What do you call someone allergic to water ? Waterproof

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Whats hairless, looks like a bel end and stinks of onions. Adey Bradley

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Q: How can you fit 1000 jews in one car? A: The Ashtray

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Why didn't the little boy get to go to the movies on his birthday? He was both blind and deaf, completely defeating the purpose of going to the movies.

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how big is a midgets dick? i dont know but probably bigger then mine

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Q - what did one plate say to the other? A - FOods on me tonight!

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How do you crash an airplane? By not knowing how to fly it.

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What's black and tasteless? either herpes or a redheads soul

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A bad decision because soccer is in their blood

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asparagus

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Are you understanding any of this caboose? I think so, that guy is really a robot and you his boy friend so that makes you.................a gay robot. yes i am a gay robot. -_-

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Type 17 diabetes. Hepatitis R. Pubic Lice. Just Pubic Lice.

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How many rabbits does it take to screw in a light buld? None, it is scientifically impossible for a rabbit to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

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Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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a man asked another man what time its it. The man responded by telling him the time and asking why he wanted to know. "thats none of your business" he replied. Why did he say it was none of his business? A- because it was none of his business.

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What's harder than nailing a baby to a tree? My penis whilst im doing it.

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What's the difference between a whore and a blonde? There is not enough information to answer this question.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor's office? He had brain cancer.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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Dancing Potatoe!

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What's the same about eggnog and a computer? You can search the web. Except that's only true for one of them.

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What looks like a 50p and has a narrow back?

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Why did the woman walk into the men's clothing store? She's a lesbian. Why did the man walk into the womens clothing store? He had to buy his mom a birthday present.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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