what does brb mean? ...be right back? ...ok hurry i need to know the answer.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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A black guy with his family.

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Why does Lady GaGa have no hair down there? It's physically impossible to grow hair on your toenails.

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Why couldnt the kid see the pirate movie? Because he didn't have eyes.

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what do you call a black pilot? A) a pilot

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Have you seen Helen Keller's back porch? Neither did she.

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Friends are like pickles. If you eat them, they die.

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Nothing yet CC

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What's worse than eating an apple with aids? Loosing your virginity to the seven chosen ones.

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Why did the baby die? I killed it.

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69

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Doctor- Mr. Smith I have some bad news for you. Mr. Smith- Just tell it to me straight. How long have I got? Doctor- Not long. Mr. Smith- OK.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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When do scientologists go to church? When they are done looking at porn.

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- Knock knock - Those knock jokes are getting old - Indeed. Scratch scratch - MY DOOR

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What did the man do when he was tired Nothing he went to bed

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how do u make a sausage roll push it down a hill

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How do you prevent aids? Nail an orphan to your genitals before sex.

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What's green and has wheels? A bus. I lied about the green.

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What did the stuffed animal say to the human after the human said hi? Nothing, after all stuffed animals can't talk

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What did the the Priest do to the young alter boy? Blessed Him

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Marijuana

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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