How do you kill 23 kids? You put 24 kids in an arena.

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Alex Eggbert

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Thomas the Tank Engine could see Express up ahead on the tracks! His driver shut off steam and applied his brakes. Ahead of him Gordon groaned "Ohhhhh stop your train! Stop your train! His driver and fireman jumped out quickly. Thomas tried his very hardest and eventually found himself slowing down. But there wasn't enough time and Thomas smashed right into the express. Seven people were killed and Thomas himself was smashed to pieces.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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5

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Knock Knock Who's there? Rob Rob! I haven't seen you in ages come on in.

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Q - what did one plate say to the other? A - FOods on me tonight!

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Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A bad decision because soccer is in their blood

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Do you have a curfew? No its saturday!

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knock knock whose there? my penis.

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When life gives you aids, make aids-aid.

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Why was the boy sad? He had just been in a terrible car accident in which he witnessed his entire family die painful, violent deaths, thus he suffered survivor's guilt. Also he dropped his ice cream.

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Why was Hellen Kellers leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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What do you get when you cross a fan with a child? A mess that you now have to clean up.

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What's white and sticky? A sticky polar bear.

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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Knock knock who's there? Hi! where from the church of latter day saints!

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a kangaroo walks in to a bar and sits down. Kangaroo's live in Auustralia

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A Japanese man walks into a bar, it collapses and then is demolished by a tsunami.

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What is the difference between a doorknob? Toast.

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Why does Michael Jackson have difficulty playing chess? Because he's dead, and if there is an afterlife, we don't actually have the ability to know that it is possible to play chess there.

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Do Minnesotans have accents? Oh ya, you betchya.

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roses are red, violets are blue. Barack Obama says, nice to meet you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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