Knock knock. Nobody answers because the homeowner was out of the house at the time.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

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What did the blind man get for Christmas? Poison.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and is therefore ineligible for a driver's license.

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A woman walked into a bar at least that is what she tells her friends about how she got a blackeye.

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What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

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Little Jimmy was afraid, and didn't like Santa Claus. So one Christmas Eve, he poured rat poison in Santa's milk. Little Jimmy no longer has parents.

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Knock Knock! Oh god Johnny, someones at the door! Hide the heroin and bail man, BAIL!!!

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 3

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if I was a girl I would be touching my self everywhere if I was a girl as a boy I would make a diffrence in poltics but thats not gonna happen.

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How do you kill half the population of Mexico? A preemptive nuclear strike.

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whats wierder than two lesbians kissing two homos kissing

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Did you hear the story about the divorcee who was concerned about ecology? Her husband had been hitting her. Good for her to get away from that kind of abuse.

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Why do women hate getting shot? They die.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? There are certainly innumerable differences, but, in general, humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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What do you call a helicopter above Hawaii? A helicopter.

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What is brown and sticky? Poop

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A muslim bought tickets for a 3pm flight. It was 11am, so in the mean time, he went to a bar to loosen up. His bomb vest accidently went off early, killing everyone in the bar. The flight arrived on-time in San Fransico.

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Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

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A terrorist walks into a bar and shoots the bartender.

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What's worse than finding Michael V. in your class? Finding Curtis W. in there instead\

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How do you turn a broken skateboard into a gleaming Rolls Royce? With magic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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