Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I'm your stalker, welcome to my deserted warehouse.

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The mighty wizard said "come fourth cowardly lion and receive bravery" but he came fifth and got absolutely nothing. Todo came fourth and got the bravery.

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Roses are red, Violets aren't blue, They're fucking violet, And I hate you.

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Why did the depressed teenager die? Because he had cancer.

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Sex is not the answer. Sex is a question. Yes is the answer.

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fack me!

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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Wanna hear a joke? JORDAN SANDERS IN A RELATIONSHIP.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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A muslim gets on a plane. He is then flown to his destination.

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A black man walks in to a bar, and is promptly escorted from the premises, for being under the age of 21

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies In a tub 10 and 1/2

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How do you make time fly? Well! You cannot really make time fly. Imean, yeah, iguess it feels like time flies when your having fun, but it moves just as fast as always!

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Botanically speaking, cheese can't fry bagels.

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What would you call the fatty cranial mass surrounding a malignant tumor? Ted Kennedy's Head.

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The mailman saw little Johnny sitting on the side of the street with an old coffee can Mailman: What do you have in that can there? Johnny: dog shit Mailman: what the fuck

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A Chinese man walked into a bar. He now has a minor concussion.

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What do you call bad anti-jokes? Suckish comedy What do you call suckish comedy? Bad anti-jokes

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How do you save someones life? Do not kill them.

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After dinner, my girlfriend told me that we should go to my room to play with eachother's toys. It was very fun, I've always enjoyed the plastic dinosaur she decided to bring over.

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What did the homeless man without legs and arms, get for Christmas? ... Cancer

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What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

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Why... ...did the chicken cross the road?

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Knock knock. Come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops