A man walks into a bar. His friend follows him in, but the first man doesn't know he's there. They both order a beer, then a couple strong shots. The first man then notices his friend, and they exchange high-fives. The man's friend says, "Hey, how ya doin?" The first man says, "Okay, I guess, but I forgot the punchline." So the second man orders his friend the strongest drink, and the weakest. He replies, "Me too, Joe. Meeeeee, too."

Do you want to hear an anti joke? No.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a fish.

I went to the zoo yesterday. There was only one dog, it was a shitzu

fack me!

Hi Shelby!!

What's white and likes to likes to take frequent jogs? Stephen Hawkings, I meant so say remain motionless

How did the cat die of indigestion? Indigestion

68 :)

Roses are red, Violets aren't blue, They're fucking violet, And I hate you.

Did you hear about Judith? she was hit by a bus!

Why didn't the monkey fall out of the tree when someone threw a refrigerator at it? Because it was already lying on the floor dying of AIDS.

Knock Knock Hows there Theres no time for this you have AIDS

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

What do you call 100 black people at the bottom of the ocean? An unfortunate tragedy and astonishingly ironic curcumstance.

Knock. Knock Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim your best friend.

what do u call a girl with cancer? bald.

What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? heart worms

whats funny? laughing at people when they die a slow and painful death.

What did the black man say to the Mexican? What a fine day it is!

Why did the baby start crying? Its mom slapped it in the face, causing permanent brain damage that would haunt it throughout its life.

hey

How do you starve a celebrity? Tell them they're fat.

A stop sign walks into a bar. Looks like somebody invented walking stop signs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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