Two guys walk into the woods an saw a naked lady.One guys ran away. When his friend met up with him he ask why did u run away. He siad "my mom said if i a naked lady that i would turn to stone and i felt myself getting hard."

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What can't taste with a toung, and it's soul never dies? A shoe

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What did the Vampire say to the pastor? Nothing. You have to be real to talk

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What do you call a man with no heart? Dead.

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What do you call a person who is 6 feet under? Lost.

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-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? -Dog shit.

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Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

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Why does Snoop Dogg need an umbrella? Fo' Drizzle

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? Hello Prostitute.

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What do you get when you cross a cantaloupe and a dog? "Melon-choly"

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Q. How do Italian girls shave their legs? A. They lie down outside and have someone mow them.

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how many Pikachu's can you get in a mini? 14.

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Q - what did one plate say to the other? A - FOods on me tonight!

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Type 17 diabetes. Hepatitis R. Pubic Lice. Just Pubic Lice.

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What do you do when a blond ask you a question? Answer politely and thank her for her wonderful question.

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Do Minnesotans have accents? Oh ya, you betchya.

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9/11/2001

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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Woman: If you were my husband, I've give you poisoned wine. Winston Churchill: Madame, if you were my wife, I would hope we could have enough love to attempt marriage counseling so as to work out these issues.

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if a cat is mean and a dogs a bitch then what do u call your wife? A MEAN ASS BITCH

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Roses are gray. Violets are gray. I am a dog.

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What did the cow say to his friend? Moo.

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-What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. Animals can't talk dumbass.

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Dancing Potatoe!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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