What did the Groom give to his Bride on their honeymoon? Herpes.

I love you You love me Barney gave me HIVS It started with a hug and ended on the floor IVE BEEN RAPED BY A DINOSAUR!

why was the man gay? because he likes men.

What do you get when you cross a cantaloupe and a dog? "Melon-choly"

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, I Love The Music Only Jazz and Blues.

Whats hairless, looks like a bel end and stinks of onions. Adey Bradley

Thomas the Tank Engine could see Express up ahead on the tracks! His driver shut off steam and applied his brakes. Ahead of him Gordon groaned "Ohhhhh stop your train! Stop your train! His driver and fireman jumped out quickly. Thomas tried his very hardest and eventually found himself slowing down. But there wasn't enough time and Thomas smashed right into the express. Seven people were killed and Thomas himself was smashed to pieces.

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? She's dead.

hi

What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

Yo mama so fat!... we are very concerned for her health.

Two Japanese men walked out of a bar. They drowned.

How do you crash an airplane? By not knowing how to fly it.

Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

What's white and sticky? A sticky polar bear.

A kangaroo walks into a bar, it is a fairly common occurrence in Australia and normal process is carried out of evacuating the premises and calling animal control to deal with the situation.

Knock Knock Whose there. Mike Mike seriously I told you to stop coming here or ill call the police But I just wanted to talk to you Ok thats it im calling the police

is this the krusty crab? no this is child services were taking your children.

Knock knock who's there? Hi! where from the church of latter day saints!

Why do mexicans have so many children??? Because condoms resemble skinny balloons.

What's the same about eggnog and a computer? You can search the web. Except that's only true for one of them.

What did the Farmer say to his tractor? Most likely his life story, Farmers arn't always the most popular.

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

The bird is not the word.... Its two

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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