Roses are red, Violets are blue, What are you doing, I'm ithyphallophobic.

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Women's Rights.

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Ask me if i am a tree are you a tree? no

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this sentence will not monkey banana pie

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what happened to the autistic child that traveled to antarctica? he died.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Life is an abstract object incapable of handing out gifts, thus if given a lemon by life you should go to a doctor to make sure you don't have an undiagnosed disease.

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haha, you're an orphan

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Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

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knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

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What do you call: A black person, A white person, A mexican, A Jew, And an athiest? Whatever their names are!

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A seal walks into a club and gets hammered.

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Bye, Ax... Nerochan, you just gonna leave me in this state? I mean wont you stop it? I know hypnosis and all but I mean I have like black belt in hypnosis but since you began it, I do not really want to stop it.

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A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

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what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

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Helen got hit by a bus. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Helen!!

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How much does a polar bear weigh? The average male weights approximately 1150lbs.

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why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

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Q: How do you learn the best break dance moves? A: I don't know. You figure it out.

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Why did the mom go to jail? She committed infanticide. lol.

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Why doesn't Gary like me? Because I killed his family and fed them to him.

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How do you burn a lot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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What did the black man say to the policeman? "Take it easy."

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marshal sterio had sex

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What do you call a gay man who has sex with a woman? A bisexual.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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