Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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a black guy and a hispanic are in a car. Whos driveing? The bvlack guys mom, picking them up from a church class, and takeing them to volunteer a the local homeless shelter.

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hi

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Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? A:Pull the pin and throw it back

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Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

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What do you call a person who is 6 feet under? Lost.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? -getting raped by 10 very hung men who go balls deep

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Pickup line: Hey do you like flowers? Because you stole my flowers.

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What do you call a puppy with no limbs? It doesn't matter, he's never coming back.

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- Mom, you've got a banana in your ear. - Son I can't hear you I've got a banana in my ear!

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'Knock knock' 'who's there?' 'Whinny the poo' 'Whinny the poo who?' 'Whinny the poo'

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What is the unltimate Jewish dilemma? Free pork

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Woman's rights

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What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

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Two Japanese men walked out of a bar. They drowned.

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What's black and tasteless? either herpes or a redheads soul

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How do you crash an airplane? By not knowing how to fly it.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A bad decision because soccer is in their blood

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What do you call a guy who makes jokes about a girl being in the kitchen? Single.

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If you challenge the tarsier to a staring contest, it wouldnt undersand a word you say, but it would stare at you when you would think that was apropos. the tarsier wouldnt really think anything and would just make a peepee

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Hey you wanna hear a joke? Sure! Well first, do you want part of my sandwich? No thanks.........Are you going to tell your joke? Joke? Um sure. I didn't know I was telling one. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Would you like part of my sandwich?

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? She's dead.

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osama bin ladens hiding spot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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