Why didn't Timothy wish his dad a Happy Father's Day? His dad died yesterday in a car accident.

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Thomas the Tank Engine could see Express up ahead on the tracks! His driver shut off steam and applied his brakes. Ahead of him Gordon groaned "Ohhhhh stop your train! Stop your train! His driver and fireman jumped out quickly. Thomas tried his very hardest and eventually found himself slowing down. But there wasn't enough time and Thomas smashed right into the express. Seven people were killed and Thomas himself was smashed to pieces.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? She's dead.

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Why did the train crash? Because the conductor was a cucumber.

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What did Greg say to John? Nothing. Greg died in a horrible plane crash

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I love you You love me Barney gave me HIVS It started with a hug and ended on the floor IVE BEEN RAPED BY A DINOSAUR!

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2 dogs one jar of peanut butter

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What did nike say to addidas? Hi

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If 1 + 2 = 3 Then, what does 2 + 1 equal? It equals 3 due to the fact that reversing the order of numbers does not change the outcome of the equation :D

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A Priest and a Rabbi pass a Muslim boy sleeping on the street. The Priest remarks "What a tragedy"; the Rabbi agrees and they both open non-denominational homeless shelters in their temples.

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No it isn't.

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Why Is Jarrod spencer gay Coz he is

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What do you call someone allergic to water ? Waterproof

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Q:If a lesbian woman is wearing a jean jacket, high heels, camouflage shorts, and sunglasses, what gender is she ? A: Sheep.

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Do Minnesotans have accents? Oh ya, you betchya.

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Type 17 diabetes. Hepatitis R. Pubic Lice. Just Pubic Lice.

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Q: What's black and blue and hates sex? A: The 8-year-old boy tied up in my garage.

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Sonic

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Barack Obama, George W. Bush and Dick Cheney are in a room, what are they doing? A: Breathing

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Whats green all over and travels at 100mph A christmas tree in a gokart

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What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

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-What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. Animals can't talk dumbass.

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Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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What is the most hardest math known to man kind? 1+1=?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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