Why does Santa go down your chimney? Because he is to retarded to use the door.

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Why did the ant cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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what do men with small penises use as condoms? appropriately sized condoms.

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Your mom's so fat that she went in to get liposuction and subsequently died from infection.

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what does adolf hitler and jewish people have in common? they *** and **** but **** will always **** that hard but **** is ****** up rather ******, and they don't eat bacon

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Are you a human?

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Q: What is worse than seven babies in a trash can? A: One baby in seven trash cans. Q: What is worse than one baby in seven trash cans? A: The Holocaust.

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Whats black and smells like white paint? A) Black paint!

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peter charastabopouloulous

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Three surfers paddle out into the surf. They had a pretty good time, except one of them got a shit ton of water up his nose.

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roses are red violets are blue oranges are......

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Q: What do Obama and George Washington have in common? A: They are both intelligent, trustworthy presidents who truly care for what is best for the United States. Except for Obama.

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Alex Eggbert

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A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

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why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't, there were no roads back then

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, get in my bed so i can fu** you!

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Whats red and eats like dog? A fox.

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A Japanese woman walks into a Korean deli, and asks the Korean man if she can buy some groceries. They are able to get past their cultural differences, and share their favorite recipes.

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A christian was diagnosed with cancer. He refused chemo and prayed to god. Eventually, he died.

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what did the american say to the other american? get out of the way i gotta go to mcdonalds!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had sinned.

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hey what are you eating there? a giant scorpion that tried to rape me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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