Why did jack smell smoke in his neighborhood? His house burnt to the ground.

Four homosexuals walk into a bar. They notice that there's only one stool left at the bar itself. They sat at a table with four chairs. They had a delightful time.

What do you call a bird on the beach? A seagull.

Whats more sad then four black men in a car driving off a cliff? The man they stolen the car from doesn't have car insurance.

Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

What did the cow do when it got run over by a tractor? It died.

Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

Six hats walk out of a garden. When mustard offal fruit paps.

knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Wayne Gacy.

How can you tell if a Mexican's gay? Ask politely.

crime in multi story is wrong on so many levels!

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

what did the farmer say to the cowgirl that made her positive that she had a weird laugh? you have a weird laugh.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to.

Thomas Hobbes had a happy life. Actually he didnt, he was born prematurely causing his mother to die. Then his dad left him at an early age to the care of an abusive older brother because he was an alcohollic. He did inspire many political beliefs though

Amputations.

Why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off. haha its funny

Whats long and hard on a black man..... 2nd grade

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his crotch... The bartender calls the police as the man is arrested as piracy an act of robbery or criminal violence.

A man drops a penny between a Jew and a homosexual. The man says "oh excuse me," picks up his penny and continues with his day.

A man walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

verry nice how mUCH?

Halts Maul Reid. Das ist, was ich rede.

Knock Knock Who's there its me... we need to talk go away tod. i told you never to come back here babe, just open the door why? so you can beat me again? i said i was sorry! i just want to see my little girl... well maybe you should of been there for us! babe... i love you you lying son of a bitch... you dont deserve us open the damn door or i will beat it down im calling the cops YOU BETTER NOT BITCH! I WILL BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU! tod... please... get out come here no... NO! get the hell off of me!!!! HELP!! RAPE!! RAPE!!! SHUT UP WHORE (crying) please... please... ...mommy? SARAH! GET OUT OF THE HOUSE! MOMMY LOVES YOU! ooh.. theres my little girl. you miss daddy? GET AWAY FROM HER!!! SHUT UP BITCH! come give daddy a hug what have you done to mommy? what you want some too? SARAH I SAID GET OUT THE HOUSE! GET HELP! ...mommy im scared... (sob) oh your crying? you want something to cry about? OH ILL GIVE YOU SOMETHING TO CRY ABOUT! .... you better get the hell out of here tod.. whoah... babe where did you get a gun GET OUT babe... put the gun down... relax NO YOU RELAX! all these years ive been raising this baby. without you. all by myself. and i dont want you in the picture now. ILL DO WHAT I DAMN WELL PLEASE ill see you in hell... (BANG) (BANG)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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