A Black man and an Asian man are at a bar. They have a few drinks and then leave.

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What do you call an alligator in a vest? An amphibious mammal wearing clothes. Why would you ask me that.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had just been to their father's funeral, who was a Welshman.

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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Republicans

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Joseph had been temporarily blinded for over a year. While blind, he saw the doctor who told him he would regain sight the next morning when he woke up. For this special moment, Joseph decided that the first thing he wanted to see was his wife. So, his wife decided to stay up all night so she was in the right position for when Joseph woke up. However, when Joseph woke up and opened his eyes his wife wasn't there so he was a little bit annoyed.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple...

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Three surfers paddle out into the surf. They had a pretty good time, except one of them got a shit ton of water up his nose.

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[] i have read and agree to the terms of service Nope

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What did the Ethiopian get for christmas? Hepatitis B.

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Video Games

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What did the dog say to the dildo? Your rubber

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Why was the man crying He wasnt his allergies were acting up.

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Once my grandpa said: Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I said: No. Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I unplugged his life support.?

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Here is a joke for you: minecraft -blarg

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Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street, Paddy says to Murphy, "Alright Murphy? How's the kids?" Murphy says to Paddy, "Not bad, thanks."

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A Priest and A Rabbi Walk Into The Bar. Ouch.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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What did nike say to addidas? Hi

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Yo mama so fat!... we are very concerned for her health.

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Whats black and smells like white paint? A) Black paint!

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How do you survive in the wilderness? You nail an orphan to a rock underwater.

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hi

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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