench 210 pounds.

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Ask me if I'm a giraffe Are you a giraffe? Yes

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PENlS.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? The video game he really wanted.

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What did Dela Ware? Nothing.

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How much dirt was in a hole that was 6 feet wide and 6 feet deep? None. It's a hole.

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do you know what i see in the perfect girl? my dick.

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Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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whats better then 10 babies nailed to 1 tree... 1 baby nailed to 10 trees!

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A black man didn't walk into a bar

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Two tubes of ice cream are sitting in a freezer, one turns to the other and says "its bloody freezing in here" God then corrects this apparent mistake in the combined laws of physics and biology

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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Ask me if you can see my dinosaur. Can I see your dinosaur? No dinosaurs don't exist sillyhead!

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What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to there son who got an A- in math? How would I know? I can't speak Chinese.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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Why did Billy want cancer? So he could be like his parents.

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your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

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The mighty wizard said "come fourth cowardly lion and receive bravery" but he came fifth and got absolutely nothing. Todo came fourth and got the bravery.

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What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs sitting on a bench? Nothing. Why would you harrass a guy with no arms and no legs.

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Penis in a butthole. Consentual Sex.

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What's small, cold, and lifeless? A dead baby.

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Doctor- Mr. Smith I have some bad news for you. Mr. Smith- Just tell it to me straight. How long have I got? Doctor- Not long. Mr. Smith- OK.

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"Hell nahhh I called shotgun" -Rosa Parks

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What did the beaver say to the other beaver? Nothing because beavers are wild, indigenous species thus incapable of speech.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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