Knock knock. Who's there? Open the fucking door. Open it! This is a fucking robbery. This is not a fucking joke. Get down on the ground. Shut that baby up. Shut that fucking baby up! Now! Get on the fucking ground or I swear to Christ I will fucking end your life. Tell the kids to go to their room. Do it. Do it, you fucking bitch! Where's the fucking jewelry? You got any money stashed anywhere? Come on, I know it's here. Keys? Your husband got any guns? Give me everything valuable or I swear to god, I will fucking murder you in front of your son. The woman was brutally raped for hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's chris benoit doing? Just hangin in the gym

thumb_up thumb_down +13

a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock, Knock Who's there? Joseph. Joseph who? Joseph Brown. Oh, hello Joseph! Why don't you come in? No thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's ur favorite color? Cancer Made by mark

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican guy walk into a bar. They are good interracial friends that like to put down some brewski's with eachother

thumb_up thumb_down +13

how do you fall off a building? you trip.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Frog-why did the chicken cross the road Chicken-dont judge me...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Sally fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the frog fall out the tree it was dead. Why did the second frog fall out the tree it was stapled to the first frog. Why did the third frog fall from to the tree peer pressure. Why did the fourth frog fall from the tree the third frog was his son. Why did the fifth frog fall from the tree he thought it was a game. Why did the sixth frog fall from the tree he shared the same body with the fifth frog

thumb_up thumb_down +11

(Two person joke for an audience Joke Teller. "What's the difference between a rabbit and a cowsay?" Accomplice "a what?" Joke Teller. "a cowsay?" Accomplice "what's a cowsay?" Joke Teller. "Mooooooo"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

womens rights to vote

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why does Santa go down your chimney? Because he is to retarded to use the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why is Justin Bieber gay? He prefers the companionship of homosexual relationship to that of a heterosexual one.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you get when you mix your mom and your dad? YOU!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How many dead babies can fit in a bathtub. Twelve. A previous joke said seventeen, that person had their facts wrong. I know from experience

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Your mother called last night. She wants her recipe back.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas ? Because sadly his father is an alcoholic and cant support him nor his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

general tso's broccoli

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you get if you cross James Bond with Osama bin Laden? James bin Laden.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? ..... he didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +11

roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme but this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops