What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Ill wait for you as long as you need Nero, I am just so glad you are alive and well... I know you, you would not be this chatty unless you where doing far worse, I know you will recover, dont think about the time for my sake, ill refresh this page every five minutes or so.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats more crazy? Stabbing someone or killing someone? I don't know thats why I am asking you

thumb_up thumb_down +22

27

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why did the farmer cry after a phone call? he just found out his wife just died of lung cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +22

whats wierder than two lesbians kissing two homos kissing

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's brown and green and if it falls out of a tree on top of you, it will kill you? A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why didn't the boy run the marathon? He was cripple.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Two women were sitting together, quietly.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the jew pick up the unicorn lying on the sidewalk? Because he dropped it.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN's ON FIRE!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Hey i just F****d you, And this is crazy, Delete my number, And keep the baby!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the man go to the barber? To get a haircut

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a helicopter above Hawaii? A helicopter.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What happens when you play a country song backwards? Gibberish.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a red sports car? A red sports car was never a living organism.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots. They all miss.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

An eyeball walks into a bar and the bartender asks him what he would like. The bartender promptly wakes up in jail because he was caught having a meth lab in his basement.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

If I could change one thing about the alphabet, knd stte bporw xzuor flllle !

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How did the man with no arm and no legs get to the store? Well he certainly didn't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Yo mama's so fat that when she stepped on a scale, she saw her ex-boyfrien's phone number!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why don't blind men skydive? Because it would be unwise for a man who can't see to be jumping out of planes, completely unaware of his surroundings.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops