yo mama so fat that the doctor asked for her weight not her phone number!

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

Customer: Can I have a tin of red paint, please? Shop owner: I'm sorry sir, we only have yellow paint left. Customer: That's ok, I have my bike with me.

How many monkeys can play COD at once? It depends on how many controllers you have.

How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

The same girl who got cancer for christmas had a birthday soon after, as a present She got kimo...but it failed

Why did the cop not arrest the driver? The Driver shot him 2 minutes earlier.

GUYS! I GOT AN A IN MY PIANO EXAM!!!!!

What do you do if you see a bleeding Mexican in your front yard? Quickly respond to the accident and supply the wounded victim with first aid.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

How did the kid drop his ice he got hit by a train Griffin Cholette

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

How do Chinese people get their names? From their parents.

two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

What is the difference between Santa, and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney

How does a black guy call to another black guy in Africa? using a telephone

Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

a man walked into a bar "ouch"

A man and a dog were sitting on a hill, the dog says to the man "Nice weather we are having today isn't it?" The man then goes insane because dogs can't talk, then later commits suicide from depression caused by his wife leaving him.

Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

What's better than getting to sleep in? Sex for the very first time.

Canada

Q: is this the krusty krab? A: No this is patrick!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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