"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

I have a crush on my dad.

I had sex. Just kidding.

Both my milk chocolate and my white chocolate are brown. Why? I crapped on my white chocolate.

A flock of ostriches run into a mine field

what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? salsa how to you get it out? tostitos

What did nike say to addidas? Hi

Why was 7 afraid of 6? Because 6 accused him of cannibalism

Knock knock Who's there? The mailman The mailman who? The MAILMAN The MAILMAN who? I'm the Fu*king mailman now here's your MAIL!

Woman's rights

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

Yo mamma is so nice, when she bakes a batch of cookies, there's enough for everybody.

Once my grandpa said: Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I said: No. Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I unplugged his life support.?

How do you save a black guy from drowning? You don't.

Knock knock SCREW YOU I BUSY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? People cross roads all the time, each for their own personal reasons. Questioning their motives is generally accepted as being unnecessary, as it is a relatively safe action as log as one is careful and heeds the laws of traffic.

Why do dogs lick their balls? Why? Because they can.

Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? the black baby is black

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then he sits down to enjoy his evening.

what do you call 6 black guys hung in a tree? a arazona wind chime

Why did the fat guy get a gun? Because he was tired of all the fat jokes...

I have adhd theref- hey look a dandelion

how to you kill a black man. with a weapon.

What does an owl and a mole have in common? They both live underground, apart from the owl

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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