Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

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How can you tell if a calendar is popular? From stock order lists and also from accounts records.

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Why wasn't the boy at his basketball game? - Because he, his twin brother, and pregnant mother all died in a fatal car accident involving a train on the way their.

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DOWN

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Why does your mother not love you anymore? Because she was in a tragic car accident 5 years ago and is now deceased and is therefore incapable of love.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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What did the clock say? The time.

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This is probably how President Obama proposed to his wife. "I don't wanna be Obama self"

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What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

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wanna hear a joke? asians with t i t s

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch."

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what's the difference between people and horses? people have two less legs.

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Knock knock What

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck!

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Women Voting

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue A Face Like Yours Belongs In The ZOO. :o

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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what do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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Why did the girl go to the hospital? Her brother dared her to jump off the second story roof of their house...

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I know a black girl named beyonca.

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What's the difference between Bobby and a plane? Bobby can be sexually molested.

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Old McDonald had a farm But due to the lack of government subsidies, he was unable to make his mortgage payments, causing the bank to foreclose on his property.

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What part of NO can't you understand? The part where you pronounce the 'N'.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops