What do 10 dead babies in a blender sound like? Idk because I was too busy masturbating

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None, now stop hallutinating about wood chuck.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

wnba

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the pie say to the other pie? "I'm hungry" So he ate the other pie.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Three facts 1. You are reading this. 2. You realized that is a stupid fact. 3. You are leaving because this was a stupid joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Hey i just F****d you, And this is crazy, Delete my number, And keep the baby!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why doesnt the ladder work? A ladder is an inaminent object therefore imcapable of having a job.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

a black man, spanish man, and white man all fall off a building. and as they fall, i wonder: why are you laughing?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are red violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo don't be sad cause I'll be there to not in the cage but laughing at you

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A seal walks into a club. Do you like my new shoes?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's worse than sibling rivalry? having no bones

thumb_up thumb_down +19

natalie wilson is a hilarious stripper

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a guy who hangs around with musicians? A groupie.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't because it had died from an uncaring mother and father that dumped it's corps on the side of the highway.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why do matt Daly jokes suck? Because he has Downs.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you confuse a black man? Paint him white.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

When do scientologists go to church? When they are done looking at porn.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did i drink 4 sodas? Because i was thirsty

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How did the man with no arm and no legs get to the store? Well he certainly didn't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whos the best Jewish Cook? Hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's the difference between a red Ferrari and a pile of deal babies? The red Ferrari is not in my garage right now.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

as i unscrewed my belly button and suddenly my butt fell off

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops