what's big fat and hairy yo mamma

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Why did the man have trouble breathing after meeting the President? He had a collapsed lung.

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what do you call a black man being hung from a tree? -prejudice

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what's faster than an asian on a bicylce on payday? many things

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Why did bob die Cause he got hit by a mailbox

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Why didn't the boy get his sister a birthday present? Because it wasn't her birthday.

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That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

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If life throws you melons you might be dyslexic, but you also might not be.

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One man says to another "Hey you have banana in your ears." The other man replies "I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

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what did the man see in the mirror? Nothing, he was blind.

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roses ar red vilots ar blue i have hiv

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure Niiiiggggeeee what is the last letterThe last letter is NOT and R! Its an R. Good job honey

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haha, you're an orphan

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A Priest, a Minister, and a Rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, "What is this, a joke?"

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Q: "What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?" A: Dr. Dre

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Why does no one we talk about Nagasaki, they got bombed too...

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A teacher notices one of her students clutching a cat. She asks him why. The boy, tearfully, explains that he heard his father tell his mother that he was going to eat her pussy when the kids left for school. The teacher laughs and, the class being 10-11 years old thereby at an age approaching biological curiosity, decides to mix this in with a sex education video she was planning on showing them a few weeks later. She then phones the boy's parents who come to collect the cat while reassuring the boy that it is in no danger. The cat was popular with the boy's classmates and they would often go to visit him as a result. Many years later, just after the boy started attending university, the cat was put to sleep at the age of 13 due to liver cancer. The boy placed a Facebook post in honour of his feline friend, which was spotted by a former classmate of his in a routine search who happened to be attending the same university. They ended up reacquainting and beginning a sexual relationship, which was how the boy lost his virginity and eventually blossomed into a 37-year marriage resulting in three children.

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What did Helen Keller see on her trip? Nothing

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Scientist 1: "What's your research paper about?" Scientist 2: "Homosexuality in fruit bats." Scientists 3, 4 & 5: "AHAHAHAHA LOL WUT"

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Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

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Bye, Ax... Nerochan, you just gonna leave me in this state? I mean wont you stop it? I know hypnosis and all but I mean I have like black belt in hypnosis but since you began it, I do not really want to stop it.

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A dentist, a librarian, a construction worker, a gynecologist, a zookeeper, a shoemaker, a terrorist, a politician, a cyclist, a truck driver, a kangaroo, a Mexican, a blonde, a Jewish black guy, a Honda Civic, a monkey, a penguin, an FBI agent, a stock broker, a president of a foreign country, a CEO of a very wealthy company regarding AIDS, a founder of one of top downloaded apps in the market, a chief executive, a cook, a waitress, a priest, a nun, a little boy, a fairy, a dinosaur, and a skeleton walks into a bar. There's no punchline.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Being a jew in the Holocaust.

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Why doesn't Gary like me? Because I killed his family and fed them to him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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